This is a partial repost from https://bigfootordemon.weebly.com/ It’s the best testimonial I know of that proves Bigfoot / Sasquatch is a spiritual/demonic entity that can manifest itself in the physical realm we live in.

The man who experienced the encounter with Bigfoot doesn’t state his name. He’s called “Shenk” by one of his co-workers.

Whitehall, New York – 1989

There are those who follow Bigfoot / Sasquatch news and research that believe it to be an elusive species of primate. Keeping an open mind, I believe such biological creatures very well may exist. Just the same, some who follow Bigfoot or Sasquatch news get insultingly angry at my personal accounting of this creature as it’s not a version of the topic that they want to believe. Well, you will get that.

The small Adirondack Mountain town of Whitehall, New York is among places renowned for “Bigfoot” sightings. I did not know of this when I was assigned to that town as the active-duty training sergeant for its National Guard unit. What follows is my accounting of something that occurred to me shortly after my arrival there.

The Setting

My first apartment in Whitehall was a duplex located on the outer edge of the small village at the end of a quiet, dead-end street named Champlain Avenue. The setting was quite plain – not the setting one might expect for the event I am going to relate.

My apartment was small – but adequate for me. The downstairs was a new kitchen that opened to the back yard, the living room was an extension of the kitchen and had spiral stairs in one corner that led up to a solitary bedroom with a bathroom attached – everything was new – or at least newly remodeled. My backyard opened out into a vast swampland.

The Encounter

I recall that night well. It was mid-week. I had come home from work, had dinner, then spent a couple hours practicing classical guitar – reading it off sheet music and trying to master some of the simpler scores from Bach or Chopin. This was a hobby I was passionate about then, and to a lesser extent – now. I need to make it clear up front that I did not do illegal drugs then or now. I don’t personally care for drugs. Regardless, even if I had wanted to do drugs, I was in the active-duty army and was drug tested periodically. I took my career seriously and considered myself a professional soldier. I say all this because this little story is about to get wild. What follows is exactly what happened to me late that night. In truth, this encounter bothers me some to this day just to recall the events.

So on this particular night, after finally tiring of guitar playing, I went upstairs to bed around 10 or 11PM. Note I hadn’t been dreaming at all that I could recall and I had no issues going on when I went to bed earlier; it was a routine, quiet night – until this incident.

Suddenly, I awoke and I found myself laying there in bed flat on my back and I was weeping and sobbing hard – unnaturally hard. Thing is, as I was weeping I was totally bewildered because I had no clue at all as to why I was weeping. I was not thinking of anything gloomy or sad but yet was permeated to my soul with an overwhelming sense of dread and gloom. I recall thinking,

“Why am I doing this? What is going on?”

Yet I could not stop myself and I lay there on my back and I wept and cried and I could not move – could not turn or lift my head or body. My face was actually aching from crying and I let out a steady stream of whimpers as the tears flowed from my face soaking the pillow. It was unnatural.

It was like my mind was bound and jailed inside my head while some thing else manipulated my body and the perversion and horror of it were . . . tremendous and real. My head felt feverish and my face was soaked from the forced tears that continued to flow from my tired my eyes. I was completely unable to understand or stop what was happening.

Neither this, nor anything remotely like this, had ever happened to me before or since. I must say also that I was a devout church-going man during this time and certainly not into anything remotely ‘occult’.

As this was going on, I suddenly heard my back door that was just below me on the first floor, slam open very hard with a bang – hard enough that it shook the walls. This was the door that opened out from my kitchen facing the back yard and swamp.

With the opening of the door, I suddenly was released from my possession and stopped sobbing and lay there a moment wondering who was breaking into my place. It was 3AM. I did not know anybody that might just let themselves into my place.

I heard and mentally followed heavy and slow footsteps crossing the kitchen floor – very slowly – about as slow and lethargic sounding as the mummy in the old movies;

thump ! . . .

[sound of kitchen table getting shoved aside roughly]

thump! . . .

thump!

[sound of chair getting knocked over]

thump! . . .

Each step came down with a very solid and wall-rattling heavy thud. Whoever he was – he was large. It was all so unreal. I thought I was being burglarized at this point.

Noteworthy to this encounter is that as I lay there in my bed wide eyed and listening – I could hear my furniture getting roughly relocated as the heavy footsteps proceeded on in slow, rhythmic thuds. Then the sound of a chair being tossed aside with another crash – and now I could tell by the footsteps that it was directly below me in my living room and more furniture was heard and felt being tossed hard. He was coming to the stairs that led to where I was laying.

I had to take action at once!

I quickly got out of bed and grabbed a baseball bat that I had stashed under my bed for such emergency self-defense scenarios. The plan was that I would wait crouched at the top of the stairs and whack this man in the shins – hard – then follow up with a few more thumps and see what was going on. Smack first – ask questions later.

Right about that time, as I formulated this simple plan of action, and as I was heading over to my position by the top of the stairs, I saw something that quite literally froze me in my tracks with icy fear.

Coming up the spiral stairs towards me, gliding smoothly rather than walking, was a huge black silhouette looking form. I stood there immobilized just as I was moments before when in bed. As it ascended the stairs, coming more fully in sight, to my horror I saw the head; then the head and shoulders; and then the torso and legs – all jet back and shadowy with no detailed features. My room and the stairs were fairly lit up from a street light in front of my place that shone through the windows.

I stood there paralyzed with fear, or something made me so I couldn’t move my feet or arms. I was standing wide-eyed and paralyzed. The ball bat was there in my hands but I could not move. The thing stopped walking and glided to a stop directly in front of me – face to face – maybe just a foot between us – maybe less.

I enjoy illustrating this book and could easily draw this entity out but there is no way I care to do that. Understand, I am uneasy even writing of it. Besides, it is simple enough to physically describe.

It stood taller than my six feet. I’d say it stood around 6’3”. It was very stocky – being quite broad and thick at the shoulders and upper torso. The neck was also proportionately thick. It made no sounds or gestures as it held me transfixed in its fiery stare. I could smell a strong, eggy or sulfur-like odor as I stared back into its flaming portals that were the eyes. I was somehow held and thus forced to stare into its eyes. There were no pupils or irises; these eyes were almond-shaped and just a solid flaming red and orange; not at all unlike hot, burning coals when fanned.

Its face was a featureless jet-black cloud to me with except for its very prominent glowing eyes. The eyes actually glowed red with a light that was in no way the result of a reflection. Its arms stayed at its side and while it was in front of me it did not speak or make a sound.

It is hard to describe my state. I was horrified but that is not what kept me petrified. Like minutes earlier while I was in bed, it again exercised a possession over my body but not my thoughts as I had a heightened awareness of what was going on. Though I was desperate to get free, I was absolutely paralyzed – standing up still clutching my baseball bat with both hands but unable to wield it. There was about a foot between myself and this being that had come to see me.

My fear was near total. I say “near” because I could still think rational enough to frantically tell myself that this must be a wild dream because I clenched my eyes shut hard saying it was a dream and I was going to reopen them and find it all gone. I tried this several times but when I opened my eyes I found it was in fact no dream. I don’t know exactly how long I stood there. I know that I was there long enough to try and rationalize that this wasn’t really happening. I recall desperately thinking;

“This has to be a dream! This must be a dream!”

Unable to move, I started yelling for help as I believed my landlord was home next door but undoubtedly asleep at that hour. My cries for help came out in a pathetic, weak voice and no help came. The thing stood before me in control. As I gazed into its eyes, I thought that it seemed to like my fear – that was the feeling I had – that it was actually feeding off my fear. I was held and forced to face this thing eye-to-eye. I felt mocked and violated.

I closed my eyes again hard and this time I began to pray any prayer I could recall – the Lord’s Prayer and the 23rd Psalm. Then I plain called out to Jesus. This time, when I opened them, it was gone and I was released from the paralysis. I recall going to my bedside, dropping to my knees, and saying aloud,

“Oh my God! What was that?”

I was exhausted emotionally. I said another prayer and went to bed – trusting my safety to God and His angels. In my estimate, the whole encounter lasted around five or seven minutes.

The Aftermath

The next morning I awoke early for work. I recall as I got out of bed feeling the emotional strain of the night before yet on me. I felt emotionally beat up and traumatized. I sat on my bedside and thought again, “My God, what was that last night?” I decided that it had to have been some kind of really wild nightmare – nothing more. That thought prevailed and I felt better as I got bathed and dressed for work.

But when I went downstairs to get breakfast I was stunned to find all my chairs and coffee table moved and knocked over, my kitchen table also knocked over and moved, and my back door was wide open; all precisely as I had heard just hours before when this being came into my place. The horror of it all hit me in a huge wave:

It wasn’t a dream!

Now I was really shaken up. Understand that this visitation was a sincerely traumatic event.

All said, I still had a job to do and I went to work that morning. When I got there, it was the usual casual morning scene among the four or five other guys that I worked with at the armory. The coffee was brewing and the men gathered around a table in the break room to read the newspaper, talk some man gossip, bust jokes, and maybe talk shop a bit. Of this scene I was a part, but not on this morning. I’d never been shaken like this in my life.

Upon entering the armory, I walked past the break room without saying a word. I must have looked pretty rough because one of the guys must have noticed the way I was looking and left the break room and followed me to my office.

He came in and said “Shenk, what’s wrong?” I told him nothing, but that I had a bad night. He kept badgering me as to what had happened and I kept telling him it was nothing – and I didn’t want to talk about it. He would not let it go – so I told him.

It’s such a wild story. I was really afraid he would think I was nuts. But he wanted to know so I told all that had happened – except for the perverse part, I never shared that with anybody until now. His reaction surprised me. He called the other few guys into my office – and now I was a bit embarrassed. Smiling, as if he had discovered something, he told me to tell the guys what had happened to me. They all stood before my desk in my office and listened. Nobody laughed or scoffed at me.

“Congratulations!” the eldest of them said. “Welcome to Whitehall.”

They said I had seen what they called Bigfoot. This was a long standing local legend – a rare but sporadically occurring phenomenon to the area. Bigfoot! Well, what else could they call it? It certainly wasn’t an animal or of flesh.

A couple weeks later, the local newspaper ran a story about several locals who had seen a large black figure with glowing red eyes in the area. I can say with all honesty, I had never in my life heard anything of Whitehall’s “Bigfoot” story prior to my own experience – there was absolutely no influence upon this experience.

(End of Shenk’s testimony.)

I have also heard of people who claimed they were abducted by aliens, and who ended the encounter suddenly like Shenk did by calling on the Name of Jesus! Jesus’s Name is powerful! He is the King of all the universe and evil spirits flee when they hear His Name!

I know that from personal experience. When I was around 10 years old, I was temporarily taken over by an evil spirit for a few seconds. It occurred once or twice a year and continued up to the time I was 20 years old and serving in the US Air Force. I could feel what the spirit must have been feeling: A feeling of total isolation, loneliness, and hopelessness. The encounters ended after I got saved and was born again through the knowledge of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. The next time I felt the evil spirit come on me again in early 1971, I called on the Name of Jesus and the evil spirit immediately left me! It never returned!! Thank you Jesus for deliverance from demonic forces! I think I might have picked it up at a Catholic grotto my mother took me to. I felt strange spiritual forces there.

I got this from a Facebook post written by Steve Andrews on September 16, 2022.

If you are unfamiliar with the doctrine of dispensationalism, I have several articles on this site that explain what it means and its influence on popular End-time teaching today.

By Steve Andrews

Regarding the Jesuit invention of the singular “the Antichrist” / false doctrine, “dispensationalism”. All roads lead to Rome in this regard.

I’ve read that this was probably a set up ….like the one sole AntiChrist. The conversion from the antichrist spirit to a singular AntiChrist was popularized by Iranaeus and Tertullian.

The Protestants claimed the Roman Catholic Church met the criteria of the antichrist. In 1554, during the Council of Trent, the Jesuits (Catholic elitists) were commissioned by the Pope to develop a new interpretation of Scripture that would counteract these Protestant claims that the Roman Catholic church fulfilled the Bible prophecy of an antichrist.

In 1590, Jesuit Francisco Ribera published a 500-page commentary on Revelation called “In Sacrum Beati Ioannis Apostoli, & Evangelistiae Apocalypsin Commentarij”. His commentary was never translated to any other language, and it was for the eyes of the Catholic hierarchy only. As a result, Ribera said since the papal was timeless and could not be the antichrist since the antichrist had to be a single identity.

A subsequent Jesuit, Cardinal Bellarmine added the AntiChrist would be an evil man who would reign for seven years at the end of the time.

We see the emergence of modern dispensationalism as a result which would not have been possible without the Freemasonic banker Henry Drummond – a fellow in the Royal Society of Freemasons.

The Reformation leaders believed that the Catholic Church was the antichrist system because of their centuries long inquisitions and killing hundreds of thousands of people it believed to be heretics. The Jesuits were recruited to infiltrate Protestantism and spread the doctrine of dispensationalism.

The Catholic Church being an antichrist is far too myopic to assume they are the end-all be-all of the antichrist system. It’s just one part of the Beast system.

Freemason Darby is the father dispensationalism using esoterics and the Kabbalah – not found in the Bible. Darby popularized the corruption-ridden attorney Scofield in the United States….which is Zionism.

Scofield turned Jesus into the AntiChrist alleging that Lucifer is who the world should be praising. They see Jesus is the AntiChrist because they see themselves as God.

A core part of dispensationalism is the third temple will be rebuilt when the AntiChrist secures a peace treaty between Israel (the nation Zionists contrived, not the true Hebraic Israelites who were exterminated by Zionists) and its neighbors. This became more popular by dispensationalist and Freemason Tim LaHaye of the LeftBehind Series.

Dispensationalism was invented as a self-preservation technique by the Catholic Church to remain in power.

Let’s start off with definitions:

“Democracy is self-government through popular sovereignty, based on the principle of majority rule. Simply put, the people rule, and legitimacy is determined by what more than half of the people want.” James Madison, the “Father of the Constitution” and the fourth president of the United States of America.

A simple definition of democracy is mob rule. The founding fathers of America didn’t want that. They wanted to make laws that would protect the individual from the mob.

A republic is a system of government wherein the people elect representatives to make their decisions for them, such as Congress in the United States.

Here’s the liberal definition of “democracy”: “An all-powerful federal government, having a leftist, international orientation, making every human equal to the next human by using whatever force is necessary, including censorship, arrest and imprisonment.”

The USA is supposed to be a constitutional republic, a government ruled by the laws of the constitution, not by the majority rule of the people.

Did you know that the word “democracy” is not used anywhere in the Constitution of the United States of America? Did you know that the founding fathers of the Constitution didn’t believe in the concept of democracy? Their aim was not to found a democracy, but a republic. i.e. a government where everybody including the government officials themselves summit to the rule of Law!

The quotes below are excepts from
The Secret Side of History; Mystery Babylon and the New World Order Paperback – January 1, 1996 by Dee Zahner

Another system of government the Founding Fathers rejected was a Democracy. To understand why they rejected a Democracy, we will let them speak for themselves.

On June 21, 1788, Alexander Hamilton made a speech in which he stated:

It had been observed that a pure democracy if it were practicable would be the most perfect government. Experience has proved that no position is more false than this. The ancient democracies in which the people themselves deliberated never possessed one good feature of government. Their very character was tyranny; their figure deformity.

One of the architects of the principles of American republicanism that shaped the political culture of the United States, John Adams, warned:

Remember, Democracy never lasts long. It soon wastes, exhaust and murders itself. There never was a democracy that did not commit suicide.

James Madison wrote:

Democracies have ever been spectacles of turbulence and contention; have ever been found incompatible with personal security, or the rights of property; and have in general been as short in their lives as they have been violent in their deaths.

But, why doesn’t democracy work? Why isn’t it a good form of government? The answer lies in a fatal tendency of man to aspire to live off the labors of someone else. To live, man must either work or steal. Experience shows that he will do whichever is safest and easiest. Thus, the majority will always follow demagogues who promise to use the law to give them other men’s property, property usually taken by taxes. Once the law is perverted into a system of legalized plunder to redistribute wealth, a right sense of justice is destroyed. Special interest groups are then formed to lobby government for their share of the wealth. Class hatred is generated, violence and anarchy then usher in the fall of the government and the establishment of a dictatorship.

This process is explained very well in the 1928 U. S. Army Training Manual as it gives a definition of democracy:

A government of the masses. Authority derived through mass meeting or any form of direct expression. Results in mobocracy. Attitude toward property is communistic — negating property rights. Attitude toward law is that the will of the majority shall regulate, whether it be based upon deliberation or governed by passion, prejudice, and impulse, without restraint or regard to consequences. Results in demagogism, license, agitation, discontent, anarchy.

Because of a willingness to profit from the lessons of history, the Founding Fathers adopted a constitution that nowhere mentioned a democracy, as neither did the Declaration of Independence, nor a single constitution of our fifty states.

What the Founding Fathers did choose to establish was a government of written and permanent law. Realizing that men can only remain free by limiting political power, these laws restricted the power of government.

Rather than enumerate a long list of freedoms guaranteed to the people, they enumerated a short list of what government could and could not do. Basically, this limited government to protecting life, liberty, and property.

(End of excerpts from Dee Zahner’s book.)

Leftists and dictators love to use the word “democratic” in the official name of their countries to give their people the impression their government is by the people and for the people. The nations listed below are all authoritarian regimes.

People’s Democratic Republic of Algeria
Democratic Republic of the Congo
Federal Democratic Republic of Ethiopia
Lao People’s Democratic Republic
Democratic People’s Republic of Korea

Former Communist East Germany was called: German Democratic Republic.

Arthur Walkington Pink (1 April 1886 – 15 July 1952) was an English Bible teacher who sparked a renewed interest in the exposition of Reformed Theology.

This article is based on Matthew 18:21-35, the lesson of forgiveness Jesus taught Peter. The master of a servant forgave a huge debt of 10,000 talents his servant owed him, but the same servant would not forgive his fellow servant of a small debt of only 100 pence!

Let’s see how much money the Bible is referring to in today’s currency in US dollars.

I got the following information from various web sources. If you find something wrong with the values or my math, please tell me in the comments section below.

The New Testament talent was the equivalent of 6000 denarii.

A denarius was a silver coin weighing 60 grains.

There are 437.5 grains in one ounce.

The current price of silver on the date of this article is $17.31 USD an ounce.

$17.31 ÷ 437.5 = $0.0395657143 per grain of silver.

$0.0395657143 X 60 = $2.373942858 is the current value of one denarius.

$2.373942858 X 6000 = $14,243.657148 is the current value of one talent.

$14,243.657148 X 10,000 = $142,436,571.48 USD is the current value of ten thousand talents.

This is a considerable amount of money the average person would never be able to repay, and yet the man was forgiven that debt by his master! It reminds me of the debt we all owe to our Creator. Only our redeemer Jesus Christ had the wherewithal to pay that debt for us!

According to https://www.bible.ca/coins/bible-coins-Jesus-used-in-the-New-Testament.htm
a “pence” is another name for a denarius. Therefore the debt of 100 pence the fellow servant owed the servant who had the debt of 10,000 talents was only $237 USD in today’s money. It’s exceedingly less than the enormous debt of 10,000 talents or $142 million dollars. This is the difference between our sins against God compared to the sins of others against us! 142 million is nearly 600,000 times greater than 237! (142,000,000 / 237 = 599156) Is it too hard for us to forgive our brother, friend or even enemy who asks forgiveness from us?

I have held grudges for a time against certain people during certain times and situations, but later when the situation changed, God gave me the grace to forgive the people in question. How can I say I forgave them? I would travel out of my way to their homes to fellowship with them.

The meaning of the word “argument” in the title of this post that I am using is defined by the Merriam-Webster dictionary as,

“A coherent series of reasons, statements or facts intended to support or establish a point of view.

In this article, however, I want to give you just one basic simple-to-understand reason, something there is no way people who believe the earth is flat can explain away. They may try but their logic will be faulty and unscientific. They mock science and tell us not to trust the scientists. And they do have a point about some science and scientists. There are of course pseudo-sciences, false sciences that academic institutions teach. All Christians should know there are sciences falsely so-called such as Darwinian evolution. But not all sciences are false. If they were you wouldn’t have the technology to read this on your PC, tablet or phone. And some science is downright evil! I’m talking about gene editing and the pharmaceutical industry making new drugs that are ultimately harmful to health.

You may ask, “Why yet another article about Flat-earth?” This will make it 10 articles in all on this website and will be probably my last one.

I am absolutely alarmed that so many good people, even men and women of God, are falling into the Flat-earth cult trap! Recently a good talk show host I loved to listen to, Stew Peters, fell into that trap. Yes, just like him, I don’t trust NASA either. But NASA is not the only space agency putting satellites into orbit. And I didn’t learn the earth is a sphere from NASA. NASA was created in 1957. Academics knew the earth is a sphere for two millennia.

The Greek philosopher Pythagoras was the first to come up with the concept of a spherical Earth back in the 6th century BCE. Pythagoras’s idea was based on his observations of the moon during a lunar eclipse. He noticed that the shadow cast by the Earth on the moon was always round, no matter what part of the planet was facing the moon. This was one of the first pieces of evidence that people had that the Earth might be a sphere.

Recently I posted on social media a remark that the earth cannot be flat, and a Flat-earther commented, “Give it a rest!” Is it OK for them to proclaim their Flat-earth propaganda but not for me to knock it?

Why I think it’s bad for a Christian to proclaim the earth is flat: The Bible tells us we should speak truth.

Zechariah 8:16  These are the things that ye shall do; Speak ye every man the truth to his neighbour; execute the judgment of truth and peace in your gates:

Proverbs 14:5  A faithful witness will not lie: but a false witness will utter lies.

I believe promoting flat earth is promoting a lie. It hurts our witness for Christ to the unbelieving world.

Here’s the argument I believe to be the ultimate reason against Flat-earth theory:

The sun cannot be seen at night. The sun is the brightest and most powerful source of energy in our solar system. If the sun cannot be seen at night, something must be blocking it from our view! What could be big enough to block it? Only the earth itself! The sun is obviously visible on the other side of the earth because all all times exactly 1/2 of the earth is illumiated by the sun while the other half is in darkness. If the earth is flat, the sun must be therefore illuminating the bottom side of the earth for the earth to block the sun, and even Flat-earthers themselves will not say people live on both sides of a flat earth! The only model that can explain why we cannot see the sun at night is a spherical model. The sun is hidden by the earth itself due to its curvature.

End of discussion.

More articles about Flat-earth:

John Coleman

This article is mainly for those who know about Dr. John Coleman who claimed to be a former MI6 agent.

I read Dr. John Coleman’s book, “CONSPIRATORS’ HIERARCHY: THE STORY OF THE COMMITTEE
OF 300 sometime in the late 1990s. This was before I first heard of the Jesuit / Vatican conspiracy. John Coleman made a lot of sense to me then, but over the years I started having doubts about him.

According to Coleman, the world is run by a committee of 300 men with the British monarch at the head. The book sounded good and right when I first read it, but after 20 more years of research, I now believe it to be disinformation.

A MAJOR red flag for me about Coleman’s book, The Story of the Committee of the 300, is the fact that it’s on the official cia.gov website! https://www.cia.gov/library/abbottabad-compound/4A/4A92FD2FB4DAE3F773DB0B7742CF0F65_Coleman.-.CONSPIRATORS.HIERARCHY.-.THE.STORY.OF.THE.COMMITTEE.OF.300.R.pdf

Just click on the URL and you will see it’s true. WHY would an intelligence agency that is arguably working for the global elite / Jesuit General / Vatican post Coleman’s work on its website if what Coleman is saying is true? It doesn’t make sense.

According to John Coleman, the Committee of 300 is the ulimate ruling body of the world and the now deceased Queen Elizabeth II was the head of it. I definitely do not think so! Dr. Coleman does not talk about the power of the Roman Catholic Church, nor the Vatican, nor the Jesuits. If you are not familiar with my worldview about the Roman Catholic Church and the Jesuits, please read my article about it.

Moreover, John Coleman refuses to disclose much about his background. There is no evidence he was a MI6 agent. Why does he use the title of Dr.? He has a doctorate in what? He doesn’t tell us. The name John Coleman may be a psudeonym. According to https://www.truthcontrol.com/articles/eustace-mullins-exposed-dr-john-coleman-1992 his name may really be John Clarke.

Because of my doubts about John Coleman, I removed two articles from him I posted in 2013 from this website, the Story of the Committee of the 300 article and what he said about Tavistock. I don’t want to be guity of spreading disinformation.

Can we trust anyone who claims to be a former intellegence agent? I used to think that former CIA agent Mark Phillips was legit. He rescued MKULTRA victim Cathy O’Brien. Or did he? Some believed that Phillips was Cathy O’Brien’s new handler. I have doubts about Phillips because he tried to debunk the testimonial of another MKULTRA victim, Brice Taylor, AKA Sue Ford, who wrote, “Thanks for the Memories.” I find her testimonial very credible.

Does it make sense to trust the testimonial of a former intellence agent? He may be mixing fact with fiction to intentionally sow disinformation because he is still on the agency’s payroll! His motivation may be monetary. I think the Story of the Committee of 300 must have made a lot of money for Dr. Coleman. To me the mark of a true whistleblower is persecution. Did John Coleman experience anything like what Julian Assange or Edward Snowden went through? I sure haven’t hear about it. Coleman is only famous among conspiracy researchers. He hasn’t come close to the fame of Assange or Snowden. Often an insider with highly classified information gets taken out or neutralized by the people he used to work for.

Of course all of the above are only my opinions. You can decide for yourself. The critique of the Committee of 300 by Col Barry Turner makes a lot of sense to me.

Col Barry Turner – Committee of 300 John Coleman – Critique

If after listening to what Barry Turner has to say and you don’t agree with him or me, please post comments in the comment section and I will reconsider. The Bible says we see through a glass darkly. Nobody’s perfect, right? I’m the first to admit that about myself.

The Geneva Bible was the English Bible of the leaders of the Protestant Reformation up till the time that the King James authorized version took its place. Some people have questioned what the motivation of King James was in authorizing a new translation. Was it because he didn’t like the notes in the Geneva Bible? As you can see, the writers of the notes in the Geneva Bible clearly pointed the finger at the Roman Catholic Church for being the woman and the whore of Revelation 17 and 18. And they considered the “scarlet coloured beast” of those chapters as the governmental system of which Rome was – and still is – the head.

I believe the King James version is still the best translation of the English Bible we have today. This article is merely to show what the Protestant leaders thought of the Roman Catholic Church and the Pope.

The bold emphasis on this page are mine.

Re 17:1

17:1 And {1} there came one of the seven angels which had the seven vials, and talked with me, saying unto me, Come hither; I will shew unto {2} thee the {a} judgment of the great whore that sitteth upon many waters:

(1) The state of the Church militant being declared, now follows the state of the church overcoming and getting victory, as I showed before in the beginning of the tenth chapter. This state is set forth in four chapters. As in the place before I noted, that in that history the order of time was not always exactly observed so the same is to be understood in this history, that it is distinguished according to the people of which it speaks, and that the stories of the people are observed in the time of it. For first is delivered the story of Babylon destroyed in this and the next chapter (for this Babylon out of all doubt, shall perish before the two beasts and the dragon). Secondly, is delivered the destruction of both the two beasts, chapter nineteen and lastly of the dragon, chapter eighteen. In the story of the spiritual Babylon, are distinctly set forth the state of it in this chapter, and the overthrow done from the first argument, consisting of the particular calling of the prophet (as often before) and a general proposition.
(2) That is, that damnable harlot, by a figure of speech called “hyppalage”. For John as yet had not seen her. Although another interpretation may be thought of, yet I like this better.
(a) The sentence that is pronounced against this harlot.

Re 17:3

17:3 {3} So he carried me away in the spirit into the wilderness: and I saw a woman sit upon a {b} scarlet coloured beast, full of names of blasphemy, having seven heads and ten horns.

(3) Henceforth is propounded the type of Babylon, and the state of it, in four verses. After, a declaration of the type, in the rest of this chapter. In the type are described two things, the beast (of whom chapter thirteen speaks), in this verse and the woman that sits on the beast in Re 17:4-6 . The beast in process of time has gotten somewhat more than was expressed in the former vision. First in that it is not read before that he was apparelled in scarlet, a robe imperial and of triumph. Secondly, in that this is full of names of blasphemy: the other carried the name of blasphemy only in his heads. So God teaches that this beast is much increased in impiety and injustice and does in this last age, triumph in both these more insolently and proudly then ever before.
(b) A scarlet colour, that is, with a red and purple garment: and surely it was not without cause the romish clergy were so much delighted with this colour.

Re 17:4

17:4 And {4} the woman was arrayed {5} in purple and scarlet colour, and decked with gold and precious stones and pearls, having {6} a golden cup in her hand full of abominations and filthiness of her fornication:

(4) That harlot, the spiritual Babylon, which is Rome. She is described by her attire, profession, and deeds.
(5) In attire most glorious, triumphant, most rich, and most gorgeous.
(6) In profession the nourisher of all, in this verse and teaching her mysteries to all, Re 17:5 setting forth all things most magnificently: but indeed fatally besetting miserable men with her cup, and brings upon them a deadly giddiness.

Re 17:5

17:5 {7} And upon her forehead [was] a name written, MYSTERY, {8} BABYLON THE GREAT, THE MOTHER OF HARLOTS AND ABOMINATIONS OF THE EARTH.

(7) Deceiving with the title of religion, and public inscription of mystery: which the beast in times past did not bear.
(8) An exposition: in which John declares what manner of woman this is.

Re 17:6

17:6 {9} And I saw the woman drunken with the blood of the saints, and with the blood of the martyrs of Jesus: {10} and when I saw her, I wondered with great admiration.

(9) In manner of deeds: She is red with blood, and sheds it most licentiously, and therefore is coloured with the blood of the saints, as on the contrary part, Christ is set forth imbued with the blood of her enemies; Isa 63:1 .
(10) A passage to the second part of this chapter, by occasion given of John, as the words of the angel do show in the next verse.

Re 17:7

17:7 {11} And the angel said unto me, Wherefore didst thou marvel? I will tell thee the mystery of the woman, and of the beast that carrieth her, which hath the seven heads and ten horns.

(11) The second part or place as I said in See Geneva “Re 17:1”. The narration of the vision promised in the verse following. Now there is delivered first a narration of the beast and his story, to verse fourteen. After, of the harlot, to the end of the chapter.

Re 17:8

17:8 {12} The beast that thou sawest {13} was, and is not; and {14} shall ascend out of the bottomless pit, and go into perdition: and they that dwell on the earth shall wonder, whose names were not written in the book of life from the foundation of the world, {15} when they behold the beast that was, and is not, and yet is.

(12) The story of the beast has a triple description of him. The first is a distinction of this beast from all that ever have been at any time: which distinction is contained in this verse: The second is a delineation or painting out of the beast by things present, by which he might even at that time be known by the godly: and this delineation is according to his heads in Re 17:12-14 . This beast is that empire of Rome, of which I spoke in see Geneva (15) “Re 13:11” according to the mutations and changes of which then had already happened, the Holy Spirit has distinguished and set out the same. The apostle distinguishes this beast from all others in these words “the beast which thou saw, was and is not.” For so I expound the words of the apostle for the evidence’s sake, as I will further declare in the notes following.
(13) The meaning is, that beast which you saw before in Re 13:1 and which you have now seen, was (was I say) from Julius Caesar in respect to beginning, rising up, station, glory, dominion, manner and family, from the house of Julius: and yet is not now the same, if you look to the house and family: for the dominion of this family was translated to another, after the death of Nero from that other to a third, from a third to a fourth, and so on, was varied and altered by innumerable changes. Finally, the Empire is one, as it were one beast: but exceedingly varied by kindreds, families, and persons. It was therefore (says John) in the kindred or house of Julius: and now it is not in that kindred, but translated to another.
(14) As if he should say, “Also this same that is, shall shortly not be: but shall ascend out of the depth, or out of the sea” (as was said) in Re 13:1 that is, shall be a new stock from among the nations without difference and shall in the same state go to into destruction, or run and perish: and so shall successively new princes or emperors come and go, arise and fall, the body of the beast remaining still, but tossed with many frequent alterations, as no man can but marvel that this beast was able to stand and hold out, in so many mutations, verily no empire that ever was tossed with so many changes, and as it were with so many tempests of the sea, ever continued so long.

Re 17:9

17:9 {16} And here [is] the mind which hath wisdom. The {c} seven heads {17} are seven mountains, on which the woman sitteth.

(16) An exhortation preparing for the readers in the same argument, as that of Christ “He that hath ears to hear let him hear”. I would rather read in this passage “Let there be here a mind, etc”. So the angel passes to the second place of this description.
(c) Children know what the seven hilled city is, which is so much spoken of, and where of Virgil thus reports, “And compasses seven towers in one wall”, that city it is, which when John wrote these things, had rule over the kings of the earth. It was and is not, and yet it remains to this day, but it is declining to destruction.
(17) This is the description of the beast by things present (as I said before) by which John endeavoured to describe the same, that he might be both known of the godly in that age, and be further observed and marked of posterity afterwards. This delineation has one tip, that is, his heads, but a double description or application of the type: one permanent, from the nature itself, the other changeable, by the working of men. The description permanent, is by the seven hills, in this verse, the other that flees, is from the seven kings, Re 17:10,11 . Here it is worthy to be observed, that one type has sometime two or more applications, as seems good to the Holy Spirit to express, either one thing by various types, or various things by one type. So I noted before of the seven spirits in see Geneva “Re 1:4”. Now this woman that sits on seven hills, is the city of Rome, called in times past by the Greeks, “upon a hill” i. of seven tops or crests and by Varro, “septiceps” i. of her seven heads (as here) of seven heads, and by others, “septem collis” i. standing upon seven hills.

Re 17:10

17:10 {18} And there are seven kings: {19} five are fallen, {20} and one is, {21} [and] the other is not yet come; and when he cometh, he must continue a short space.

(18) The beginning of these kings or emperors is almost the same as the beginning of the Church of Christ, which I showed before in see Geneva (2) “Re 11:1”. Namely from the 25th year after the passion of Christ, at which time the temple and church of the Jews was overthrown. In this year it came to pass by the providence of God, that that saying “The beast was, and is not” was fulfilled before the destruction of the Jews immediately following, came to pass. That was 809 years from the building of the city of Rome at which time John counted the emperors who had been, when he wrote these things, and foretells two others next to come: and with this purpose, that when this particular prediction of things to come should take effect, the truth of all other predictions in the Church, might be the more confirmed. God in ancient times mentioned this sign in the Law and Jeremiah confirmed it in De 18:1-22, Jer 28:8 .
(19) Whose names are these: the first, Servius Sulpitius Galba, who was the seventh emperor of the people of Rome, the second Marcus Salvius Otho, the third Avlus Vitellius, the fourth, Titus Flavius Vespasianus, the fifth, Titus Vespasianus his son, of his own name.
(20) Flavius Domitian, son of the first Vespasian. For in the latter end of his days John wrote these things, as witnesses Irenaus; Lib. 5 adversus hareses.
(21) Nerua, The empire being now translated from the family of Flavius. This man reigned only one year, four months and nine days, as the history writers tell.

Re 17:11

17:11 {22} And the beast that was, and is not, even he is {23} the eighth, and is {24} of the seven, {25} and goeth into perdition.

(22) This is spoken by synecdoche, as if to say, as that head of the beast which was and is not, because it is cut off, and Nerua in so short time extinguished. How many heads there were, so many beasts there seemed to be in one. See a similar speech in Re 13:3 .
(23) Nerua Traianus, who in various respects is called here the seventh and the eighth.
(24) Though in number and order of succession he is the eighth yet he is counted with one of these heads, because Nerua and he were one head. For this man obtained authority together with Nerua and was Consul with him, when Nerua died.
(25) Namely, to persecute the Churches of Christ, as history agrees, and I have briefly noted see Geneva “Re 2:10”.

Re 17:12

17:12 {26} And the ten horns which thou sawest are {27} ten kings, which have received no kingdom as yet; but receive power as kings {28} one hour with the beast.

(26) The third place of this description, as I said in see Geneva “Re 17:8” is a prophetical prediction of things to come, which the beast should do, as in the words following John does not obscurely signify, saying, “which have not yet received the kingdom, etc”. For there is an antithesis or opposition between these kings, and those that went before. First the persons are described in this verse, then their deeds, in the two verses following.
(27) That is, arising with their kingdoms out of that Roman beast: at such time as that political empire began to fall by the plotting of the popes.
(28) Namely, with that second beast, whom we called before a false prophet, who ascending out of the earth, got to himself all the authority and power of the first beast, and exercised the same before his face, as was said in Re 14:11,12 . For when the political empire of the west began to bow downwards, there arose those ten kings, and the second beast took the opportunity offered to usurp for himself all the power of the former beast. These kings long ago, many have numbered and described to be ten, and a great part of the events plainly testifies the same in this our age.

Re 17:13

17:13 {29} These have one mind, and shall give their power and strength unto the beast.

(29) That is, by consent and agreement, that they may conspire with the beast, and depend on his call. Their story is divided into three parts, counsels, acts, and events. The counsellors some of them consist in communicating of judgments and affections: and some in communicating of power, which they are said to have given to this beast, in this verse.

Re 17:14

17:14 These shall make war with the {30} Lamb, and the Lamb shall overcome them: for he is Lord of lords, and King of kings: and they that are with him [are] called, and chosen, and faithful.

(30) With Christ and his Church, as the reason following declares, and here are mentioned the facts and events which followed for Christ’s sake, and for the grace of God the Father towards those that are elected, called, and are his faithful ones in Christ.

Re 17:15

17:15 {31} And he saith unto me, The waters which thou sawest, where the whore sitteth, {32} are peoples, and multitudes, and nations, and tongues.

(31) This is the other part of the narration, as I said in see Geneva “Re 17:7” belonging to the harlot, showed in the vision, Re 17:3 . In this history of the harlot, these three things are distinctly propounded, what is her magnificence, in this verse, what is her fall, and by whom it shall happen to her, in Re 17:16,17 : and lastly, who that harlot is, in Re 17:18 . This passage which by order of nature should have been the first, is therefore made the last, because it was more fit to be joined with the next chapter.
(32) That is, as changing and variable as the waters. Upon this foundation sits this harlot as queen, a vain person, on that which is vain.

Re 17:16

17:16 And the ten {33} horns which thou sawest upon the beast, these shall hate the whore, and shall make her desolate and naked, and shall eat her flesh, and burn her with fire.

(33) The ten kings, as Re 17:12 . The accomplishment of this fact and event is daily increased in this our age by the singular providence and most mighty government of God. Therefore the facts are propounded in this verse, and the cause of them in the verses following.

Re 17:17

17:17 {34} For God hath put in their hearts to fulfil his will, and to agree, and give their kingdom unto the beast, until the words of God shall be fulfilled.

(34) A reason rendered from the chief efficient cause, which is the providence of God, by which alone John by inversion of order affirms to have come to pass, both that the kings should execute on the harlot that which pleased God, and which he declared in the verse before: and also that by one consent and counsel, they should give their kingdom to the beast, etc. Re 17:13,14 for as these being blinded have before depended on the call of the beast that lifts up the harlot, so it is said, that afterward it shall come to pass, that they shall turn back, and shall fall away from her, when their hearts shall be turned into better state by the grace and mercy of God.

Re 17:18

17:18 And the woman which thou sawest is that {35} great city, which reigneth over the kings of the earth.

(35) That is, Rome that great city, or only city (as Justinian calls it) the king and head of which was then the emperor, but now the pope, since the condition of the beast was changed.

Re 18:1

18:1 And {1} after these things I saw another {2} angel come down from heaven, having great power; and the earth was lightened with his glory.

(1) The second passage (as I said before) see Geneva “Re 17:1” of the history of Babylon, is of the woeful fall and ruin of that whore of Babylon. This historical prediction concerning her, is threefold. The first a plain and simple foretelling of her ruin, in three verses Re 18:2,3 . The second a figurative prediction by the circumstances, from there to Re 18:4-20 . The third, a confirmation of the same by sign or wonder, to the end of the chapter Re 18:21-24 .
(2) Either Christ the eternal word of God the Father (as often elsewhere) or a created angel, and one deputed to this service, but thoroughly provided with greatness of power, and with light of glory, as the ensign of power.

Re 18:2

18:2 {3} And he cried mightily with a strong voice, saying, Babylon the great is fallen, is fallen, and is become the habitation of devils, and the hold of every foul spirit, and a cage of every unclean and hateful bird.

(3) The prediction of her ruin, containing both the fall of Babylon, in this verse, and the cause of it uttered by way of allegory concerning her spiritual and carnal wickedness, that is, her most great impiety and injustice, in Re 18:3 . Her fall is first declared by the angel, and then the greatness of it is shown here, by the events when he says it shall be the seat and habitation of devils, of wild beasts, and of cursed souls, as in Isa 13:21 and often elsewhere.

Re 18:4

18:4 {4} And I heard another voice from heaven, saying, {5} Come out of her, my people, that ye {6} be not partakers of her sins, and that ye receive not of her plagues.

(4) The second prediction, which is of the circumstances of the ruin of Babylon: of these there are two types: one going before it, as beforehand the godly are delivered, to the ninth verse Re 18:5-9 : the other following on her ruin, namely the lamentation of the wicked, and rejoicing of the godly, to the twentieth verse Re 18:10-20 .
(5) Two circumstance going before the ruin, are commanded in this place: one is that the godly depart out of Babylon: as I mentioned in chapter twelve to have been done in time past, before the destruction of Jerusalem: this charge is given here and in the next verse. The other is, that every one of them occupy themselves in their own place, in executing the judgment of God, as it was commanded of the Levites in Ex 32:27 and that they sanctify their hands to the Lord.
(6) Of this commandment there are two causes: to avoid the contamination of sin and to shun the participation of those punishments that belong to it.

Re 18:5

18:5 For her sins have {a} reached unto heaven, and God hath remembered her iniquities.

(a) He uses a word which signifies the following of sins one after another, and rising one of another in such sort, that they grow at length to such a heap, that they come up even to heaven.

Re 18:6

18:6 {7} Reward her even as she rewarded you, and double unto her double according to her works: in the cup which she hath filled fill to her double.

(7) The provocation of the godly, and the commandment of executing the judgment of God, stand on three causes which are here expressed: the unjust wickedness of the whore of Babylon, in this verse, her cursed pride opposing itself against God, which is the fountain of all evil actions, Re 18:7 and her most just damnation by the sentence of God, Re 18:8 .

Re 18:7

18:7 How much she hath glorified herself, and lived deliciously, so much torment and sorrow give her: for she saith {b} in her heart, I sit a queen, and am {c} no widow, and shall {d} see no sorrow.

(b) With herself.
(c) I am full of people and mighty.
(d) I shall taste of none.

Re 18:8

18:8 Therefore shall her plagues come in {e} one day, death, and mourning, and famine; and she shall be utterly burned with fire: for strong [is] the Lord God who judgeth her.

(e) Shortly, and at one instant.

Re 18:9

18:9 And {8} the kings of the earth, who have committed fornication and lived deliciously with her, shall bewail her, and lament for her, when they shall see the smoke of her burning,

(8) The circumstances following the fall of Babylon, or the consequences of it (as I distinguished them in) see Geneva “Re 18:4” are two. Namely the lamentation of the wicked to Re 18:5-19 and the rejoicing of the godly in Re 18:20 . This sorrowful lamentation, according to those that lament, has three parts: the first of which is the mourning of the kings and mighty men of the earth, Re 18:9,10 : The second is, the lamentation of the merchants that trade by land, to the sixteenth verse: Re 18:11-16 . The third is, the wailing of those that trade by sea, in Re 18:16-18 . In each of those the cause and manner of their mourning is described in order, according to the condition of those that mourn, with observation of that which best agrees to them.

Re 18:11

18:11 {9} And the merchants of the earth shall weep and mourn over her; for no man buyeth their merchandise any more:

(9) The lamentation of those that trade by land, as I distinguished before.

Re 18:14

18:14 {10} And the {f} fruits that thy soul lusted after are departed from thee, and all things which were dainty and goodly are departed from thee, and thou shalt find them no more at all.

(10) An apostrophe, or turning of the speech by imitation, used for more vehemence, as if those merchants, as mourners, should in passionate speech speak to Babylon, though now utterly fallen and overthrown; Isa 13:9 and in many other places.
(f) By this is meant that season which is before the fall of the leaf, at which time fruit ripens, and the word signifies such fruits as are longed for.

Re 18:17

18:17 {11} For in one hour so great riches is come to nought. And every shipmaster, and all the company in ships, and sailors, and as many as trade by sea, stood afar off,

(11) The manner of mourning used by them that trade by sea.

Re 18:20

18:20 Rejoice over her, {12} [thou] heaven, and [ye] holy apostles and prophets; for God hath avenged you on her.

(12) The other consequence on the ruin of Babylon, is the exultation or rejoicing of the godly in heaven and in earth as was noted in this verse.

Re 18:21

18:21 {13} And a mighty angel took up a stone like a great millstone, and cast [it] into the sea, saying, Thus with violence shall that great city Babylon be thrown down, and shall be found no more at all.

(13) The third prediction, as I said see Geneva “Re 18:1” based on a sign, and the interpretation of it: the interpretation of it is in two sorts, first by a simple proposal of the thing itself, in this verse, and then by declaration of the events, in the verses following.

Re 18:22

18:22 {14} And the voice of harpers, and musicians, and of pipers, and trumpeters, shall be heard no more at all in thee; and no craftsman, of whatsoever craft [he be], shall be found any more in thee; and the sound of a millstone shall be heard no more at all in thee;

(14) The events are two, and one of them opposite to the other for amplification sake. There shall be no mirth nor joy at all in Babylon, he says in this and the next verse, Re 18:23 but heavy and lamentable things, from the bloody slaughters of the righteous and the vengeance of God coming on it for this.

Re 18:24

18:24 And in her was found the {15} blood of prophets, {16} and of saints, and of all that were slain upon the earth.

(15) That is shed by bloody massacres, and calling for vengeance.
(16) That is, proved and found out, as if God had appointed a just inquiry concerning the impiety, unnaturalness and injustice of these men.

1. God’s Call to Abraham –Why a “Chosen People”?

You may be surprised to learn that the Bible tells us that the great patriarch Abraham, who is often referred to today as the “father of the Jews”, was neither Jewish, nor was he from Israel. He was born and raised in the Mesopotamian city of Ur of the Chaldees (located in modern-day Iraq), and scholars believe he was known as a “Hebrew” because he was the descendant of the grandson of Shem, Eber. (See Genesis 10:24; 11:14,31; 14:13; 15:7.)

Because of Abraham’s faith and love for the one true God, the Lord gave him a special blessing,promising him that He would make a great people out of him and his children, a nation in whom all the nations of the world would be blessed. Scripture tells us that,

“God is no respecter of persons: But in every nation, he that feareth Him, and worketh righteousness, is accepted with Him” (Acts 10:34,35). “Whosoever believeth on Him shall not be ashamed. For there is no difference between the Jew and the Greek: for the same Lord over all is rich unto all that call upon Him. For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved” (Romans 10:11-13).

In other words, God loves all people, regardless of their race or nationality. He is “not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance” and to a saving knowledge of Himself (2 Peter 3:9). And the method God has chosen to reveal Himself and His plan of salvation to Man is by simply using witnesses, people who will be faithful to follow His ways and preach His truth to others.

“For it pleased God by the foolishness of preaching to save them that believe” (1 Corinthians 1:21).

This is why God called and chose Abraham: to raise up a people who would live and preach His truth, to create a nation that would love and serve the one true God, and thus become a Godly example and beacon of hope in a world engulfed in the gross darkness of pagan idolatry, deviltry and superstition. God’s design in establishing a “chosen people” was to make those people a blessing to all the other peoples of the world, that all could come to know Him and His truth. This is borne out in God’s original call to Abraham:

“And I will make of thee a great nation, and I will bless thee, and make thy name great; and thou shalt be a blessing: And I will bless them that bless thee, and curse him that curseth thee: and in thee shall all families of the earth be blessed. . . . In thy seed shall all the nations of the earth be blessed, because thou hast obeyed My voice” (Genesis 12:2,3; 22:18).

Abraham was chosen and blessed by God not merely because he was a flesh and blood descendant of Eber (which is what made him a “Hebrew”), but because of his faith in the Lord!

“And he [Abraham] believed in the Lord; and He [God] counted it to him for righteousness” (Genesis 15:6).

2. Isaac, Jacob and the Children of Israel

The same blessing that God gave Abraham, that in his seed would all nations of the world be blessed, was passed onto his son Isaac (see Genesis 26:3,4), and to his grandson Jacob (see Genesis 28:13,14). Jacob, whose name literally means “supplanter” or “deceiver”, unfortunately lived up to his name (see Genesis 25:29- 34; 27:1-36; 28:13-14; 30:25-43), until he learned some hard lessons, after which he was renamed “Israel”, which means a “prince with God”.

Thus Jacob’s twelve sons were the original children of Israel, and from them sprang the twelve tribes which formed the Hebrew nation. When Jacob’s sons grew so jealous of their younger brother Joseph (whom Jacob favoured) that “they conspired against him, to slay him” (Genesis 37:18), it looked like the end of Joseph and a dark chapter in the early history of the children of Israel. But in His divine providence, God used their enmity towards their younger brother to eventually provide their entire clan with a haven where they would be able to safely multiply and greatly prosper.

Judah (one of the brothers) prevented the other brothers from killing Joseph by proposing, “What profit is it if we slay our brother? Let us sell him to the Ishmeelites [a passing band of Arab merchants] . . . and they sold Joseph for twenty pieces of silver” (Genesis 37:26-28). To hide their deed from their father, they took Joseph’s coat and dipped it in goats’ blood, leading poor old Jacob to believe that his favourite son had been slain and devoured by a wild beast.

The Ishmeelites sold Joseph as a slave in Egypt, where through a series of miracles, God enabled him to rise to a position of great power, second only to the pharaoh. So when severe famine gripped the entire region, Joseph was able to provide his father and estranged brethren a place of refuge in Egypt, where plenteous stores of grain sustained them through the famine. The children of Israel then settled down in the land of Egypt for 430years, during which they multiplied into a nation of millions, prospering in every way “until another king arose which knew not Joseph” (Acts 7:18). God allowed an antagonistic pharaoh to arise who grievously oppressed and exploited them, until they made their dramatic exodus under the dynamic leadership of Moses. (See Acts 7:20-36.)

3. Moses and the Exodus

Unfortunately, Moses had a lot of trouble with these Hebrew refugees from the pharaoh’s injustice. Although they had just witnessed many mighty miracles which God performed in delivering them out of Egypt, they nevertheless doubted and rebelled against the Lord continually, causing Moses no end of grief and heartache.

In fact, shortly after their exodus, when Moses trekked up Mount Sinai where he communed with God for 40 days, receiving the Ten Commandments, the children of Israel forgot all about the Lord and made and worshipped a golden calf (one of the principal gods of Egypt). The Lord was so grieved at the backsliding and idolatry of His “chosen people” that he was ready to utterly destroy them all!–Even if it meant starting all over again with Moses alone, creating a whole new nation to be His witnesses!

“And the Lord said unto Moses, `Go, get thee down; for thy people, which thou broughtest out of the land of Egypt, have corrupted themselves: They have turned aside quickly out of the way which I commanded them: they have made them a molten calf, and have worshipped it, and have sacrificed thereunto, and said, “These be thy gods, O Israel, which have brought thee up out of the land of Egypt.”‘ And the Lord said unto Moses, `I have seen this people, and, behold, it is a stiffnecked people: Now therefore let Me alone, that My wrath may wax hot against them, and that I may consume them: and I will make of thee [Moses] a great nation'” (Exodus 32:7-10).

However, Moses interceded for the people and pled for God to have mercy, and we are told that “the Lord turned from the evil which He thought to do unto His people” (Exodus 32:14).

After their stopover at Sinai, they reached the southern border of Canaan (Palestine), the land that God had promised to give them, and Moses sent out twelve spies to survey the land. When the spies returned from Canaan, most of them gave a discouraging report of giants in the land. (See Numbers 13:31-33.) This caused the fearful and unbelieving children of Israel to murmur and lament that they had ever left Egypt in the first place.

“And all the children of Israel murmured against Moses and against Aaron [Moses’ brother]: and the whole congregation said unto them, `Would God that we had died in the land of Egypt! Or would God we had died in this wilderness! And wherefore hath the Lord brought us unto this land . . . were it not better for us to return into Egypt?’ And they said one to another, `Let us make a captain, and let us return into Egypt'” (Numbers 14:2-4).

God got so upset with these disbelieving, ungrateful children of Israel that He was again ready to absolutely destroy and disown them, and create a whole new nation from Moses.

“And the Lord said unto Moses, `How long will this people provoke Me? And how long will it be ere they believe Me for all the signs which I have shewed among them? I will smite them with the pestilence, and disinherit them, and will make of thee [Moses] a greater nation and mightier than they” (Numbers 14:11,12).

Nevertheless, because of Moses’ fervent prayers and supplications for them, the Lord had mercy and again preserved Israel. (See Numbers 14:19,20.) However, because of their unbelief and murmuring, God ordered them to withdraw from the border of their Promised Land, and sentenced them to 40 years of perpetual wanderings through the harsh and desolate Sinaitic and Jordanian deserts, until the entire unbelieving older generation perished in the wilderness! God told them,

“Your carcasses shall fall in this wilderness; and all that were numbered of you, according to your whole number, from twenty years old and upward, which have murmured against Me. . . . Surely none of the men that came up out of Egypt, from twenty years old and upward, shall see the land which I sware unto Abraham, unto Isaac, and unto Jacob; because they have not wholly followed Me” (Numbers 14:29; 32:11).

Reflecting on the children of Israel’s time in the wilderness, the Psalmist reminds us of how good God was to Hispeople in miraculously delivering them from Egypt and providing for them in the wilderness, yet how unfaithful they were to Him:

“They kept not the covenant of God, and refused to walk in His law; And forgat His works, and His wonders that He had shewed them. Marvellous things did He in the sight of their fathers, in the land of Egypt. . . . He divided the sea, and caused them to pass through; and He made the waters to stand as an heap . . . . How oft did they provoke Him in the wilderness, and grieve Him in the desert! Yea, they turned back and tempted God, and limited the Holy One of Israel. They remembered not His hand, nor the day when He delivered them from the enemy; How He had wrought His signs in Egypt . . . and made His Own people to go forth like sheep, and guided them in the wilderness like a flock. He led them on safely, so that they feared not: but the sea overwhelmed their enemies. Yet they tempted and provoked the most high God, and kept not His testimonies: But turned back, and dealt unfaithfully like their fathers: they were turned aside” (Psalm 78:10-13,40-43,52-57).

4. Apostasy in the Promised Land

After the unbelieving older generation of rebels died off in the wilderness, the younger generation of the children of Israel crossed the River Jordan and occupied the land of Canaan, the Lord going before them and doing great miracles. But sadly, once they had possessed the land, instead of being the shining example to the other nations of the world that God intended for them to be, they soon turned away from the Lord and fell into the same idolatry and spiritual wickedness as the heathen nations around them. For this reason, the Lord frequently let them be conquered and subjugated by the heathen nations.

“And the children of Israel did evil in the sight of the Lord, and served Baalim [devil gods and idols]: And they forsook the Lord God of their fathers, which brought them out of the land of Egypt, and followed other gods, of the gods of the people that were round about them, and bowed themselves unto them, and provoked the Lord to anger. . . . And the anger of the Lord was hot against Israel, and He delivered them into the hands of spoilers that spoiled them, and He sold them into the hands of their enemies round about, so that they could not any longer stand before their enemies” (Judges 2:11-14).

To try to turn the hearts of His people away from idolatry and back to Himself, the Lord raised up leaders known as “judges”.

“Nevertheless the Lord raised up judges, which delivered them out of the hand of those that spoiled them. And yet they would not hearken unto their judges, but they went a whoring after other gods, and bowed themselves unto them: they turned quickly out of the way . . . they ceased not from their own doings, nor from their stubborn way” (Judges 2:16,17,19).

5. The Kingdom Established: Theocracy Abandoned

During the 300-year historical period known as the “Time of the Judges”, the children of Israel were a loosely knit federation of tribes, with no central governmental authority. Their form of government was a theocracy, meaning that God Himself was supposed to be the direct Ruler of His people, through His judges and prophets. However, as they fell away from the Lord and grew envious of the heathen nations around them, they petitioned their final judge, the prophet Samuel, to appoint them a king.

“All the elders of Israel gathered themselves together, and came to Samuel . . . and said unto him . . . `now make us a king to judge us like all the nations.’ And the Lord said unto Samuel, `Hearken unto the voice of the people in all that they say unto thee: for they have not rejected thee, but they have rejected Me, that I should not reign over them. According to all the works which they have done since the day that I brought them up out of Egypt even unto this day, wherewith they have forsaken Me, and served other gods, so do they also unto thee” (1 Samuel 8:4-8).

Although Samuel protested and warned the people that it was not God’s will or plan for them to try to make themselves like the ungodly nations around them, we are told:

“Nevertheless the people refused to obey the voice of Samuel; and they said, `Nay; but we will have a king over us; that we also may be like all the nations; and that our king may judge us, and go out before us, and fight our battles'” (1 Samuel 8:19,20).

6. The Kingdom Divided

After becoming a kingdom, the children of Israel united under their first two kings, Saul and then David. However, because David’s son, Solomon, departed from the Lord, worshipping the pagan devil gods of the heathen (see 1 Kings 11:4-10), as a judgement, the Lord let the united kingdom fall apart, for as soon as Solomon died, the ten northern tribes seceded from the central government of Jerusalem, forming the northern kingdom, called “Israel”. The remaining two tribes of Judah and Benjamin formed the southern kingdom, called “Judah”.

The official state religion of the northern kingdom was the same idolatry which had so infuriated Moses and the Lord in the wilderness, the worship of the golden calf. The southern kingdom, Judah, professed to still be true to Jehovah, but most of their kings tolerated or promoted idolatry and deviltry (including the vile Canaanite religion of Baal worship, which was particularly abhorrent to the Lord, as its practice included the human sacrifice of small children).

“Yea, they sacrificed their sons and their daughters unto devils, and shed innocent blood, even the blood of their sons and of their daughters, whom they sacrificed unto the idols of Canaan: and the land was polluted with blood. Thus were they defiled with their own works, and went a whoring with their own inventions. Therefore was the wrath of the Lord kindled against His people, insomuch that He abhorred His own inheritance. And He gave them into the hand of the heathen; and they that hated them ruled over them” (Psalm 106:37-41).

Although God sent prophet after prophet to warn the kings and the people of both kingdoms to turn back to Him lest He allow the heathen to invade and overcome them, few of them hearkened to or believed the Lord’s voice, but instead despised and rejected His messengers, thus the judgements of God fell.

“Yet the Lord testified against Israel, and against Judah, by all the prophets, and by all the seers, saying, `Turn ye from your evil ways, and keep My commandments and My statutes, according to all the law which I commanded your fathers, and which I sent to you by My servants the prophets.’ Notwithstanding they would not hear, but hardened their necks, like to the neck of their fathers, that did not believe in the Lord their God” (2 Kings 17:13,14).

“Moreover all the chief of the priests, and the people, transgressed very much after all the abominations of the heathen. . . . And the Lord God of their fathers sent to them by His messengers, rising up betimes, and sending; because He had compassion on His people, and on His dwelling place: But they mocked the messengers of God, and despised His words, and misused His prophets, until the wrath of the Lord arose against His people, till there was no remedy” (2 Chronicles 36:14-16).

“And I will deliver them to be removed to all the kingdoms of the earth, to be a curse, and an astonishment, and an hissing, and a reproach, among all the nations whither I have driven them: Because they have not hearkened to My words, saith the Lord, which I sent unto them by My servants the prophets, rising up early and sending them; but ye would not hear, saith the Lord” (Jeremiah 29:18,19).

7. Captivity and Restoration

The apostate northern kingdom was conquered and destroyed by Assyria around 721 B.C., and the southern kingdom was conquered and destroyed by Babylon in 586 B.C., at which time the city of Jerusalem and Solomon’s temple were utterly demolished. After being carried away into 70 years of captivity by Babylon, the “Jews” (a nickname given them by the Babylonians, since those conquered by Babylon were from Judah) were allowed by Cyrus the Great, king of Persia (who had since conquered Babylon) to return to Palestine to rebuild Jerusalem and their temple.

Although a great moral and religious revival took place under the inspired leadership of men like Zerubbabel, Ezra and Nehemiah, in a short while the people settled down and again began to forget their God, thus He again allowed them to be subjugated by the heathen. The Lord grew so weary with His people and their perpetual backsliding that in the final book of the Old Testament He told them that He would no longer accept their offerings, but that the Gentiles would become His people:

“I have no pleasure in you [Israel], saith the Lord of hosts, neither will I accept an offering at your hand. For from the rising of the sun even unto the going down of the same My name shall be great among theGentiles; and in every place incense shall be offered unto My name, and a pure offering: for My name shall be great among the heathen” (Malachi 1:10,11).

8. Salvation Promised for the Gentiles

God, knowing all things, had foreseen the Jews’ rebellion against Him way back when the nation of Israel was first being formed in the wilderness with Moses. Through His prophet Moses, He told them that the time would come when He would raise up another people.

“But Jeshurun [Israel] waxed fat, and kicked [rebelled] . . . then he forsook God which made him, and lightly esteemed the Rock of his salvation. They provoked Him to jealousy with strange gods, with abominations provoked they Him to anger. And when the Lord saw it, He abhorred them and He said, `I will hide My face from them, I will see what their end shall be: for they are a very froward [rebellious and obstinate] generation, children in whom is no faith. . . . I will move them to jealousy with those which are not a people [the Gentiles]; I will provoke them to anger with a foolish nation'” (Deuteronomy 32:15-21).

The prophet Isaiah was even more explicit in his warnings to Israel, showing them that the Lord was so wearied with the self-righteous hypocrisy of Israel, that He was going to turn to the Gentiles, a nation which had not been called by His name.

“I am sought of them that asked not for Me; I am found of them that sought Me not: I said, `Behold Me, behold Me,’ unto a nation that was not called by My name [the Gentiles]. I have spread out My hands all the day unto a rebellious people [the Jews], which walketh in a way that was not good, after their own thoughts; which say, `Stand by thyself, come not near to me; for I am holier than thou.’ These are a smoke in My nose, a fire that burneth all the day. . . . And ye shall leave your name for a curse unto My chosen: for the Lord God shall slay thee, and call His servants by another name” (Isaiah 65:1,2,5,15).

The prophet Hosea confirmed very clearly that God was going to raise up a new people unto Himself:

“I will have mercy upon her that had not obtained mercy; and I will say to them which were not My people, `Thou art My people’; and they shall say, `Thou art my God'” (Hosea 2:23).

Furthermore, regarding Israel and her coming fate, Hosea prophesied,

“My God will cast them away, because they did not hearken unto Him: and they shall be wanderers among the nations” (Hosea 9:17).

B. The New Testament

9. The Messiah’s Arrival and Rejection

IN THE 400 YEARS THAT PASSED between the last of the Old Testament prophets and the beginning of the New Testament, the Jews of Judah were subjugated by the Persians, the Greeks, and lastly, the Romans. The people had long awaited a promised Messiah, and most envisioned him as a great King who would come to liberate them from the political tyranny of the Roman pagans and re-establish their nation as a strong and united kingdom, as it had been almost 1,000 years earlier under King David.

When the time came that the Messiah, Jesus Christ, arrived, He preached that the Kingdom of God was a spiritual Kingdom, and that to enter it required faith.–Something that most of the Jews had been sorely lacking in.

When Jesus came, the very Son of God, He ministered primarily to the Jews, proclaiming,

“I am not sent but unto the lost sheep of the house of Israel” (Matthew 15:24).

However, sad to say, they did not recognise or receive their Messiah:

“He came unto His Own [people], and His Own received Him not” (John 1:11).

10. The Jews’ Forfeiture of the Kingdom

Throughout the Old Testament, God likened His Kingdom, His people, unto a vineyard, which He tends and cares for:

“For the vineyard of the Lord of hosts is the house of Israel, and the men of Judah his pleasant plant” (Isaiah 5:7).

In His parable of the wicked husbandmen (farmers), Jesus succinctly described the Jews’ centuries-long rejection of God’s messengers, culminating in their rejection of His Own Son, their Messiah.

“There was a certain householder, which planted a vineyard, and hedged it round about, and digged a winepress in it, and built a tower, and let it out to husbandmen, and went into a far country: And when the time of the fruit drew near, he sent his servants to the husbandmen, that they might receive the fruits of it. And the husbandmen took his servants, and beat one, and killed another, and stoned another. Again, he sent other servants more than the first: and they did unto them likewise. But last of all he sent unto them his son, saying, `They will reverence my son.’ But when the husbandmen saw the son, they said among themselves, `This is the heir; come, let us kill him, and let us seize on his inheritance.’ And they caught him, and cast him out of the vineyard, and slew him.”

Jesus then asked His listeners a most sombre question:

“When the lord therefore of the vineyard cometh, what will he do unto those husbandmen? They say unto him, `He will miserably destroy those wicked men, and will let out his vineyard unto other husbandmen, which shall render him the fruits in their seasons.’ Jesus saith unto them, `Did ye never read in the Scriptures, “The stone which the builders rejected, the same is become the head of the corner: this is the Lord’s doing, and it is marvellous in our eyes?” Therefore say I unto you, The Kingdom of God shall be taken from you, and given to a nation bringing forth the fruits thereof'” (Matthew 21:33-43).

This shocking message, that the stewardship of God’s Kingdom on Earth was going to be transferred from the Jewish nation to another “nation” or people, meaning the Christians, reverberates throughout the New Testament. Jesus’ words after an encounter with a sincere and believing Roman soldier who had asked Him to heal his servant, make it very clear that flesh and blood Israel had forfeited the blessing she once possessed:

“Verily I say unto you, I have not found so great faith [as the Roman centurion manifested], no, not in Israel. And I say unto you, that many shall come from the east and west [Gentiles from outside of Israel], and shall sit down with Abraham, and Isaac, and Jacob, in the Kingdom of Heaven. But the children of the Kingdom [the Jews] shall be cast out into outer darkness: there shall be weeping and gnashing of teeth” (Matthew 8:10-12).

Needless to say, such a message incurred the wrath and enmity of the influential Jewish leaders upon Jesus! While the Scriptures tell us that “the common people heard Him gladly” (Mark 12:37), the response of the jealous Jewish religious leaders, the scribes and the Pharisees, was quite the opposite: “And they were filled with madness, and communed one with another what they might do to Jesus. . . . and they sought to slay Him” (Luke 6:11; John 5:16).

11. A Question of Fatherhood

When the Pharisees argued with Jesus that because they were the chosen seed of Abraham, they had no need for Him and the “freedom” He promised those who would receive His truth, His startling response so infuriated them that they “took up stones to cast at Him” (John 8:59).

“[Jesus said:] `I speak that which I have seen with My Father: and ye do that which ye have seen with your father.’ They answered and said unto him, `Abraham is our father.’ Jesus saith unto them, `If ye were Abraham’s children, ye would do the works of Abraham. But now ye seek to kill Me, a man that hath told you the truth which I have heard of God: this did not Abraham. Ye do the deeds of your father.’ Then said they to him, `We be not born of fornication; we have one Father, even God.’ Jesus said unto them, `If God were your Father, ye would love Me: for I proceeded forth and came from God; neither came I of Myself, but He sent Me. Why do ye not understand My speech? Even because ye cannot hear My word. Ye are of your father the Devil, and the lusts of your father ye will do! He was a murderer from the beginning, and abode not in the truth, because thereis no truth in him. When he speaketh a lie, he speaketh of his own: for he is a liar, and the father of it'” (John 8:38-44).

This highly charged denunciation of the Christ-rejecting Jewish leaders brings to mind a similar passage from Revelation, where the Lord was decrying the hypocrisy of those who claimed to be God’s chosen seed of Abraham, but who were, as Jesus said, “of their father the Devil”:

“I know the blasphemy of them which say they are Jews, and are not, but are the synagogue of Satan” (Revelation 2:9).

12. “How Often Would I Have Gathered Thee!”

Remember, from the very beginning God promised Abraham that his children were to be a blessing to all nations, all peoples, so that all Mankind could come to a knowledge of the true God. For centuries God tried to use the Jews for this purpose, sending them His prophets to guide them in the right way, but they persistently rebelled against the Lord and went their own way, persecuting and rejecting His messengers. As Jesus brought out in the parable of the wicked husbandmen, when God, in a final act of love, sent His Own beloved Son, and the keepers of the vineyard murdered Him, this would be their crowning crime! By rejecting and crucifying God’s Son, Jesus, Israel forever forfeited her claim to any special right to God’s blessings, until she repents and recognises and returns to the Messiah she rejected! Jesus made this clear in His final lament over the “City of David”:

“O Jerusalem, Jerusalem, thou that killest the prophets, and stonest them which are sent unto thee, how often would I have gathered thy children together, even as a hen gathereth her chickens under her wings, and ye would not! Behold, your house is left unto you desolate. For I say unto you, Ye shall not see Me henceforth, till ye shall say, `Blessed is He that cometh in the name of the Lord'” (Matthew 23:37-39).

Stephen, the first recorded martyr of the Early Church, castigated the Jewish religious leaders for their persistent rejection of God’s messengers and their crucifixion of Christ by telling them,

“Ye stiffnecked and uncircumcised in heart and ears, ye do always resist the Holy Ghost: as your fathers did, so do ye. Which of the prophets have not your fathers persecuted? And they have slain them which shewed before of the coming of the Just One; of whom ye have been now the betrayers and murderers!” (Acts 7:51,52).

The Apostle Paul also made it clear that the reason God’s blessing was withdrawn from the Jews was because of their own rejection of His Word and Truth. This is why God had to turn to another “nation” which would love and serve Him and be His witnesses to the world.–The true Christians!

“Then Paul and Barnabas waxed bold, and said, `It was necessary that the Word of God should first have been spoken to you [the Jews]: but seeing ye put it from you, and judge yourselves unworthy of everlasting life, lo, we turn to the Gentiles'” (Acts 13:46).

Please bear in mind that all of the apostles were Jewish. Their words and attitude towards the Jewish leaders who rejected Christ and the Gospel were not in any way “anti-Semitic”. The apostles were simply, and no doubt painfully, facing the fact that many of their own people had failed to receive their own Messiah, and that in rejecting God’s Son, they were rejecting the very God they professed to believe in!

“Who is a liar but he that denieth that Jesus is the Christ? He is antichrist, that denieth the Father and the Son. Whosoever denieth the Son, the same hath not the Father: but he that acknowledgeth the Son hath the Father also” (1 John 2:22,23).

The Apostle Paul thus describes the sad state of his Jewish counterparts who refused their Messiah and were ceaselessly persecuting him and his fellow Christians:

“The Jews . . . both killed the Lord Jesus, and their own prophets, and have persecuted us; and they please not God, and are contrary to all men: Forbidding us to speak to the Gentiles that they might be saved, to fill up their sins alway: for the wrath is come upon them to the uttermost” (1 Thessalonians 2:14-16).

13. What about God’s Promises to Abraham?

If the flesh and blood Jews were no longer to be the chosen people of God, what about all of the promises that God made to Abraham? Did God break His Word? If the Jews were to ultimately be “cast out” as Jesus said, then had God’s plan failed? The answer, of course, is no, God’s plan didn’t fail! His promises to Abraham have been fulfilled absolutely. Here’s how:

The Scriptures tell us that “without faith it is impossible to please God” (Hebrews 11:6). As you may recall, this is why God blessed Abraham in the first place, “And he [Abraham] believed in the Lord; and He counted it to him for righteousness” (Genesis 15:6). Abraham was blessed and chosen of God because of his faith. The flesh and blood Jews were ultimately rejected by God because of their lack of faith! Therefore, Abraham was not so much the father of the Jews as he was the father of the faithful, those who have faith. Thus, Abraham’s “seed” today are all of those–whether they are born Jew or Gentile–who believe in and receive God’s Son, Jesus Christ the Messiah!

“Know ye therefore that they which are of faith, the same are the children of Abraham. And the Scripture, foreseeing that God would justify the heathen through faith, preached before the Gospel unto Abraham, saying, `In thee shall all nations be blessed.’ So then they which be of faith are blessed with faithful Abraham. . . . That the blessing of Abraham might come on the Gentiles through Jesus Christ; that we might receive the promise of the Spirit through faith” (Galatians 3:7-9,14).

In other words, God is saying that His children, His Israel, the “seed” or children of Abraham in whom all nations are blessed, are not merely those who are born of a certain race, but all of those who have given their hearts to Him by faith in His Son, Jesus.

“For they are not all Israel, which are of Israel: Neither, because they are the seed of Abraham, are they all children. . . . That is, they which are the children of the flesh, these are not the children of God” (Romans 9:6- 8).

“For he is not a Jew, which is one outwardly; neither is that circumcision, which is outward in the flesh: But he is a Jew, which is one inwardly; and circumcision is that of the heart, in the spirit, and not in the letter; whose praise is not of men, but of God” (Romans 2:28,29).

Once we have received Jesus and are born again of His Spirit, we are liberated from the fleshly bounds of race and nationality:

“There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither bond nor free, there is neither male nor female: for ye are all one in Christ Jesus. And if ye be Christ’s, then are ye Abraham’s seed, and heirs according to the promise” (Galatians 3:28,29).

–Christians!

14. Good News about God’s New Nation!

We saw earlier in our study of Old Testament Scriptures that God foresaw the day that flesh and blood Israel would refuse to receive their Messiah. King David and the prophet Isaiah both prophesied that the coming Messiah was the foundation stone which flesh and blood Israel would reject and stumble upon:

“The stone which the builders refused is become the head stone of the corner [chief cornerstone]. This is the Lord’s doing; it is marvellous in our eyes!” (Psalm 118:22,23).

“Thus saith the Lord God, `Behold, I lay in Zion for a foundation a stone, a tried stone, a precious corner stone, a sure foundation'” (Isaiah 28:16).

–Jesus!

“The Lord of hosts Himself . . . shall be for a sanctuary; but for a stone of stumbling and for a rock of offence to both the houses of Israel . . . and many among them shall stumble, and fall, and be broken” (Isaiah 8:13-15).

It was evident to the apostles that Jesus was the fulfilment of these Old Testament prophecies. Peter wrote:

“It is contained in the Scripture, `Behold, I lay in Zion a chief corner stone, elect, precious: and he thatbelieveth on Him shall not be confounded.’ Unto you therefore which believe, He is precious: but unto them which be disobedient [disbelieve], the stone which the builders disallowed [rejected], the same is made the head of the corner, and a stone of stumbling, and a rock of offence, even to them which stumble at the Word” (1 Peter 2:6-8).

In the next verse of this passage Peter concludes that God has a new “Chosen People”, a new nation whom He has blessed and called to be His witnesses.

“But ye [born-again Christians] are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, an holy nation, a peculiar people; that ye should show forth the praises of Him who hath called you out of darkness into His marvellous light: Which in time past were not a people, but are now the people of God!–Which had not obtained mercy, but now have obtained mercy” (1 Peter 2:9-10).

So the sad news of God withdrawing His special blessing and calling from flesh and blood Israel is eclipsed by the tremendously good news that He has now called and brought into being a New Nation, a new “Chosen People”, whom He has called to echo His praises in the light of His Love! For though He “came unto His Own [the Jews], and His Own received Him not” (John 1:11), the wonderful good news is spelled out clearly in the next two verses:

“But as many as received Him [Jesus], to them gave He power to become the sons of God; even to them that believe on His name. Which were born, not of blood, nor of the will of the flesh, nor of the will of Man, but of God” (John 1:12,13).

God is still “not willing that any should perish” (2 Peter 3:9), and He yearns for all men, whatever their race or background, to come to personally know Him and His Love. His arms and His Kingdom are open wide to anyone–Jew or Gentile–who will simply believe on His Son Jesus and receive Him into their lives.

“For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life” (John 3:16).

God bless you with His Love and salvation! If you have not yet received the Messiah, the “Anointed One”, Jesus the Christ, the Son of the living God into your heart, simply pray and ask Him into your heart today, and He will come in, and you too will become one of God’s chosen people, a citizen of the eternal Kingdom of Heaven! He loves you!

Copyright © 1998 by The Family

(Note: This article is not currently an official Family International publication)

Charles Chiniquy

The original title of this post was, “Insights from the Roman Catholic Bishop of Chicago of 1850 how the Catholic Church took over America”. I first posted it on April 9, 2014. It’s an excerpt from chapter 47 of Charles Chiniquy’s classic book, “50 Years in the Church of Rome” I am reposting it now with more information because I consider this extremely important history that most Americans don’t know. I shared it a few weeks ago with a member of the Republican committee to re-elect the former Guamanian governor, Felix Camacho. He was very interested to hear it.

Synopsis

In 1850, Roman Catholic Priest Charles Chinquy from Quebec Canada was encouraged by the Bishop of Chicago to lead a group of Catholic immigrants to pioneer a settlement in the farm country of Illinois. The purpose was to populate the fertile US states of Illinois, Iowa, Missouri, and Kansas with Roman Catholic farmers. There were two reasons for this.

1. So that Catholics remain united together in settlements so that they are not so easily influenced by the Protestants and Protestant theology in order for them to remain in the Roman Catholic Church.

2. By populating the rich midwest US farmland with Catholics, the Roman Catholic Church will control the breadbasket of the USA and eventually the American government!

The settlement Charles Chiniquy pioneered, St. Anne Illinois, exists to this day. It’s about 40 miles south of where I was raised in Chicago. I never knew about St. Anne or Charles Chiniquy when I was young. I sure didn’t hear about him in the Chicago Catholic elementary school I attended! As a Catholic priest, he suffered much abuse from other priests and bishops of the Church and eventually left it to become a Protestant minister. And to a man, his entire parish of St. Anne followed him and left the Church of Rome with him! You can read about that on this website: “Hurrah for St. Anne, the grave of the tyranny of the Bishops of Rome in America!”

Introduction to the characters.

“Charles Chiniquy (1809-1899) was a Canadian Presbyterian convert from Roman Catholicism, born at Kamouraska, Quebec, Canada to Roman Catholic parents, and studied at the college of Nicolet, Canada, professor of belles-lettres there after graduation until 1833. in 1833 ordained a Roman Catholic priest, and until 1846 was vicar and curate in the province of Quebec where he established the first temperance (anti-drinking alcohol) society, winning the title “Apostle of Temperence of Canada.” In 1851 established an extensive Roman Catholic colony at Kankakee, Illinois. In 1858 left the church of Rome and joined the Canadian Presbyterian Church taking his congregation at Kankakee with him. Lectured in England and in Australia (1878-1882). Published a number of books and tracts on temperance and anti-Romanism, some of which became very popular and were translated into several languages.” (From “The Wycliffe Biographical Dictionary of the Church,” page 90, Elgin S. Moyer, 1982, ©Moody Press, Chicago, IL)

James Oliver Van de Velde (April 3, 1795 – November 13, 1855) was a U.S. Catholic bishop born in Belgium. He served as the second Roman Catholic Bishop of Chicago between 1849 and 1853. He is the Bishop who wrote the following letter to Charles Chiniquy in 1850.

Letter from the Rev. Bishop Vandeveld, of Chicago to Charles Chiniquy

On the 15th of December, 1850, I received the following letter:

“Chicago, Ill., December 1st, 1850.

“Rev. Father Chiniquy:

“Apostle of Temperance of Canada.

“Dear Sir: When I was in Canada, last fall, I intended to confer with you on a very important subject, but you were then working in the diocese of Boston, and my limited time prevented me from going so far to meet you. You are aware that the lands of the State of Illinois and the whole valley of the Mississippi are among the richest and most fertile of the world. In a near future, those regions, which are now a comparative wilderness, will be the granary, not only of the United States, but of the whole world; and those who will possess them will not only possess the very heart and arteries of this young and already so great republic, but will become its rulers.

“It is our intention, without noise, to take possession of those vast and magnificent regions of the west in the name and for the benefit of our holy Church. Our plan to attain that object, is as sure as easy. There is, every year, an increasing tide of emigration from the Roman Catholic regions of Europe and Canada towards the United States. Unfortunately, till now, our emigrants have blindly scattered themselves among the Protestant populations, which too often absorb them and destroy their faith.

“Why should we not direct their steps to the same spot? Why should we not, for instance, induce them to come and take possession of these fertile states of Illinois, Missouri, Iowa, Kansas, ect. They can get those lands now, at a nominal price. If we succeed, as I hope we will, our holy Church will soon count her children here by ten and twenty millions, and through their numbers, their wealth and unity, they will have such a weight in the balance of power that they will rule everything.

“The Protestants, always divided among themselves, will never form any strong party without the help of the united vote of our Catholic people; and that party alone, which will ask and get our help by yielding to our just demands, will rule the country. Then, in reality, though not in appearance, our holy Church will rule the United States, as she is called by our Saviour Himself to rule the whole world. There is, today, a wave of emigrants from Canada towards the United States, which, if not stopped or well directed, is threatening to throw the good French Canadian people into the mire of Protestantism. Your countrymen, when once mixed with the numberless sects which try to attract them, are soon shaken in their faith. Their children sent to Protestant schools, will be unable to defend themselves against the wily and united efforts made to pervert them.

“But put yourself at the head of the emigrants from Canada, France and Belgium; prevent them from settling any longer among the Protestants, by inducing them to follow you to Illinois, and with them, you will soon see here, a Roman Catholic people, whose number, wealth and influence will amaze the world. God Almighty has wonderfully blessed your labours in Canada in that holy cause of temperance. But now the work is done, the same Great God presents to your Christian ambition a not less great and noble work for the rest of your life. Make use of your great influence over your countrymen to prevent them from scattering any longer among Protestants, by inducing them to come here, in Illinois. You will then lay the foundation of a Roman Catholic French people, whose piety, unity, wealth and number will soon renew and revive, on this continent, the past and fading glories of the Church of France.

“We have already, at Bourbonnais, a fine colony of French Canadians. They long to see and hear you. Come and help me to make that comparatively small, though thriving people, grow with the immigrants from the French-speaking countries of Europe and America, till it covers the whole territory of Illinois with its sturdy sons and pious daughters. I will ask the Pope to make you my coadjutor, and you will soon become my successor, for I already feel too weak and unhealthy to bear alone the burden of my too large diocese.

“Please consider what I propose to you before God, and answer me. But be kind enough to consider this overture as strictly confidential between you and me, till we have brought our plans into execution.

“Truly yours, Olvi Vandeveld,
“Bishop of Chicago.”

(End of excerpt. You can read the entire chapter.)

Back to the 21st century: Ask yourself, did Bishop Vandeveld’s plan work? Catholics now outnumber any single Protestant denomination in the Senate and House of Representatives! Please see Catholics rise to prominence in Congress. This would have been unthinkable in the 19th century! Only a little over one hundred years ago, the Church of Rome was considered by Protestant Christians to be the enemy of American liberties! When you consider that the other Protestant denominations do not work with each other, it means the Vatican has quite a bit of control over the US government through their loyal members of the Church of Rome! The Supreme Court alone, six of out nine justices, are Catholics!

More stories from Charles Chiniquy

The words, “ten horns” appear exactly nine times in nine verses in the Bible, and only in the books of Daniel and Revelation.

Daniel 7:7  After this I saw in the night visions, and behold a fourth beast (the Roman Empire), dreadful and terrible, and strong exceedingly; and it had great iron teeth: it devoured and brake in pieces, and stamped the residue with the feet of it: and it was diverse from all the beasts that were before it; and it had ten horns.
Daniel 7:20  And of the ten horns that were in his head, and of the other which came up, and before whom three fell; even of that horn that had eyes, and a mouth that spake very great things, whose look was more stout than his fellows (the Antichrist).
Daniel 7:24  And the ten horns out of this kingdom are ten kings that shall arise: and another shall rise after them; and he shall be diverse from the first, and he shall subdue three kings.
Revelation 12:3  And there appeared another wonder in heaven; and behold a great red dragon, having seven heads (the 7 empires from Egypt to Rome) and ten horns, and seven crowns upon his heads.
Revelation 13:1  ¶And I stood upon the sand of the sea, and saw a beast rise up out of the sea, having seven heads and ten horns, and upon his horns ten crowns, and upon his heads the name of blasphemy.
Revelation 17:3  So he carried me away in the spirit into the wilderness: and I saw a woman sit upon a scarlet coloured beast, full of names of blasphemy, having seven heads and ten horns.
Revelation 17:7  ¶And the angel said unto me, Wherefore didst thou marvel? I will tell thee the mystery of the woman, and of the beast that carrieth her, which hath the seven heads and ten horns.
Revelation 17:12  And the ten horns which thou sawest are ten kings, which have received no kingdom as yet; but receive power as kings one hour with the beast.
Revelation 17:16  And the ten horns which thou sawest upon the beast, these shall hate the whore (the Roman Catholic Church system?), and shall make her desolate and naked, and shall eat her flesh, and burn her with fire.

The Jesuit controlled Illuminati has decided the world into 10 economic regions! Are not these the Ten Horns of Daniel and Revelation? I see no reason not to think so.

Countries that comprise the Ten Horns

I cannot remember from where I got this information from. It originally had numbers but those numbers did not correspond with the numbers on the picture above. I think which number is not as important as the fact there are indeed 10 regions.

NAFTA	EU	AFEC	M.E.	W.Asia /E.Europe	Central Asia	ASEAN	Orient	S.Africa	S.America
U.S.A.	U.K.	Australia	Turkey	Most Balkan States	Russia	Thailand	Japan	Union of S.Africa	Venezuela
Canada	France	New Zealand	Syria	Poland	Armenia	Bangladesh		Nigeria	Brazil
Mexico	Germany	China	Jordan	Romania	Georgia	Cambodia		Ethopia	Chile
Central America	Italy	South Korea	Israel	Hungary	Azerbaijan	India		Belgian	Columbia
	Belgium	Indonesia	Lebanon	Bulgaria	Cuba	Laos		Uganda	Guatemala
	Denmark	North Korea	Egypt	Czechoslovakia		Vietnam		Kenya	Nicaragua
	Ireland	Mongolia	S. Arabia	Serbia		Myanmar		Somali	Yucatan
	Spain			Albania		Nepal		Angola	Paraguay
	Netherlands		Maghreb Union	Estonia		Pakistan		Zimbawe	Argentina
	Greece		Libya	Latvia		Afganistan		Mozambique	Bolivia
	Luxembourg		Algeria	Lithuania		Iran		Madagascar	Peru
	Portugal		Tunisia			Iraq			Ecuador
	Austria		Morocco						Uraguay
	Finland		Sudan						Guinness
	Sweden

The most interesting thing for me about this chart is that Japan has a region all to its own! Could it be because Japan is the only good economy based on hard work left in the world?

A merry heart doeth good like a medicine: but a broken spirit drieth the bones. – Proverbs 17:22

Did you know God has a sense of humor? I thought it was pretty funny that God used an angel to free the apostles from the prison they were sent to by the Sadducees – very sect that denied the existence of angels!

For the Sadducees say that there is no resurrection, neither angel, nor spirit: but the Pharisees confess both. – Acts 23:8

Acts 5:17  ¶Then the high priest rose up, and all they that were with him, (which is the sect of the Sadducees,) and were filled with indignation,
18  And laid their hands on the apostles, and put them in the common prison.
19  But the angel of the Lord by night opened the prison doors, and brought them forth, and said,
20  Go, stand and speak in the temple to the people all the words of this life.

The world has become so bad it sickens me to listen to the news and current events. Natural disasters such as floods, tornados, and hurricanes are blamed on climate change when the real reason is the judgments of God for moral depravity and rejection of the Bible as the Word of God. Talk about mind manipulation! Government agents call it, “perception management”. And I’m talking about news from both liberal and conservative news sources. It’s just so depressing. BUT thankfully we have the promises of God to know the nonsense will soon come to an end!

Psalms 37:1  Fret not thyself because of evildoers, neither be thou envious against the workers of iniquity.
2  For they shall soon be cut down like the grass, and wither as the green herb.

To lift our spirits, I found this article from my old website on kt70.com/~jamesjpn and thought to republish it. Many of the stories are from the time George W. Bush was president during the invasion of Afghanistan and Iraq.

Click on the link to go to the story that catches your interest.

• Up the Proverbial Creek
• Banking by Senior Citizen
• The Two Dollar Bill – This is good! A real classic funny! It could have happened!
• Help with adopting kittens
• Meals on Wheels
• US Politics for Dummies
• Mutant Marsupials Take Up Arms Against Australian Air Force
• A little boy’s letter to God
• Weapons of Math Instruction
• A possible scenario of ordering pizza in the future
• A humorous comparison of cats and dogs
• Why did the chicken cross the road?
• A conversation in the Oval Office 🙂
• THE shepherd and the economist
• THE LAWYER & THE LITTLE BOY
• McDonnell-Douglas survey — A satire
• Advice from Mom
• The Perfect Joke
• The Recruitment
• Computer Jokes
• Elevator Experience
• Heaven in Hell
• NASA & the Navajo
• If Noah had lived in the United States in the year 2001….
• A problem with communication
• Comparison of Religious Theory in the Late 20th Century
• The Yuppie
• A letter from grandma
• After a partying weekend….
• Genie on the beach
• Joining a church joke You won’t forget this one!
• Answering Machine Messages
• Brief and to the Point
• Taking it with you  — Why it’s not even worth it if you could.
• Look Out Below — How to break bad news easily
• The Lost Chapter of Genesis — Little decisions ARE important!

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Up the Proverbial Creek

A Japanese company (Toyota) and an American company (General Motors) decided to have a canoe race on the Missouri River. Both teams practiced long and hard to reach their peak performance before the race.

On the big day, the Japanese won by a mile.

The Americans, very discouraged and depressed, decided to investigate the reason for the crushing defeat. A management team made up of senior management was formed to investigate and recommend appropriate action. Their conclusion was the Japanese had 8 people rowing and 1 person steering, while the American team had 8 people steering and 1 person rowing.

Feeling a deeper study was in order, American management hired a consulting company and paid them a large amount of money for a second opinion. They advised, of course, that too many people were steering the boat, while not enough people were rowing.

Not sure of how to utilize that information, but wanting to prevent another loss to the Japanese, the rowing team’s management structure was totally reorganized to 4 steering supervisors, 3 area steering superintendents and 1 assistant superintendent steering manager. They also implemented a new performance system that would give the 1 person rowing the boat greater incentive to work harder. It was called the ‘Rowing Team Quality First Program,’ with meetings, dinners and free pens and a certificate of completion for the rower. There was discussion of getting new paddles, canoes and other equipment, extra vacation days for practices and bonuses.

The next year the Japanese won by two miles.

Humiliated, the American management laid off the rower (a reduction in workforce) for poor performance, halted development of a new canoe, sold the paddles, and canceled all capital investments for new equipment. The money saved was distributed to the Senior Executives as bonuses and the next year’s racing team was “out-sourced” to India …

Sadly, the End.

However, sad, but oh so true! Here’s something else to think about:

Ford has spent the last thirty years moving all its factories out of the US, claiming they can’t make money paying American wages. Toyota has spent the last thirty years building more than a dozen plants inside the US .

The last quarter’s results:

Toyota makes 4 billion in profits while Ford racked up 9 billion in losses. Ford folks are still scratching their heads.

IF THIS WASN’T SO SAD IT MIGHT BE FUNNY!

Back to joke index

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Banking by a Senior Citizen

A 98-year-old woman wrote this to her bank. The bank manager thought it amusing enough to have it published in the New York Times.

Dear Sir:

I am writing to thank you for bouncing my check with which I endeavored to pay my plumber last month.

By my calculations, three ‘nanoseconds’ must have elapsed between his presenting the check and the arrival in my account of the funds needed to honor it. I refer, of course, to the automatic monthly deposit of my entire salary, an arrangement which, I admit, has been in place for only eight years.

You are to be commended for seizing that brief window of opportunity, and also for debiting my account $30 by way of penalty for the inconvenience caused to your bank.

My thankfulness springs from the manner in which this incident has caused me to rethink my errant financial ways.

I noticed that whereas I personally attend to your telephone calls and letters, when I try to contact you, I am confronted by the impersonal, overcharging, pre-recorded, faceless entity which your bank has become.

From now on, I, like you, choose only to deal with a flesh-and-blood person. My mortgage and loan payments will therefore and hereafter no longer be automatic, but will arrive at your bank by check, addressed personally and confidentially to an employee at your bank whom you must nominate.

Be aware that it is an offense under the Postal Act for any other person to open such an envelope. Please find attached an Application Contact Status which I require your chosen employee to complete. I am sorry it runs to eight pages, but in order that I know as much about him or her as your bank knows about me, there is no alternative. Please note that all copies of his or her medical history must be countersigned by a Notary, and the mandatory details of his/her financial situation (income, debts, assets and liabilities) must be accompanied by documented proof.

In due course, I will issue your employee with a PIN number which he/she must quote in dealings with me. I regret that it cannot be shorter than 28 digits but, again, I have modeled it on the number of button presses required of me to access my account balance on your phone bank service. As they say, imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.
Let me level the playing field even further.
When you call me, press buttons as follows:

1– To make an appointment to see me.
2– To query a missing payment.
3– To transfer the call to my living room in case I am there.
4– To transfer the call to my bedroom in case I am sleeping.
5– To transfer the call to my toilet in case I am attending to nature.
6– To transfer the call to my mobile phone if I am not at home.
7– To leave a message on my computer. (A password to access my computer is required. A password will be communicated to you at a later date to the Authorized Contact.)
8– To return to the main menu to listen to options 1 through 7.
9– To make a general complaint or inquiry, the contact will then be put on hold, pending the attention of my automated answering service.

While this may, on occasion, involve a lengthy wait, uplifting music will play for the duration of the call. Regrettably, but again following your example, I must also levy an establishment fee to cover the setting up of this new arrangement.

May I wish you a happy, if ever so slightly less prosperous, New Year.

Your Humble Client

(Remember: This was written by a 98 year old woman!!)

Back to joke index

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The $2 Bill

Webmaster’s note: This is a classic! But only US Americans (or possibly Canadians) older than 40 may appreciate it. 🙂

On my way home from work, I stopped at Taco Bell for a quick bite to eat. In my billfold are a $50 bill and a $2 bill. I figure that with a $2 bill, I can get something to eat and not have to worry about anyone getting irritated at me for trying to break a $50 bill.

Me: “Hi, I’d like one seven-layer burrito please, to go.”

Server: “That’ll be $1.04. Eat in?”

Me: “No, it’s to go.” At this point, I open my billfold and hand him the $2 bill. He looks at it kind of funny.

Server: “Uh, hang on a sec, I’ll be right back.”

He goes to talk to his manager, who is still within my earshot. The following conversation occurs between the two of them: Server: “Hey, you ever see a $2 bill?” Manager: “No. A what?”

Server: “A $2 bill. This guy just gave it to me.”

Manager: “Ask for something else There’s no such thing as a $2 bill.” Server: “Yeah, thought so”

He comes back to me and says, “We don’t take these. Do you have anything else?”

Me: “Just this fifty. You don’t take $2 bills? Why?”

Server: “I don’t know.”

Me: “See here where it says legal tender?”

Server: “Yeah.”

Me: “So, why won’t you take it?”

Server: “Well, hang on a sec.”

He goes back to his manager, who has been watching me like I’m a shoplifter, and says to him, “He says I have to take it.”

Manager: “Doesn’t he have anything else?”

Server: “Yeah, a fifty. I’ll get it and you can open the safe and get change “

Manager: “I’m not opening the safe with him in here.”

Server: “What should I do?”

Manager: “Tell him to come back later when he has real money.”

Server: “I can’t tell him that! You tell him.”

Manager: “Just tell him.”

Server: “No way! This is weird. I’m going in back.”

The manager approaches me and says, “I’m sorry, but we don’t take big bills this time of night.”

Me: “It’s only seven o’clock! Well then, here’s a two dollar bill.”

Manager: “We don’t take those, either.”

Me: “Why not?”

Manager: “I think you know why.”

Me: “No really, tell me why.”

Manager: “Please leave before I call mall security.”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Manager: “Please leave before I call mall security.”

Me: “What on earth for?”

Manager: “Please, sir.”

Me: “Uh, go ahead, call them”

Manager: “Would you please just leave?”

Me: “No.”

Manager: “Fine — have it your way then.”

Me: “Hey, that’s Burger King, isn’t it?”

At this point, he backs away from me and calls mall security on the phone around the corner. I have two people staring at me from the dining area, and I begin laughing out loud, just for effect. A few minutes later this 45-year-oldish guy comes in.

Guard: “Yeah, Mike, what’s up?”

Manager (whispering): “This guy is trying to give me some (pause) funny money.”

Guard: “No kidding! What?”

Manager: “Get this … a two dollar bill.”

Guard (incredulous): “Why would a guy fake a two dollar bill?”

Manager: “I don’t know. He’s kinda weird. He says the only other thing he has is a fifty.”

Guard: “Oh, so the fifty’s fake!”

Manager: “No, the two dollar bill is.”

Guard: “Why would he fake a two dollar bill?”

Manager: “I don’t know! Can you talk to him, and get him out of here?”

Guard: “Yeah.”

Security Guard walks over to me and……
Guard: “Mike here tells me you have some fake bills you’re trying to use”

Me: “Uh, no.”

Guard: “Lemme see ’em.”

Me: “Why?”

Guard: “Do you want me to get the cops in here?”

At this point I am ready to say, “Sure, please!” but I want to eat, so I say “I’m just trying to buy a burrito and pay for it with this two dollar bill.

I put the bill up near his face, and he flinches like I’m taking a swing at him. He takes the bill, turns it over a few times in his hands, and says, Hey, Mike, what’s wrong with this bill?”

Manager: “It’s fake.”

Guard: “It doesn’t look fake to me.”

Manager: “But it’s a two dollar bill.”

Guard: “Yeah?”

Manager: “Well, there’s no such thing, is there?”

The security guard and I both look at him like he’s an idiot, and it dawns on the guy that he has no clue.

So, it turns out that my burrito was free, and he threw in a small drink and some of those cinnamon thingies, too.

Made me want to get a whole stack of two dollar bills just to see what happens when I try to buy stuff. If I got the right group of people, I could probably end up in jail. You get free food there, too!

Help with adopting kittens

To all my dearest friends,

I need some help.

My cousin’s cat had kittens and he was able to give away all but 3 of them. I told him I would help him find homes for the last 3. I can’t take one but if three of you could take just one it would be such a help and the kittens could have a nice home. Since he lives up by the Lake Robinson Nuclear Power Plant, I’ll go pick them up for you.

I’ve attached pictures of the last 3 kittens.

Will you help?

Back to joke index

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Meals on Wheels

A cat dies and goes to Heaven. God meets him at the gate and says, “You have been a good cat all of these years. Anything you desire is yours, all you have to do is ask.”

The cats says, “Well, I lived all my life with a poor family on a farm and had to sleep on hardwood floors.”

God says, “Say no more.” And instantly, a fluffy pillow appears.

A few days later, 6 mice are killed in a tragic accident and they go to Heaven. God meets them at the gate with the same offer that He made the cat. The mice said, “All our lives we’ve had to run. Cats, dogs and even women with brooms have chased us. If we could only have a pair of roller skates, we wouldn’t have to run anymore.”

God says, “Say no more.” And instantly, each mouse is fitted with a beautiful pair of tiny roller skates.

About a week later, God decides to check and see how the cat is doing. The cat is sound asleep on his new pillow. God gently wakes him and asks, “How are you doing? Are you happy here?”

The cat yawns and stretches and says, “Oh, I’ve never been happier in my life. And those Meals on Wheels you’ve been sending over are the best!”

Back to joke index

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US Politics for Dummies

Q: Daddy, why did we have to attack Iraq?

A: Because they had weapons of mass destruction honey.

Q: But the inspectors didn’t find any weapons of mass destruction.

A: That’s because the Iraqis were hiding them.

Q: And that’s why we invaded Iraq?

A: Yep. Invasions always work better than inspections.

Q: But after we invaded them, we STILL didn’t find any weapons of mass destruction, did we?

A: That’s because the weapons are so well hidden. Don’t worry, we’ll find something, probably right before the 2004 election.

Q: Why did Iraq want all those weapons of mass destruction?

A: To use them in a war, silly.

Q: I’m confused. If they had all those weapons that they planned to use in a war, then why didn’t they use any of those weapons when we went to war with them?

A: Well, obviously they didn’t want anyone to know they had those weapons, so they chose to die by the thousands rather than defend themselves.

Q: That doesn’t make sense Daddy. Why would they choose to die if they had all those big weapons to fight us back with?

A: It’s a different culture. It’s not supposed to make sense.

Q: I don’t know about you, but I don’t think they had any of those weapons our government said they did.

A: Well, you know, it doesn’t matter whether or not they had those weapons. We had another good reason to invade them anyway.

Q: And what was that?

A: Even if Iraq didn’t have weapons of mass destruction, Saddam Hussein was a cruel dictator, which is another good reason to invade another country.

Q: Why? What does a cruel dictator do that makes it OK to invade his country?

A: Well, for one thing, he tortured his own people.

Q: Kind of like what they do in China?

A: Don’t go comparing China to Iraq. China is a good economic competitor, where millions of people work for slave wages in sweatshops to make U.S. corporations richer.

Q: So if a country lets its people be exploited for American corporate gain, it’s a good country, even if that country tortures people?

A: Right.

Q: Why were people in Iraq being tortured?

A: For political crimes, mostly, like criticizing the government. People who criticized the government in Iraq were sent to prison and tortured.

Q: Isn’t that exactly what happens in China?

A: I told you, China is different.

Q: What’s the difference between China and Iraq?

A: Well, for one thing, Iraq was ruled by the Ba’ath party, while China is Communist.

Q: Didn’t you once tell me Communists were bad?

A: No, just Cuban Communists are bad.

Q: How are the Cuban Communists bad?

A: Well, for one thing, people who criticize the government in Cuba are sent to prison and tortured.

Q: Like in Iraq?

A: Exactly.

Q: And like in China, too?

A: I told you, China’s a good economic competitor. Cuba, on the other hand, is not.

Q: How come Cuba isn’t a good economic competitor?

A: Well, you see, back in the early 1960s, our government passed some laws that made it illegal for Americans to trade or do any business with Cuba until they stopped being Communists and started being capitalists like us.

Q: But if we got rid of those laws, opened up trade with Cuba, and started doing business with them, wouldn’t that help the Cubans become capitalists?

A: Don’t be a smart-ass.

Q: I didn’t think I was being one.

A: Well, anyway, they also don’t have freedom of religion in Cuba.

Q: Kind of like China and the Falun Gong movement?

A: I told you, stop saying bad things about China. Anyway, Saddam Hussein came to power through a military coup, so he’s not really a legitimate leader anyway.

Q: What’s a military coup?

A: That’s when a military general takes over the government of a country by force, instead of holding free elections like we do in the United States.

Q: Didn’t the ruler of Pakistan come to power by a military coup?

A: You mean General Pervez Musharraf? Uh, yeah, he did, but Pakistan is our friend.

Q: Why is Pakistan our friend if their leader is illegitimate?

A: I never said Pervez Musharraf was illegitimate.

Q: Didn’t you just say a military general who comes to power by forcibly overthrowing the legitimate government of a nation is an illegitimate leader?

A: Only Saddam Hussein. Pervez Musharraf is our friend, because he helped us invade Afghanistan.

Q: Why did we invade Afghanistan?

A: Because of what they did to us on September 11th.

Q: What did Afghanistan do to us on September 11th?

A: Well, on September 11th, nineteen men? Fifteen of them Saudi Arabians? hijacked four airplanes and flew three of them into buildings, killing over 3,000 Americans.

Q: So how did Afghanistan figure into all that?

A: Afghanistan was where those bad men trained, under the oppressive rule of the Taliban.

Q: Aren’t the Taliban those bad radical Islamics who chopped off people’s heads and hands?

A: Yes, that’s exactly who they were. Not only did they chop off people’s heads and hands, but they oppressed women, too.

Q: Didn’t the Bush administration give the Taliban 43 million dollars back in May of 2001?

A: Yes, but that money was a reward because they did such a good job fighting drugs.

Q: Fighting drugs?

A: Yes, the Taliban were very helpful in stopping people from growing opium poppies.

Q: How did they do such a good job?

A: Simple. If people were caught growing opium poppies, the Taliban would have their hands and heads cut off.

Q: So, when the Taliban cut off people’s heads and hands for growing flowers, that was OK, but not if they cut people’s heads and hands off for other reasons?

A: Yes. It’s OK with us if radical Islamic fundamentalists cut off people’s hands for growing flowers, but it’s cruel if they cut off people’s hands for stealing bread.

Q: Don’t they also cut off people’s hands and heads in Saudi Arabia?

A: That’s different. Afghanistan was ruled by a tyrannical patriarchy that oppressed women and forced them to wear burqas whenever they were in public, with death by stoning as the penalty for women who did not comply.

Q: Don’t Saudi women have to wear burqas in public, too?

A: No, Saudi women merely wear a traditional Islamic body covering.

Q: What’s the difference?

A: The traditional Islamic covering worn by Saudi women is a modest yet fashionable garment that covers all of a woman’s body except for her eyes and fingers. The burqa, on the other hand, is an evil tool of patriarchal oppression that covers all of a woman’s body except for her eyes and fingers.

Q: It sounds like the same thing with a different name.

A: Now, don’t go comparing Afghanistan and Saudi Arabia. The Saudis are our friends.

Q: But I thought you said 15 of the 19 hijackers on September 11th were from Saudi Arabia.

A: Yes, but they trained in Afghanistan.

Q: Who trained them?

A: A very bad man named Osama bin Laden.

Q: Was he from Afghanistan?

A: Uh, no, he was from Saudi Arabia too. But he was a bad man, a very bad man.

Q: I seem to recall he was our friend once.

A: Only when we helped him and the mujahadeen repel the Soviet invasion of Afghanistan back in the 1980s.

Q: Who are the Soviets? Was that the Evil Communist Empire Ronald Reagan talked about?

A: There are no more Soviets. The Soviet Union broke up in 1990 or thereabouts, and now they have elections and capitalism like us. We call them Russians now.

Q: So the Soviets ? I mean, the Russians ? are now our friends?

A: Well, not really. You see, they were our friends for many years after they stopped being Soviets, but then they decided not to support our invasion of Iraq, so we’re mad at them now. We’re also mad at the French and the Germans because they didn’t help us invade Iraq either.

Q: So the French and Germans are evil, too?

A: Not exactly evil, but just bad enough that we had to rename French fries and French toast to Freedom Fries and Freedom Toast.

Q: Do we always rename foods whenever another country doesn’t do what we want them to do?

A: No, we just do that to our friends. Our enemies, we invade.

Q: But wasn’t Iraq one of our friends back in the 1980s?

A: Well, yeah. For a while.

Q: Was Saddam Hussein ruler of Iraq back then?

A: Yes, but at the time he was fighting against Iran, which made him our friend, temporarily.

Q: Why did that make him our friend?

A: Because at that time, Iran was our enemy.

Q: Isn’t that when he gassed the Kurds?

A: Yeah, but since he was fighting against Iran at the time, we looked the other way, to show him we were his friend.

Q: So anyone who fights against one of our enemies automatically becomes our friend?

A: Most of the time, yes.

Q: And anyone who fights against one of our friends is automatically an enemy?

A: Sometimes that’s true, too. However, if American corporations can profit by selling weapons to both sides at the same time, all the better.

Q: Why?

A: Because war is good for the economy, which means war is good for America. Also, since God is on America’s side, anyone who opposes war is a godless un-American Communist. Do you understand now why we attacked Iraq?

Q: I think so. We attacked them because God wanted us to, right?

A: Yes.

Q: But how did we know God wanted us to attack Iraq?

A: Well, you see, God personally speaks to George W. Bush and tells him what to do.

Q: So basically, what you’re saying is that we attacked Iraq because George W. Bush hears voices in his head?

A. Yes! You finally understand how the world works. Now close your eyes, make yourself comfortable, and go to sleep. Good night.

Q: Good night, Daddy.

California International Studies Project
Stanford University

Back to joke index

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Letter to God

A little boy wanted $100.00 very badly and prayed for weeks, but nothing happened. Then he decided to write God a letter requesting the $100.00. When the postal authorities received the letter to God, USA, they decided to send it to the President. The president was so amused that he instructed his secretary to send the little boy a $5.00 bill. The president thought this would appear to be a lot of money to a little boy. The little boy was delighted with the $5.00 bill and sat down to write a thank-you note to God, which read:

>>> Dear God: Thank you very much for sending the money. However, I noticed that for some reason you sent it through Washington, DC, and those crooks deducted $95.00 in taxes.

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Weapons of Math Instruction

At New York’s Kennedy airport today, an individual later discovered to be a public school teacher was arrested trying to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a setsquare, a slide rule, and a calculator.
At a morning press conference, Attorney general John Ashcroft said he believes the man is a member of the notorious al-gebra movement. He is being charged by the FBI weapons of math instruction.
“Al-gebra is a fearsome cult,” Ashcroft said. “They desire average solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in a search of absolute value. They use secret code names like “x” and “y” and refer to themselves as “unknowns”, but we have determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country.”
As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, there are 3 sides to every triangle,” Ashcroft declared.
When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said, “If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes.”I am gratified that our government has given us a sine that it is intent on protracting us from these math-dogs who are willing to disintegrate us with calculus disregard. Murky statisticians love to inflict plane on every sphere of influence,” the President said, adding: “Under the circumferences, we must differentiate their root, make our point, and draw the line.”
President Bush warned, “These weapons of math instruction have the potential to decimal everything in their math on a scalene never before seen unless we become exponents of a Higher Power and begin to factor-in random facts of vertex.”
Attorney General Ashcroft said, “As our Great Leader would say, read my ellipse. Here is one principle he is uncertainty of: though they continue to multiply, their days are numbered as the hypotenuse tightens around their necks.

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No More Privacy

Operator : “Thank you for calling Pizza Hut.”

Customer: “Yes, hello, may I please order..”

Operator : “I must have your multi purpose card number first, Sir”

Customer: “It’s eh…, hold on….6102049998-45-54610”

Operator : “OK… you’re… Mr Sheehan, calling from 17 Meadow Drive.
Your home number is 555-494-2366, your office # is 555-745-2302 and your
mobile is 014-266-2566. Would you like to have the delivery made to 17
Meadow Drive?

Customer: “Yes, how did you get all my phone numbers?”

Operator : “We are ‘connected to the system’ Sir”

Costomer: “May I order your Seafood Pizza…?”

.
Operator : “That’s not a good idea, Sir”

Customer: “How come?”

Operator : “According to your medical records, you have high blood
pressure and even higher cholesterol level, Sir”

Customer: “What?… What do you recommend then?”

Operator : “Try our Low Fat Soybean Yogurt Pizza. You’ll like it”

Customer: “How do you know for sure?”

Operator : “You borrowed a book entitled “Popular Soybean Yogurt Dishes”
from the National Library last week, Sir”

Customer: “OK I give up… Give me two family sized ones then, how much
will that cost?

Operator : “That should be enough for your family of 5, Sir. The total
is $ 29.99

Customer: “I will be paying by credit card.”

Operator : “I’m afraid you have to pay us cash, Sir. Your credit card
is too close to the limit thereby marking you as a credit risk – and
that’s not including the late fees that were added to your electric bill
for being one week late in your payment October of last year. By the way,
did you know you are going to owe your bank $1.55 when you receive your
statement next week – you obviously made a mathematical error in your
check book last month when you deducted the payment made to Blockbuster
Video for the rental of “The Matrix”, giant
tub of popcorn, 2 Snickers bars, 1 Butterfinger, 2 M&M’s (1 plain/1
peanut) and family size polybag of licorice whips (red not black).”

Customer: “I guess I have to run to the neighborhood ATM and withdraw
some cash before your guy arrives” .

Operator : “You can’t do that, Sir. Based on the records, you’ve reached
your daily limit on machine withdrawal today after your tire separated
on Vermont Rd on the way to pick up your son, James from his soccer
match against Lincoln Jr. High and you had to call Ace Towing. We extend
our congrats to your son on his win however!” .

Customer: “Never mind just send the pizzas, I’ll have the cash ready.
How long is it gonna take anyway?” .

Operator : “About 45 minutes, Sir but if you can’t wait you can always
come and collect it on your motorcycle…” .

Customer: ” What the..?” .

Operator : “According to the details in system, you own a
Harley,…registration number E1123…” .

Customer: “@#%/$@&?#” .

Operator : “Better watch your language Sir. Remember on 15th July 1987
you were convicted of using abusive language to a policeman… .

Customer: (Speechless) .

Operator : “Is there anything else Sir?” .

Customer: “Nothing… by the way… are you giving me the 3 free bottles
of Pepsi as advertised?” .

Operator : “We normally would Sir, but based on your records you have a
diabetic in the family and we do not trust you to store the Pepsi
responsibly and keep it out of the hands of said diabetic.”

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Cats and Dogs

Note from webmaster: I thought this was the funniest thing I read in a long time! For the record, I love both dogs AND cats. I presently care for a Siberian Husky and would also like to have a cat but cannot because others I live with don’t like them. 🙁

EXCERPTS FROM A DOG’S DIARY:

Day 180
8:00 am – OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am – OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am – OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
10:30 am – OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
11:30 am – OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
12:00 noon – OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 pm – OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!
4:00 pm – OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:00 pm – OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 pm – OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!

Day 181
8:00 am – OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am – OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am – OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
10:30 am – OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
11:30 am – OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
12:00 noon – OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 pm – OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!
4:00 pm – OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:00 pm – OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 pm – OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!

Day 182
8:00 am – OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am – OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am – OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
10:30 am – OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
11:30 am – OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
12:00 noon – OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 pm – OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!
4:00 pm – OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:00 pm – OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 pm – OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!

EXCERPTS FROM A CAT’S DIARY:

Day 183

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.
They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal.
The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild
satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture.
Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant.

Day 184

Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while
they were walking almost succeeded, must try this at the top of the
stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I
once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair … must try
this on their bed.

Day 185

Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in attempt to
make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into
their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little
cat I was…. Hmmm. Not working according to plan.

Day 186

I am finally aware of how sadistic they are. For no good reason I was
chosen for the water torture. This time however it included a burning
foamy chemical called “shampoo.” What sick minds could invent such a
liquid. My only consolation is the piece of thumb still stuck between my
teeth.

Day 187

There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in
solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell
the foul odor of the glass tubes they call “beer”. More importantly I
overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of “allergies.” Must
learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.

Day 188

I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The
dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is
obviously a half-wit. The bird on the other hand has got to be an
informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my
every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety
is assured. But I can wait, it is only a matter of time!

Back to joke index

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Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?

GEORGE W. BUSH

We don’t really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The chicken is either with us or it is against us. There is no middle ground here.

AL GORE

I invented the chicken. I invented the road. Therefore, the chicken crossing the road represented the application of these two different functions of government in a new, reinvented way designed to bring greater services to the American people.

COLIN POWELL

Now at the left of the screen, you clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.

HANS BLIX

We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed access to the other side of the road.

MOHAMMED ALDOURI (Iraq’s former ambassador)

The chicken did not cross the road. This is a complete fabrication. We don’t even have a chicken.

SADDAM HUSSEIN

This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

RALPH NADER

The chicken’s habitat on the original side of the road had been polluted by unchecked industrialist greed. The chicken did not reach the unspoiled habitat on the other side of the road because it was crushed by the wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV.

PAT BUCHANAN

To steal a job from a decent, hard-working American.

RUSH LIMBAUGH

I don’t know why the chicken crossed the road, but I’ll bet it was getting a government grant to cross the road, and I’ll bet someone out there is already forming a support group to help chickens with crossing-the-road syndrome. Can you believe this? How much more of this can real Americans take? Chickens crossing the road paid for by their tax dollars, and when I say tax dollars, I’m talking about your money, money the government took from you to build roads for chickens to cross.

MARTHA STEWART

No one called to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the farmer’s market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.

JERRY FALWELL

Because the chicken was gay! Isn’t it obvious? Can’t you people see the plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going to the other side. That’s what they call it — the other side. Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And, if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like the other side.

DR. SEUSS

Did the chicken cross the road?
Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes, The chicken crossed the road,
But why it crossed, I’ve not been told!

ERNEST HEMINGWAY

To die. In the rain. Alone.

MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.

I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.

GRANDPA

In my day, we didn’t ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.

BARBARA WALTERS

Isn’t that interesting? In a few moments we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart-warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting and went on to accomplish its life-long dream of crossing the road.

JOHN LENNON

Imagine all the chickens crossing roads in peace.

ARISTOTLE

It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

KARL MARX

It was an historical inevitability.

VOLTAIRE

I may not agree with what the chicken did, but I will defend to the death its right to do it.

RONALD REAGAN

What chicken?

CAPTAIN KIRK

To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

FOX MULDER

You saw it cross the road with your own eyes! How many more chickens have to cross before you believe it?

SIGMUND FREUD

The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

BILL GATES

I have just released eChicken 2003, which will not only cross roads, but also will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook – and Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken.

ALBERT EINSTEIN

Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the chicken?

BILL CLINTON

I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by chicken? Could you define chicken, please?

COLONEL SANDERS

I missed one?

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A conversation in the Oval Office

George: Condi! Nice to see you. What’s happening?
Condi: Sir, I have the report here about the new leader of China.
George: Great. Lay it on me.
Condi: Hu is the new leader of China.
George: That’s what I want to know.
Condi: That’s what I’m telling you.
George: That’s what I’m asking you. Who is the new leader of China?
Condi: Yes.
George: I mean the fellow’s name.
Condi: Hu.
George: The guy in China.
Condi: Hu.
George: The new leader of China.
Condi: Hu.
George: The Chinaman!
Condi: Hu is leading China.
George: Now whaddya’ asking me for?
Condi: I’m telling you Hu is leading China.
George: Well, I’m asking you. Who is leading China?
Condi: That’s the man’s name.
George: That’s who’s name?
Condi: Yes.
George: Will you or will you not tell me the name of the new leader of China?
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Yassir? Yassir Arafat is in China? I thought he was in the Middle East.
Condi: That’s correct.
George: Then who is in China?
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Yassir is in China?
Condi: No, sir.
George: Then who is?
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Yassir?
Condi: No, sir.
George: Look, Condi. I need to know the name of the new leader of China.
Get me the Secretary General of the U.N. on the phone.
Condi: Kofi?
George: No, thanks.
Condi: You want Kofi?
George: No.
Condi: You don’t want Kofi.
George: No. But now that you mention it, I could use a glass of milk. And then get me the U.N.
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Not Yassir! The guy at the U.N.
Condi: Kofi?
George: Milk! Will you please make the call?
Condi: And call who?
George: Who is the guy at the U.N?
Condi: Hu is the guy in China.
George: Will you stay out of China?!
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: And stay out of the Middle East! Just get me the guy at the U.N.
Condi: Kofi.
George: All right! With cream and two sugars. Now get on the phone.
(Condi picks up the phone.)
Condi: Rice, here.
George: Rice? Good idea. And a couple of egg rolls, too. Maybe we should send some to the guy in China.

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The shepherd and the economist
A man walking along a road in the countryside comes across a shepherd and a huge flock of sheep. Tells the shepherd, “I will bet you $100 against one of your sheep that I can tell you the exact number in this flock.” The shepherd thinks it over; it’s a big flock so he takes the bet. “973,” says the man. The shepherd is astonished, because that is exactly right. Says “OK, I’m a man of my word, take an animal.” Man picks one up and begins to walk away.

“Wait,” cries the shepherd, “Let me have a chance to get even. Double or nothing that I can guess your exact occupation.” Man says sure. “You are an economist for a government think tank,” says the shepherd. “Amazing!” responds the man, “You are exactly right! But tell me, how did you deduce that?”

“Well,” says the shepherd, “put down my dog and I will tell you.”

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THE LAWYER & THE LITTLE BOY
A lawyer is trying to call his clients. The phone rings and their little boy, in a whisper, says, "Hello."
Lawyer: "Is your mommy there?"
Boy: (whisper) "Yes."
Lawyer: "Can I speak with her?"
Boy: (whisper) "She’s busy."
Lawyer: "Is your daddy there?"
Boy: (whisper) "Yes."
Lawyer: "Can I speak with him?"
Boy: (whisper) "He’s busy."
Lawyer: "Is there anyone else there?"
Boy: (whisper) "The fire department."
Lawyer: "Can I talk to one of them?"
Boy: (whisper) "They’re busy."
Lawyer: "Is there anybody ELSE there?"
Boy: (whisper) "The police department."
Lawyer: "Well, can I talk to one of THEM?"
Boy: (whisper) "They’re busy."
Lawyer: "Let me get this straight, your mother,
father, the fire department AND the police department
are ALL in your house, and they’re ALL busy. WHAT
are they doing?"
Boy: (whisper) "They’re looking for me."

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McDonnell-Douglas Survey

This was actually posted very briefly on the McDonnell-Douglas web site by an employee there who obviously has a sense of humor. The company, of course, does not (have a sense of humor) – and made the web department take it down immediately.

—————————————————————-
Thank you for purchasing a McDonnell Douglas military aircraft. In order to protect your new investment, please take a few moments to fill out the warranty registration card below. Answering the survey questions is not required, but the information will help us to develop new products that best meet your needs and desires.

1. [_] Mr. [_] Mrs. [_] Ms. [_] Miss [_] Lt. [_]Gen. [_] Comrade [_] Classified [_]Other
First Name: ……………………………………………..
Initial: ……..
Last Name:………………………………………………
Password: ………………………… (max 8 char)
Code Name:………………………………………………
Latitude-Longitude-Altitude: …………………………..

2. Which model aircraft did you purchase?
[_] F-14 Tomcat
[_] F-15 Eagle
[_] F-16 Falcon
[_] F-117A Stealth
[_] Classified

3. Date of purchase (Year/Month/Day):
19…./…../…..

4. Serial Number:…………………………………

5. Please check where this product was purchased:
[_] Received as gift / aid package
[_] Catalog showroom
[_] Independent arms broker
[_] Mail order
[_] Discount store
[_] Government surplus
[_] Classified

6. Please check how you became aware of the McDonnell-Douglas product you have just purchased:
[_] Heard loud noise, looked up
[_] Store display
[_] Espionage
[_] Recommended by friend / relative / ally
[_] Political lobbying by manufacturer
[_] Was attacked by one

7. Please check the three (3) factors that most influenced your decision to purchase this McDonnell-Douglas product:
[_] Style / appearance
[_] Speed / maneuverability
[_] Price / value
[_] Comfort / convenience
[_] Kickback / bribe
[_] Recommended by salesperson
[_] McDonnell Douglas reputation
[_] Advanced Weapons Systems
[_] Backroom politics
[_] Negative experience opposing one in combat

8. Please check the location(s) where this product will be used:
[_] North America
[_] Iraq
[_] Central / South America
[_] Iraq
[_] Aircraft carrier
[_] Iraq
[_] Europe
[_] Iraq
[_] Middle East (not Iraq)
[_] Iraq
[_] Africa
[_] Iraq
[_] Asia / Far East
[_] Iraq
[_] Misc. Third World countries
[_] Iraq
[_] Classified
[_] Iraq

9. Please check the products that you currently own or intend to purchase in the near future:
[_] Color TV
[_] VCR
[_] ICBM
[_] Killer Satellite
[_] CD Player
[_] Air-to-Air Missiles
[_] Space Shuttle
[_] Home Computer
[_] Nuclear Weapon

10. How would you describe yourself or your organization? (Check all that apply:)
[_] Communist / Socialist
[_] Terrorist
[_] Crazed
[_] Neutral
[_] Democratic
[_] Dictatorship
[_] Corrupt
[_] Primitive / Tribal

11. How did you pay for your McDonnell-Douglas product?
[_] Deficit spending
[_] Cash
[_] Suitcases of cocaine
[_] Oil revenues
[_] Personal check
[_] Credit card
[_] Ransom money
[_] Traveler’s check

12. Your occupation
[_] Homemaker
[_] Sales / marketing
[_] Revolutionary
[_] Clerical
[_] Mercenary
[_] Tyrant
[_] Middle management
[_] Eccentric billionaire
[_] Defense Minister / General
[_] Retired
[_] Student

13. To help us understand our customers’ lifestyles, please indicate the interests and activities in which you and your spouse enjoy participating on a regular basis:
[_] Golf
[_] Boating / sailing
[_] Sabotage
[_] Running / jogging
[_] Propaganda / disinformation
[_] Destabilization / overthrow
[_] Default on loans
[_] Gardening
[_] Crafts
[_] Black market / smuggling
[_] Collectibles / collections
[_] Watching sports on TV
[_] Wines
[_] Interrogation / torture
[_] Household pets
[_] Crushing rebellions
[_] Espionage / reconnaissance
[_] Fashion clothing
[_] Border disputes
[_] Mutually Assured Destruction

Thank you for taking the time to fill out this questionnaire. Your answers will be used in market studies that will help McDonnell-Douglas serve you better in the future–as well as allowing you to receive mailings and special offers from other companies, governments, extremist groups, and mysterious consortia.
As a bonus for responding to this survey, you will be registered to win a brand new F-117A in our Desert Thunder Sweepstakes!
Comments or suggestions about our fighter planes? Please write to:

McDONNELL DOUGLAS CORPORATION
Marketing Department
Military Aerospace Division

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Advice from Mom

One evening, a young woman came home from a date, rather sad. She told her mother, "Anthony proposed to me an hour ago." "Then why are you so sad?" her mother asked.

"Because he also told me he is an atheist. Mom, he doesn’t even believe
there’s a Devil." Her mother replied, "Marry him anyway. Between the two of us, we’ll show him just how wrong he is."

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A man left for work one Friday afternoon. But, being payday, instead of going home, he stayed out the entire weekend partying with the boys and spending his entire paycheck.

When he finally appeared at home, Sunday night, he was confronted by a very angry wife and was barraged for nearly two hours with a tirade befitting his actions. 

Finally his wife stopped the nagging and simply said to him, "How would you like it if you didn’t see me for two or three days?" To which he replied, "That would be fine with me."

Monday went by and he didn’t see his wife. Tuesday and Wednesday came and went with the same results. Come Thursday, the swelling went down just enough where he could see her a little out of the corner of his left eye.

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Answering Machine Messages

"Hi. Now you say something."
—————————————————-

"I can’t come to the phone now because I have amnesia and I feel stupid talking to people I don’t remember. I’d appreciate it if you could help me out by leaving my name and telling me something about myself. Thanks."

—————————————————-

"Greetings, you have reached the Sixth Sense Detective Agency. We know who you are and what you want, so at the sound of the tone, please hang up."

—————————————————-

"You know what I hate about answering machine messages? They go on and on and on and on, wasting your time. I mean, all they really need to say is, "We aren’t in, leave a message." That’s why I’ve decided to keep mine simple and short. I pledge to you, my caller, that you will never have to suffer through another long answering machine message when you call me…"

—————————————————-

"Hello, this is Douglas. I’m not home right now, but I can take a message. Hang on a second while I get a pencil." (background noise — open a drawer and shuffle stuff around) "Okay, what would you like me to tell me?"

—————————————————-

"Hello. I’m Douglas’s answering machine. What are you?"

——————————————————————

"Douglas’s house, the final frontier. These are the messages of Douglas’s answering machine. Its five-year mission: to seek out your name and your telephone number. To boldly inform you to wait for the tone."

—————————————————-

<Noisy pick-up of phone> "Hi, I’m a burglar and I was just about to steal Douglas’s answering machine. If you give me your name and number I’ll….uh…..I’ll post it on the fridge where he’ll see it. By the way, do you know where he keeps the silver?"

————————————————

"The number you’ve dialed is purely imaginary. Please multiply by one and dial again."

—————————————————-

Hi, Douglas’s answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I’ll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets on my face here."

————————————————

<voice 1> "Answer the phone, please, Hal."
<voice 2> "I’m sorry, Dave, I can’t do that."

————————————————

"This is not an answering machine — this is a telepathic thought-recording device. After the tone, think about your name, your reason for calling, and a number where I can reach you, and I’ll think about returning your call.

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Two sisters, one blonde and one brunette, inherit the family ranch. Unfortunately, after just a few years they are in financial trouble. In order to keep the bank from repossessing the ranch they need to purchase a bull so that they can breed their own stock.

The brunette balances their checkbook, then takes their last $600 out west to where a man has a prize bull for sale.

Upon leaving, she tells her sister, "When I get there, if I decide buy the bull, I’ll contact you to drive out after me and haul it home." 

The brunette arrives at the man’s ranch, inspects the bull and decides she does want to buy it. The man tells her that he can sell it for $599, no less. After paying him, she drives to the nearest town to send her sister a telegram to tell her the news.

She walks into the telegraph office, and says, "I want to send a telegram to my sister telling her that I’ve bought a bull for our ranch. I need her to hitch the trailer to our pick-up truck and drive out here so we can haul it home."

The telegraph operator explains that he’ll be glad to help then adds, "It’s just 99 cents a word".

Well, after paying for the bull, the brunette only has $1 left. She realizes that he’ll only be able to send her sister one word. After thinking for a few minutes, she nods, and says, "I want you to send her the word, ‘comfortable’.

The telegraph operator shakes his head. "How is she ever going to know that you want her to hitch the trailer to your pick-up and drive out here to haul that bull back to your ranch if you send her the word, ‘comfortable’?"

The brunette explains, "My sister is blonde. She’ll read it slowly."

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A man was walking along a deserted beach one day and found a strange looking bottle lying in the sand. He looked up and down the beach and didn’t see anyone who might have dropped it, so he decided to open the bottle.

A powerful genie appeared and thanked the man for letting him out of his magical cage.

The genie said, "I am so grateful to get out of that bottle that I will grant you a wish. BUT, I can only grant one."

The man thought for a while and finally said, "I have always wanted to go to Hawaii, but I’ve never been able to go because I cannot stand flying in an airplane, and boats tend to make me claustrophobic. So for my wish, I want a road to be built to Hawaii."

The genie thought about the road for a few minutes and finally said, "No, I don’t think I can do that. Just think of all the work involved. Consider all the piling needed to hold up a highway and how deep they would have to go to reach the bottom of the ocean. Just imagine all the pavement needed. No, I’m sorry, but that is just too much to ask."

The man thought for a few minutes and then decided on his second choice. The man said, "There IS one other thing I have always wanted. I would like to be able to understand women. What makes them laugh and cry, why are they temperamental, and why are they so difficult to get along with. Basically, I’d like to know what makes them tick."

The genie pondered the request for a moment, and finally said, "So, do you want two lanes or four?"

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An elderly couple, a middle-aged couple and a young newlywed couple, wanted to join a church.

The pastor said, "We have special requirements for new parishioners. You must abstain from having sex for two weeks."

The couples agreed and came back at the end of two weeks.

The pastor went to the elderly couple and asked, "Were you able to abstain from sex for the two weeks?"

The old man replied, "No problem at all, Pastor." "Congratulations! Welcome to the church!", said the pastor.

The pastor went to the middle-aged couple and asked,  "Well, were you able to abstain from sex for the two weeks?"

The man replied, "The first week wasn’t too bad. The second week I had to sleep on the couch for a couple of nights but, yes, we made it."

"Congratulations! Welcome to the church!", said the pastor.

The pastor then went to the newlywed couple and asked, "Well, were you able to abstain from sex for two weeks?"

"No Pastor, we were not able to go without sex for the two weeks," the young man replied sadly.

"What happened?" inquired the pastor.

"My wife was reaching for a can of paint on the top shelf and dropped it. When she bent over to pick it up, I was overcome with lust and took advantage of her right there."

"You understand, of course, this means you will not be welcome in our church," stated the pastor.

"We know." said the young man. "We’re not welcome at the Home Center anymore, either."

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A bachelor who lived at home with his mother and pet cat went on a trip to Europe. Before he left he told his best friend to inform him of any emergencies. A few days after his departure, his cat climbed up on the roof, fell off and was killed. His friend immediately wired him with the message: "Your cat died!"

In a few hours he was back home, having cut short his trip in grief and anger at his friend, whom he told "Why didn’t you break the news to me gradually? You know how close I was to my cat! You could have sent a message ‘Your cat climbed up on the roof today’, and the next day you could’ve written, ‘Your cat fell off the roof’ and let me down slowly that he died."

After a quick memorial service, the bachelor left again to continue his trip. A few days later he returns to his hotel and there is a message waiting for him from his friend. He read, "Your mother climbed up on the roof today."

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Adam was walking around the garden of Eden feeling very lonely, so God asked him, "What is wrong with you?"

Adam said he didn’t have anyone to talk to.

God said that He was going to make Adam a companion and that it would be a woman.

He said, "This person will gather food for you, cook for you, and when you discover clothing she’ll wash it for you. She will always agree with every decision you make. She will bear your children and never ask you to get up in the middle of the night to take care of them. She will not nag you and will always be the first to admit she was wrong when you’ve had a disagreement. She will never have a headache and will freely give you love and passion whenever you need it.

Adam asked God, "What will a woman like this cost?"

God replied, "An arm and a leg."

Then Adam asked, "What can I get for a rib?"

The rest is history …..

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There once was a rich man who was near death. He was very grieved because he had worked so hard for his money and he wanted to be able to take it with him to heaven. So he began to pray that he might be able to take some of his wealth with him.

An angel hears his plea and appears to him."Sorry, but you can’t take your wealth with you." The man implores the angel to speak to God to see if He might bend the rules.

The man continues to pray that his wealth could follow him. The angel reappears and informs the man that God has decided to allow him to take one suitcase with him. Overjoyed, the man gathers his largest suitcase and fills it with pure gold bars and places it beside his bed.

Soon afterward the man dies and shows up at the Gates of Heaven to greet St. Peter. St. Peter seeing the suitcase says, "Hold on, you can’t bring that in here!"

But the man explains to St. Peter that he has permission and asks him to verify his story with the Lord. Sure enough, St. Peter checks and comes back saying, "You’re right.. You are allowed one carry-on bag, but I’m supposed to check its contents before letting it through."

St. Peter opens the suitcase to inspect the worldly items that the man found too precious to leave behind and exclaims, "You brought pavement?!!!"

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Got a letter from Grandma the other day…

The other day I went up to a local Christian bookstore and saw a "honk if you love Jesus" bumper sticker. I was feeling particularly sassy that day because I had just come from a thrilling choir performance, followed by a thunderous prayer meeting, so I bought the sticker and put it on my bumper. Boy, I’m glad I did! What an uplifting experience that followed!
I was stopped at a red light at a busy intersection, just lost in thought about the Lord and how good He is…and I didn’t notice that the light had changed. It is a good thing someone else loves Jesus because if he hadn’t honked, I’d never have noticed!

I found that LOTS of people love Jesus! Why, while I was sitting there the guy behind started honking like crazy, and then leaned out of his window and screamed "For the love of GOD! GO! GO! Jesus Christ, GO!" What an exuberant cheerleader he was for Jesus! Everyone started honking! I just leaned out of my window and started waving and smiling at all these loving people. I even honked my horn a few times to share in the love! There must have been a man from Florida back there because I heard him yelling something about a "sunny beach"… I saw another guy waving in a funny way with only his middle finger stuck up in the air. Then I asked my teenage grandson in the back seat what that meant, he said that it was probably a Hawaiian good luck sign or something. Well, I never met anyone from Hawaii, so I leaned out the window and gave him the good luck sign back. My grandson burst out laughing…why he was enjoying this religious experience!

A couple of people were so caught up in joy of the moment that they got out of their cars and started walking towards me. I bet they wanted to pray or ask what church I attended, but this is when I noticed the light had changed. So, I waved to all my sisters and brothers grinning, and drove on through the intersection before the light changed again and I felt kind of sad that I had to leave them after all the love we had shared, so I slowed the car down, leaned out of the window and gave them the Hawaiian good luck sign one last time as I drove away.
Praise the Lord for such wonderful folks!

Love grandma.

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An ambitious yuppie finally decided to take a vacation. He booked himself on a Caribbean cruise and proceeded to have the time of his life. … at least for awhile. A hurricane came unexpectedly. The ship went down and was lost instantly.

The man found himself swept up on the shore of an island with no other people, no supplies, nothing. Only bananas and coconuts. Used to 4-star hotels, this guy had no idea what to do.

So for the next four months he ate bananas, drank coconut juice, longed for his old life, and fixed his gaze on the sea, hoping to spot a rescue ship. One day, as he was lying on the beach, he spotted movement out of the corner of his eye. It was a rowboat, and in it was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen. She rowed up to him.

In disbelief, he asked her: “Where did you come from? How did you get here?”

“I rowed from the other side of the island,” she said, “I landed here when my cruise ship sank.” “Amazing,” he said, “I didn’t know anyone else had survived. How many of you are there? You were really lucky to have a rowboat wash up with you.”

“It’s only me,” she said, “and the rowboat didn’t wash up, nothing did.” He was confused, “Then how did you get the rowboat?”. “Oh, simple.” replied the woman “I made the rowboat out of raw material that I found on the island, the oars were whittled from Gum tree branches, I wove the bottom from Palm branches, and the sides and stern came from a Eucalyptus tree.”

“But– but, that’s impossible,” stuttered the man, “you had no tools or hardware, how did you manage?” “Oh, that was no problem,” replied the woman, “on the south side of the island there is a very unusual strata of alluvial rock exposed. I found that if I fired it to a certain temperature in my kiln, it melted into forgeable ductile iron. I used that for tools, and used the tools to make the hardware.

But, enough of that,” she said. “Where do you live?” Sheepishly he confessed that he had been sleeping on the beach the whole time. “Well, let’s row over to my place, then” she said. After a few minutes of rowing, she docked the boat at a small wharf. As the man looked onto shore he nearly fell out of the boat. Before him was a stone walk leading to an exquisite bungalow painted in blue and white.

While the woman tied up the rowboat with an expertly woven hemp rope, the man could only stare ahead, dumbstruck. As they walked into the house, she said casually “It’s not much, but I call it home. Sit down please; would you like to have a drink?”

“No, no thank you” he said, still dazed, “can’t take any more coconut juice.” “It’s not coconut juice,” the woman replied. “I have a still.” How about a Pina Colada?” Trying to hide his continued amazement, the man accepted, and they sat down on her couch to talk. After they had exchanged their stories, the woman announced, “I’m going to slip into something more comfortable. Would you like to take a shower and shave, there is a razor upstairs in the cabinet in the bathroom.”

No longer questioning anything, the man went into the bathroom. There in the cabinet was a razor made from a bone handle. Two shells honed to a hollow ground edge were fastened on to its end inside of a swivel mechanism. “This woman is amazing,” he mused, “what next?”

When he returned, she greeted him wearing nothing but vines –strategically positioned– and smelling faintly of gardenias. She beckoned for him to sit down next to her.

“Tell me,” she began, suggestively, slithering closer to him, “we’ve been out here for a very long time. You’ve been lonely. There’s something I’m sure you really feel like doing right now, something you’ve been longing for all these months? You know…” She stared into his eyes.

He couldn’t believe what he was hearing: “You mean–?”, he replied, “…I can check my e-mail from here?”

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A judge was interviewing a woman regarding her pending divorce, and
asked, "What are the grounds for your divorce?"

She replied, "About four acres and a nice little home in the
middle of the property with a stream running by."

"No," he said, "I mean what is the foundation of this case?"

"It is made of concrete, brick and mortar," she responded.

"I mean," he continued, "What are your relations like?"

"I have an aunt and uncle living here in town, and so do my
husband’s parents."

"Do you have a real grudge?"

"No," she replied, "We have a two-car carport and have never really needed one."

"Please," he tried again, "is there any infidelity in your marriage?"

"Yes, both my son and daughter have stereo sets. We don’t necessarily like the music, but the answer to your questions is yes."

"Ma’am, does your husband ever beat you up?"

"Yes," she responded, "about twice a week he gets up earlier than I do."

Finally, in frustration, the judge asked, "Lady, why do you want a divorce?"

"Oh, I don’t want a divorce," she replied. "I’ve never wanted a divorce. My husband does. He said he can’t communicate with
me."

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Comparison of Religious Theory in the Late 20th Century

Here’s a tongue in cheek article a friend sent me. I hope it doesn’t offend anyone but I thought it was pretty humorous because it hits close on the main emphasis of that particular Faith. If you don’t think so, it could be your knowledge of the different Faiths covered here is either too limited or too extensive!

Capitalism – He who dies with the most toys, wins.
Hari Krishna – He who plays with the most toys, wins.
Catholicism – He who denies himself the most toys, wins.
Orthodox Judaism – Our toys are the only Kosher toys.
Greek Orthodox – They were our toys first.
Messianic Judaism – No, they were OURS first.
Russian Orthodox – Our toys are the only legally correct toys.
Branch Davidians – He who dies playing with the biggest toys, wins.
Atheism – There is no toy maker.
Polytheism – There are many toy makers.
Evolutionism – The toys made themselves from less complicated models.
Paganism – Every tree is a toy.
Church of Scientology – Toys are us.
Communism – Everyone gets the same number of toys, and you go straight to hell if we catch you selling yours.
B’Hai – All toys are just fine with us.
TM – Your toys are your just desserts.
Amish – Toys with batteries are surely a sin.
Taoism – The doll is as important as the dump truck.
Mormonism – Every boy can have as many toys as he wants.
Voodoo – Let me borrow that doll for a second.
Hedonism – To heck with the rule book!? Let’s play!
Hinduism – He who plays with bags of plastic farm animals, loses.
Presbyterian – My toys were custom made for me by the Toy Maker.
Evangelical Free – Would you like to play with some of my toys?
Full Gospel – Everyone who has a toy raise your hands and shout.
7th Day Adventist – He who plays with his toys on Saturday loses.
Heaven’s Gate – There is no toy like a comet. It’s to die for.
Church of Christ – He whose toys make music, loses.
Christian Church in America – Ours are not the only toys, but they are OUR TOYS ONLY!
Disciples of Christ – When we all get to toy land, what a day of play that will be.
Baptist – Once played, always played.
The Family – Toy, joy, toy, joy, toy. The best toy is a rainbow. (I take this as a compliment! It shows the emphasis the Family puts on using music to get out the Message, the Heavenly vision and eternal non-material values.)
Separatist Baptist – He that hath a sixteenth century toy hath righteousness.
Family of God – I got toys. You got toys? All God’s children got toys.
Jehovah’s Witnesses – He who sells the most toys door-to-door, wins.
Pentecostalism – He whose toys can talk, wins.
Charismaticism – Talk! Big deal. Our toys laugh and fall down!
Dutch Reformed – Toys? You mean this is supposed to be fun?
Brethren – Whatever else you do, keep your toys out of sight.
Faith Movement – If you ask for a new toy and don’t get it, it is your fault.
Methodist – Now which toy do we play with this week?
Existentialism – Toys are a figment of your imagination.
Confucianism – Once a toy is dipped in the water, it is no longer dry.
Episcopalian – Once a toy is sprinkled with water it wins.
United Pentecostal – Not wet enough and only our toys have the right label.
Third Wave – Our toys dance and sing the coolest songs!
Toronto Blessing – Pull our toys strings and they bark and laugh uncontrollably.
Non-denominationalism – We don’t care where the toys came from, let’s all just play with them.
Agnosticism – It is not possible to know whether toys make a bit of difference.
Unitarianism – Oh the joy of any toy, or not.
New Age – Angels are the most fashionable toys and crystal is really cool.
Abraham Forum Messianic– Your toys are syncretistic pagan idols, soaked in anti-semetic evil. My toys are rich in righteous tradition and entirely acceptable to the Toy Maker.
Abraham Forum Christian – Your toys are but ancient shadows of reality. My toys are straight from the Toymaker’s workbench.
GOD – "Grow up children! Just take my son Jesus, stop playing and get to work!"

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If Noah had lived in the United States in the year 2001, his story may have gone something like this:

 And the Lord spoke to Noah, and said, "In one year, I am going to make it rain and the rain shall not stop until it submerges the entire earth and all living flesh is destroyed. Because of this, I want you to save the righteous people and two of every living species on earth. Therefore, I am commanding you to build an Ark."

In a flash of lightning, God delivered the specifications for an Ark. Daunted by this task, but respectful of God’s wishes, Noah took the plans and agreed to build the ark. "Remember," said the Lord, "you must complete the Ark and fill it in one year’s time."

Exactly a year later, fierce storm clouds covered the earth and all the seas of the earth went into a tumult. The Lord saw that Noah was sitting in his front yard weeping.

"Noah!" He shouted. "Where is the Ark?"

"Lord, please forgive me," cried Noah. "I did my best, but there were big problems. First, I had to get a permit for construction, and your plans did not meet the building codes. I had to hire an engineering firm and redraw the plans. Then I got into a fight with OSHA over whether or not the Ark needed a sprinkler system and approved floatation devices. Then, my neighbor objected, claiming I was violating zoning ordinances by building the Ark in my front yard, so I had to get a variance from the city planning commission. Then, I had problems getting enough wood for the Ark, because there was a ban on cutting trees to protect the Spotted Owl. I finally convinced the US Forest Service that I really needed the wood to save the owls. However, the Fish and Wildlife Service won’t let me take the 2 owls. The carpenters formed a union and went on strike. I had to negotiate a settlement with the National Labor Relations Board before anyone would pick up a saw or hammer. Now, I have 16 carpenters on the Ark, but still no owls. When I started rounding up the other animals, an animal rights group sued me. They objected to me taking only two of each kind aboard. This suit is pending. Meanwhile, the EPA notified me that I could not complete the Ark without filing an environmental impact statement on your proposed flood. They didn’t take very kindly to the idea that they had no jurisdiction over the conduct of the taxes. All I has was a notice from Creator of the Universe. Then, the Army Corps of Engineers demanded a map of the proposed flood plain. I sent them a globe. Right now, I am trying to resolve a complaint filed with the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission that I am practicing discrimination by not taking atheists aboard. The IRS has seized my assets, claiming that I’m building the Ark in preparation to flee the country to avoid paying the state that I owe them some kind of user tax and failed to register the Ark as a "recreational water craft." And, finally, the ACLU got the courts to issue an injunction against further construction of the Ark, saying that since God is flooding the earth, it’s a religious event, and, therefore unconstitutional. I really don’t think I can finish the Ark for another five or six years."

Noah waited. The sky began to clear, the sun began to shine, and the seas began to calm. A rainbow arced across the sky. Noah looked up hopefully. "You mean you’re not going to destroy the earth, Lord?" "No," He said sadly. "I don’t have to. The government already has."

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When NASA was preparing for the Apollo project, they did some astronaut training on a Navajo Indian reservation. One day, a Navajo elder and his son were herding sheep and came across the space crew. The old man, who only spoke Navajo, asked a question, which his son translated. "What are the guys in the big suits doing?"

A member of the crew said they were practicing for their trip to the moon. The old man got really excited and asked if he could send a message to the moon with the astronauts. Recognizing a promotional opportunity for the spin-doctors, the NASA folks found a tape recorder. After the old man recorded his message, they asked the son to translate. He refused.

So the NASA reps brought the tape to the reservation, where the rest of the tribe listened and laughed, but refused to translate the elder’s message to the moon.

Finally, NASA called in an official government translator. He reported that the moon message said, "Watch out for these guys; they’ve come to steal your land."

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One day while walking down the street a highly successful executive woman was tragically hit by a bus and she died. Her soul arrived up in heaven where she was met at the Pearly Gates by St. Peter.

 "Welcome to Heaven," said St. Peter. "Before you get settled in though, it seems we have a problem. You see, strangely enough, we’ve never once had an executive make it this far and we’re not really sure what to do with you."

 "No problem, just let me in," said the woman.

"Well, I’d like to, but I have higher orders. What we’re going to do is let you have a day in Hell and a day in Heaven and then you can choose whichever one you want to spend an eternity in."

"Actually, I think I’ve made up my mind…I prefer to stay in Heaven," said the woman.

"Sorry, we have rules…"

And with that St. Peter put the executive in an elevator and it went down to hell. The doors opened and she found herself stepping out onto the putting green of a beautiful golf course. In the distance was a country club and standing in front of her were all of her friends and they were all dressed in fine evening wear and cheering for her. They ran up and kissed her on both cheeks and they talked about old times.

They played an excellent round of golf and at night went to the country club where she enjoyed an excellent steak and lobster dinner. She met the Devil who was actually a really nice guy and she had a great time telling jokes and dancing.

She was having such a good time that before she knew it, it was time to leave. Everybody shook her hand and waved good-bye as she got on the elevator. The elevator went back up to the Pearly Gates and found St. Peter."Now it’s time to spend a day in heaven," he said.

So she spent the next 24 hours lounging around on clouds and playing the harp and singing. She had a great time and before she knew it her 24 hours were up and St. Peter came and got her.

"So, you’ve spent a day in hell and you’ve spent a day in heaven. Now you must choose your eternity," he said.

The woman paused for a second and then replied, "Well, I never thought I’d say this, I mean, Heaven has been really great and all, but I think I had a better time in Hell."

So St. Peter escorted her to the elevator and again she went back to Hell. When the doors of the elevator opened she found herself standing in a desolate wasteland covered in garbage and filth. She saw her friends were dressed in rags and were picking up the garbage and putting it in sacks. The Devil came up to her and put his arm around her.

"I don’t understand," stammered the woman, "yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and a country club and we ate lobster and we danced and had a great time. Now all there is a wasteland of garbage and all my friends look miserable."

The Devil looked at her and smiled."Yesterday we were recruiting you. Today you’re staff."

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Elevator Experience

This is a True Story….. (Note: Hope so. It’s certainly funny!!)

On a weekend in Atlantic City, a woman won a bucketful of quarters at a slot machine. She took a break from the slots for dinner with her husband in the hotel dining room. But first she wanted to stash the quarters in her room.

I’ll be right back and we’ll go to eat." she told her husband and she carried the coin-laden bucket to the elevator. As she was about to walk into the elevator she noticed two men already aboard.

Both were black. One of them was big..very big…and intimidating figure. The woman froze. Her first thought was:

"These two are going to rob me."Her next thought was: "Don’t be a bigot, they look like perfectly nice gentlemen. But racial stereotypes are powerful, and fear immobilized her. She stood and stared at the two men. She felt anxious, flustered and ashamed. She hoped they didn’t read her mind. Surely they knew her hesitation about joining them in the elevator was all too obvious. Her face was flushed. She couldn’t just stand there, so with a mighty effort of will she picked up one foot and stepped forward and followed with the other foot and was on the elevator. Avoiding eye contact, she turned around stiffly and faced the elevator doors as they closed.

A second passed, and then another second, and then another. Her fear increased! The elevator didn’t move. Panic consumed her.

"My God", she thought, "I’m trapped and about to be robbed!"

Her heart plummeted. Perspiration poured from every pore Then….. one of the men said, "Hit the floor." Instinct told her: Do what they tell you. The bucket of quarters flew upwards as she threw out her arms and collapsed on the elevator carpet. A shower of coins rained down on her.

"Take my money and spare me", she prayed. More seconds passed.

She heard one of the men say politely, "Ma’am, if you’ll just tell us what floor you’re going to, we’ll push the button." The one who said it had a little trouble getting the words out. He was trying mightily to hold in a belly laugh. 

She lifted her head and looked up at the two men. They reached down to help her up. Confused, she struggled to her feet. "When I told my man here to hit the floor," said the average sized one, "I meant that he should hit the elevator button for our floor. I didn’t mean for you to hit the floor, ma’am."He spoke genially. He bit his lip. It was obvious he was having a hard time not laughing.

She thought: My God, what a spectacle I’ve made of myself. She was too humiliated to speak. She wanted to blurt out an apology, but words failed her. How do you apologize to two perfectly respectable gentlemen for behaving as though they were going to rob you. She didn’t know what to say.

The three of them gathered up the strewn quarters and refilled her bucket. When the elevator arrived at her floor they insisted on walking her to her room. She seemed a little unsteady on her feet, and they were afraid she might not makeit down the corridor

At her door they bid her a good evening. As she slipped into her room she could hear them roaring with laughter while they walked back to the elevator. The woman brushed herself off. She pulled herself together and went downstairs for dinner with her husband.

The next morning flowers were delivered to her room-a dozen roses. Attached to EACH rose was a crisp one hundred dollar bill. The card said:"Thanks for the best laugh we’ve had in years." It was signed,

Eddie Murphy& Michael Jordan

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The Recruitment

The chief of staff of the US Air Force decided that he would personally intervene in the recruiting crisis affecting all of our armed services. So, he directed that a nearby Air Force base be opened and that all eligible young men and women be invited. As he and his staff were standing near anbrand new F-15 Fighter, a pair of twin brothers who looked like they had just stepped off a Marine Corps recruiting poster walked up to them.

The chief of staff walked up to them, stuck out his hand and introduced himself. He looked at the first young man and asked, "Son, what skills can you bring to the Air Force?"

The young man looks at him and says, "I’m a pilot!"

The general gets all excited, turns to his aide and says, "Get him in today, all the paper work done, everything, do it!" The aide hustles the young man off.

The general looks at the second young man and asked, "What skills to you bring to the Air Force?"

The young man says, "I chop wood!"

"Son," the general replies, "we don’t need wood choppers in the Air Force, what do you know how to do?"

"I chop wood!"

"Young man," huffs the general, "you are not listening to me, we don’t need wood choppers, this is the 20th century!"

"Well," the young man says, "you hired my brother!"

"Of course we did," says the general, "he’s a pilot!"

The young man rolls his eyes and says, "Dang it, I have to chop it before he can pile it!"
 

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Mutant Marsupials Take Up Arms Against Australian Air Force

The reuse of some object-oriented code has caused tactical headaches for Australia’s armed forces. As virtual reality simulators assume larger roles in helicopter combat training , programmers have gone to great lengths to increase the realism of the their scenarios, including detailed landscapes and — in the case of the Northern Territory’s Operation Phoenix — herds of kangaroos (since groups of disturbed animals might well give away a helicopters position).

The head of the Defense Science and Technology Organization’s Land Operations/Simulations division reportedly instructed developers to model the local marsupials’ movements and reaction to helicopters.

Being efficient programmers, they just re- appropriated some code originally used to model infantry detachments reactions under the same stimuli, changed the mapped icon from a soldier to a kangaroo, and increased the figures’ speed of movement.

Eager to demonstrate their flying skills for some visiting American pilots, the hotshot Aussies “buzzed” the virtual kangaroos in low flight during a simulation. The kangaroos scattered, as predicted, and the Americans nodded appreciatively . . . and then did a double-take as the kangaroos reappeared from behind a hill and launched a barrage of stinger missiles at the hapless helicopter. (Apparently the programmers had forgotten the remove “that” part of the infantry coding).

The lesson? Objects are defined with certain attributes, and any new object defined in terms of the old one inherits all the attributes. The embarrassed programmers had learned to be careful when reusing object-oriented code, and the Yanks left with the utmost respect for the Australian wildlife.

Simulator supervisors report that pilots from that point onwards have strictly avoided kangaroos, just as they were meant to.

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It was called to my attention the final chapter of this book, chapter 25 was not visable on my original post Rulers of Evil by F. Tupper Saussy in HTML Web Format The actual text was hidden for some reason. I am posting it here:

“The years pass so quickly – where do they go? – so quickly, and then we get old. We never knew what any of it was about.”
—WOODY ALLEN, RADIO DAYS

WHAT, TO ME, makes the Bible such an inviting resource is the vigor with which the rulers of evil have suppressed its unlicensed reading. It’s been my experience that as predictably as such rulers play with truth, the Bible forthrightly tells it.

The previous chapters have been written in the presumption that ruling institutions are what they say they are (under the Cain covenant they must truthfully identify their origins, which they do with cabalah). It’s only fair, then, that I write this chapter in the presumption that the Bible really is what it says it is. It claims to be the unique, revealed Word of God,1 and the veritable literary embodiment of Jesus Christ.2 If we disbelieve that claim, we must disbelieve all the mottoes, insignia, bulls, encyclicals, laws, acts, ordinations, constitutions, oaths, and decrees of the rulers of evil.

According to God (as given in Scripture), the purpose of law is to regulate evildoers. Hear the apostle Paul:

We also know that law is made not for the righteous but for lawbreakers and rebels, the ungodly and sinful, the unholy and irreligious; for those who kill their fathers or mothers, for murderers, for adulterers and perverts, for slave traders and liars and perjurers – and for whatever else is contrary to the sound doctrine that conforms to the glorious gospel of the blessed God.³

In other words, any behavior not conforming to “the glorious gospel” of God belongs to the law, which, obviously from its subject matter, is a jurisdiction foreign to Jesus Christ.

Scripture teaches us that the glorious gospel commands (1) repenting of sinful lifestyles,⁴ (2) loving neighbor as oneself,5 (3) loving and blessing one’s enemies,6 (4) giving freely without thought of reward,7 (5) forgiving debts and injuries,8 and (6) preaching that whoever believes the evidence of Christ’s life, death, and resurrection enters the royal family of God for all eternity.9 Not every personality is drawn to the glorious gospel,1 0 although Scripture tells us that everyone is asked (in some way) to know it.1 1 For the protection of those drawn to the glorious gospel, and for the management of those foreign to it, there exists the “rule of law.” Rule of law is the system by which authorities bearing Cain’s “powers and insignia of kingship” rule the World. Very briefly, it compares with the glorious gospel in the following ways:

The following table shows how readily the Roman Catholic Church-State organism conforms to the rule of law:

The rule of law is what Scripture calls a “ministration of condemnation.” 1 2 The “strength” of the rule of law is sin.1 3 This is observable in how law is at its most vibrant when ferreting out, prosecuting, and punishing crime. Officials of the rule of law are called “ministers of righteousness, whose end shall be according to their works.”1 4 (I take this to mean “Good works, good end; bad works, bad end.”) As might be expected of a ministry appointed to Cain, who Scripture tells us was “of that wicked one,”1 3 the ministration of condemnation – the rule of law – belongs to Satan. It is a shocking thing to realize that, according to Scripture, world law is Satan’s province. But surprisingly, Scripture also teaches that a certain degree of cordiality exists between God and Satan.

We learn from the book of Job that Satan is welcome in God’s heavenly throne room,¹⁶ even though he has led a rebellion in Heaven for which one third of the angelic population were cast out.¹⁷ His business consists of “going to and fro in the earth, walking up and down in it.”¹⁸ Since he is an angel, and therefore incapable of a bodily existence, Satan can only affect human affairs by (i) providing spiritual direction to human beings who consent to him as “the god of this world,”¹⁹ and (2) manipulating the forces of nature as “prince of the power of the air.”²⁰ To secure popular consent to his spiritual direction, he employs his supernatural abilities to make himself irresistibly attractive. He’s an angel of light,²¹ the author of the humanist extravaganza – pomp and circumstance, breathtaking visual experience, disorienting emotionalism, architecture that overwhelms. He means to convince us (1) that he wields the power of God Almighty on earth, and (2) that we are therefore bound to follow his moral guidance.²² Jesus Christ agreed with the first proposition (and in so doing affirmed, in my opinion, the covenant between God and Cain), but admonished Satan that only the written word of God is fit to guide mankind and Trickster alike.²³ Quite apart from its infallible moral guidance, the written word of God appears to be the only truthful disclosure of Satan’s origin, scope, and purpose. Its potential for damaging his appeal is why the highest rulers of law have traditionally prohibited, or at least not diligently encouraged, Bible reading. THE earliest Christians well understood Rome’s indispensable satanic role in human affairs. In the legal process which Christ established for members of his Church, the harshest sentence an offender could receive was abandonment to Caesarean authority:

If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’ If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, treat him as you would a pagan or a tax collector.²⁴

Writing about “Hymenaeus and Alexander, whom I have handed over to Satan to be taught not to blaspheme,”2 5 the apostle Paul was not talking about committing unruly churchmen to some satanic cult. Nor did he mean by the following counsel that the church at Corinth should engage in demonic incantations:

When you are assembled in the name of our Lord Jesus and I am with you in spirit, and the power of our Lord Jesus is present, hand this man over to Satan, so that the sinful nature may be destroyed and his spirit saved on the day of the Lord.²⁶

In both cases, Paul was heeding Christ’s commandment concerning brethren who rejected both the glorious gospel and the rule of law: turn them over to the Caesarean criminal justice system for their own good and for the good of the church. Thus, the earliest Christians were keenly aware that Rome’s purpose, as the spiritual heir of Cain and the incarnation of the satanic spirit, was (1) to teach the people of God not to blaspheme, (2) to destroy the sinful nature, thereby (3) to save man’s spirit from eternal damnation on judgment day. This violent good-working spirit is characterized at Psalm 2:9 and again at Revelation 2:27 as a “rod of iron” with which Christ rules nations and dashes them to pieces. The Judaean political leaders, anticipating a Messiah who would overthrow Caesar, didn’t understand that Rome was Christ’s rod of iron. Because He would not dash Rome to pieces, they declared Him an impostor, demanded His crucifixion, and gloated when He failed to come off the cross. They could not fathom His consenting to suffer under the violent justice of His own rod. Nor could they foresee that He would use this same rod on September 8, 70 AD in the person of the Roman general Vespasianus Titus, who captured their rebellious city, Jerusalem, and dashed it to pieces.

Paul, whom his non-believing Israelite brethren continually mugged, persecuted, jailed, tortured, and hounded throughout his Mediterranean and Aegean ministry, understood the rod of iron. It was in his letter to the Romans that we find perhaps the most eloquent statement on the New World Order ever written (I cite from the New International Version):

Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist [“powers that be” in the King James Version] have been established by God.

Consequently, he who rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves.

For rulers hold no terror for those who do right, but for those who do wrong. Do you want to be free from fear of the one in authority? Then do what is right and he will commend you.

For he is God’s servant to do you good. But if you do wrong, be afraid, for he does not bear the sword for nothing. He is God’s servant, an agent of wrath to bring punishment on the wrongdoer.

Therefore, it is necessary to submit to the authorities, not only because of possible punishment but also because of conscience.

This is also why you pay taxes, for the authorities are God’s servants, who give their full time to governing.

Give everyone what you owe him: If you owe taxes, pay taxes; if revenue, then revenue; if respect, then respect; if honor, then honor.

Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for he who loves his fellowman has fulfilled the law.²⁷

Since the epoch of Emperor Constantine, the Roman papacy has fostered the concept that the ruler who terrorizes wrongdoers is necessarily a Christian. Pope Sylvester, the Bishop of Rome who supposedly converted Constantine to Christianity, saw nothing strange in a warrior coming to faith in a crucified Christ by slaughtering his enemies.”2 8 This thinking pervaded Sylvester’s successors, as well as the Crusades, the Holy Roman Empire, European nationalism, the American Revolution, the War of Southern Secession, and the wars of the twentieth century. Indeed, perhaps the black papacy’s most admirable psychological conquest is that Protestants generally agree that armed rulership is an authority instituted by God for Christians to exercise. Since there is no scriptural authority for a member of the Body of Christ to bear any kind of armament whatsoever other than the figurative weaponry of God’s Word, agreeing to such a principle signifies prima facie adherence to the moral guidance of him who bears the power of Almighty God on earth, the person who legitimately bears the mark of Cain in a long succession begun with Peter. Yes, the popes can truthfully declare that “Peter” is their foundation by holding in mental reservation that the Hebrew DJr, pronounced “payter,” means… firstling,²⁹ which of course is Cain’s primary attribute as firstborn of Eve.

Supporters of the argument favoring lethal-force Christian rulership usually stand on a single scriptural passage. It’s that verse in Luke 22 wherein, as the betrayal nears, Christ admonishes his disciples, “If you don’t have a sword, sell your cloak and buy one.”³⁰ I have often heard Christian militiamen (some of whom I am not ashamed to call my friends) use this to justify arming themselves against the minions of unjust rulers. But Jesus explained otherwise in the very next verse: “It is written: ‘And he was numbered with the transgressors’ [see Isaiah 53:12]; and I tell you that this must be fulfilled in me.” In order to fulfill prophecy, Christ had to be numbered among lawbreakers, which bearing swords would certainly make of the disciples of any true Prince of Peace. As soon as the disciples produced two swords – the minimum number constituting the plural “transgressors” – prophecy was fulfilled. Christ then told them “It is enough.” From then on, no more cloaks were sold, no more swords bought.

ROMAN Christianity’s success at avenging evil has resulted in a world that severely mistrusts the Christian gospel. It’s to Rome’s advantage that the Christian gospel be mistrusted, for any soul that mistrusts Christ is Rome’s lawful prey. It’s to Rome’s advantage that governing bodies be rebelled against as tyrannical, for rebellion against tyrants is disobedience to the glorious gospel. Much as I despaired over the vicious taking of innocent life in the Waco massacre, I had no choice but to see it as a rather standard Church-Militant inquisitorial procedure against perceived rebelliousness. ATF Special Agent Davy Aguilera’s affidavit,³¹ which resulted in the warrant under which governing bodies invaded the Davidian compound, dutifully listed the scriptural errors of David Koresh. According to the affidavit, Vernon Howell adopted the name David Koresh because he “believed that the name helped designate him as the messiah or the anointed one of God” (p2). Yet one group member stated that Koresh’s teaching “did not always coincide with the Bible” (p11). This allegation is supported by Aguilera’s finding that the “anointed one of God” and his followers had spent at least $44,000 on guns and explosives during 1992 alone, including hand grenades and rifle grenades, gunpowder and potassium nitrate (p6). Where in Scripture are the anointed ones of Christ told to stock up on destructive weaponry? According to Aguilera’s inquisition, “David Koresh stated that the Bible gave him the right to bear arms” (p15). Where in the glorious gospel is an anointed one of God given the right to bear arms? Koresh prophesied the immanent end of the world, “that it would be a ‘military type operation’ and that all the ‘non-believers’ would have to suffer” (p9). Where in Scripture are Christians commanded to make war against non-believers?

From the Inquisition’s standpoint, the Davidians paid lip-service to Jesus Christ but demonstrated a substantive infidelity to Him by infringing upon the ancient Cain franchise – the mark – which flows through the United States government from the black papacy. Against Christ’s commandment, even while professing scriptural knowledge, the Davidians chose to brandish deadly weapons – weapons that Cain could envision pointed at himself someday. How could any mark-bearing ruler resist mobilizing sevenfold vengeance in self-defense? How could Cain resist holding these professed Christians responsible under Christ’s warning at Revelation 13:10: “He that killeth by the sword must be killed by the sword”? Is it any wonder that government regards memories of Waco as little more than annoyances to be stonewalled?

YET one can live intelligently, freely, and safely in a World legitimately governed by the Trickster. The secret is revealed in the resource which the Trickster has labored so tirelessly to marginalize: the Holy Bible. I cite again that remarkable verse in Habakkuk (2:4), in which God tells us that although governing bodies have the wrong desires, we can live safely in their faith that God will not punish them for annihilating their mortal enemies.

Scripture reduces all human interaction to two great ministries: the ministry of Condemnation”3 2 and the ministry of Reconciliation. ³³ Condemnation is the rulership of evil by law; it judges and does justice. Since its subject is the criminal mind (“the strength of the law is sin”), Condemnation requires the brilliance of the firstling, Cain, along with the deviousness of Jesuitry and Sun-Tzu. Condemnation enforces its authority with deadly force – it “does not bear the sword for nothing.”

The ministry of Reconciliation teaches and administers the glorious gospel of Christ. Reconciliation does not judge executably or do justice. Rather, it judges spiritually, it loves, nurtures, suffers patiently, forgives, and rejoices in the truth. Reconciliation never fails because its strength is not sin but the power of God.

The ministry of Condemnation operates “out from the presence of the Lord.” Its only proof of divine association is an inert substance, a seal, a pallium, a miter, a collar, a badge, the mark of Cain, the insignia of its authority to terrorize evildoers. The ministry of Reconciliation is directly animated by the Lord operating within. It proves divine association by everything it does: its mere existence is its seal.

There are exceptions, of course: Condemnors who Reconcile and Reconcilers who Condemn. Many loving Roman Catholic priests dedicate their lives to a form of reconciliation, Confession and Absolution. But aren’t these sacraments really a process of Condemnation in which the confessant pleads guilty and is sentenced on the spot by the priestly judge to certain penitential acts which pardon the guilt? Reconciliation according to Scripture forgives the sin free of charge and directs the confessant’s energies not to punishments but toward a repentant, constructive life within the mind of Christ. I suspect there are lots of Catholic priests who do true Reconciliation, even though it’s technically heretical. My elderly British Jesuit friend stationed at the Gesu was a Reconciler of sorts: he took confession every weekday afternoon by the clock in Italian, a language he didn’t understand.

My father was a good lawyer who denied himself many a handsome legal fee by trying to reconcile marriages out of divorce court. He was a minister of Condemnation by trade, yet the word of God written on his heart made a Reconciler out of him almost in spite of himself. This, I believe, is what Scripture calls “every knee bow[ing] at the name of Jesus Christ, in heaven and on earth, and under the earth.”³⁴ It’s proof of the great power of Reconciliation that the World highly esteems Condemnors who Reconcile, Condemnors for whom the name of Jesus Christ may not be important or even credible. (My private opinion is that many who find Christ uninteresting have been sold an inferior gospel by hypocritical preaching. I tend to agree with G.K. Chesterton’s remark, “It’s not that Christianity has been tried and found wanting, but that it’s hardly been tried at all.”)

Despite crossovers, Condemnation and Reconciliation work together as opposites, like male and female, sea and land, night and day, yin and yang. Condemnation punishes us for alienating God; Reconciliation lovingly brings us together with God. Condemnation cannot bring us to God, but it can drive us to Him. Reconciliation cannot punish us for alienating God, but it can release us to Condemnation, which walks to and fro in search of corrupt Reconcilers to persecute along with the usual suspects. Release is a conciliatory operation. The spiritual judgments of Reconciliation are executed in release, while the natural judgments of Condemnation are executed by the opposite of release: restriction – restriction of body, comfort, freedom, property, options, life.

Restriction is the flexure of Condemnation’s muscle, and this is good for Reconciliation. It provides God a captive audience. I saw it in a dozen jail cells in Tennessee, Oklahoma, Georgia, Mississippi, and California. Condemnation can so restrict that its subject cries out for Reconciliation. In jail, God is not a philosophical proposition to be deliberated at leisure. He’s a vivid benefit grasped as though He were a key to the jailhouse lock. I have seen it so often, under so many circumstances, that I have to regard it as a principle: The More Restriction, the Closer to God.³⁵ So even though the ministry of Condemnation is directed by Satan to do justice among evildoers (and what could be more just than for Satan to rule evil?), the ultimate beneficiary is He who ordained the whole system in the first place.

For, just as Paul says, Satan is an angel of light and his ministers are ministers of righteousness whose end shall be according to their works. Scripture is a catalog of satanic ministers who were absolutely necessary for Christ to perform His finished work: the Serpent, Cain and Enoch, Ham, Nimrod, Esau, Pharaoh, the Amalekites, Nebuchadnezzar, Belshazzar, Cyrus, Ahasueras, Haman, Judas, and many, many others. Some were deplorably wicked, other surprisingly moral – it was Judas’ sense of guilt that drove him to suicide. The Jesuit priest who inaugurated my prosecution on the Feast Day of St. Ignatius was a satanic minister, and he was absolutely necessary for my maturity as a Christian. He sent me on a fifteen-year journey that has brought me to this page.

ONCE I understood the two ministries, hard questions answered themselves. What can a responsible citizen do to restore moral, fair, constitutional government? First, realize that no judgment that government is immoral, unfair, or unconstitutional can be executed unless by an authorized person. Only Condemnation has authority to alter government’s patterns of conduct. To change government by conventional means, I must become a Condemnor. (Can anyone name a true Reconciler who is great in the World?) To gain influence among Condemnors, I must master the arts of Sun-Tzu and the Trickster. Little good this will do, for as my investigation has tended to show, always the preponderance of Condemnation’s resources go into keeping the system evil. If I build forces capable of meaningfully altering the system, the masters will terminate me because they are authorized by God to avenge sevenfold those who would slay Cain. In short, the potential for improvement within the system of Condemnation appears to be limited to cyclical periods of pretty good times, pretty bad times. Isn’t this obvious from history and the news?

Of course, God could change government by a simple miracle, and Revelation says He will, on the “last day,” the fearful day of cosmic shakedown when unrepentant evildoers will burn with their beast and only the perfect will remain. Scripture is silent as to when that day will come. In the meantime, Reconcilers are told that improving human rulership is their responsibility. Not by taking control of the system, and not by sealing themselves off in well-fortified communes, either. Reconcilers improve the system by making themselves… available. Reconcilers are attractive to Condemnation because they don’t judge or attempt to do justice. They don’t put down, attach blame, or pin guilt. Consequently, Reconcilers are not perceived as a threat. They are wise as serpents and harmless as doves.³⁶

This is not to say that Reconcilers condone evil. Their posture toward sin is this: People know right from wrong. People don’t need to be told they’re sinful. People know. God’s law written on their hearts continually reminds them. What the World needs is the friendship of someone who is God-minded (if not well-versed in the Word of God), someone confident in the Love of God who can patiently and non-judgmentally hold the most evil of souls in friendship while helping it work through repentance to healthier values at its own pace.

Many years in Condemnation have driven me into the ministry of Reconciliation, and the heart of Reconciliation is love. I now appreciate the simple wisdom in Felix Mendelssohn’s question, “Why should any man offend the people in power?” Offending people in power – offending anyone – is no longer attractive to me. I do good, or at least try to with our Lord’s help. The most reliable instruction I’ve yet found for this purpose is the Bible with its glorious gospel, and the Bible tells me that if I do good (not good as I see it, but good as the gospel defines it: Love God with all your heart, soul, and mind; love your neighbor as yourself), the rulers of evil will commend me.

And so I freely subject myself to Condemnation for examination of my conscience. Who knows? I might just interest the examiner in the joys of Reconciliation. Taxes? I continue to pay every tax for which I am liable, and none for which I’m not.

Finally, I anticipate that some may disagree with certain of the conclusions in this and other chapters. I welcome disagreement. Disagreement is the mother of this book. Nobody is paying me to market any particular doctrine. I’m not the kind of person who has to be right. I let the evidence lead me. The evidence shaped my conclusions. The evidence wrote this book. To anyone who knows of countervailing evidence, evidence that might point me in a different direction, this is my request to see it. I’m not above repenting again, nor would I shrink from printing retractions. I want Reconciliation, and I want Truth.

If St. Francis Xavier can say “I would not even believe in the Gospels were the Holy Church to forbid it,” with no less commitment I can say that I would not believe even the Bible were Truth to forbid it.

(NOTE from the webmaster: I certainly don’t agree with the last paragraph! I can hardly believe Tupper Saussy would write that! The statement is totally illogical for a Christian to say. I can understand why Francis Xavier would say what he said because as a Catholic he values what the Pope and his church has to say more than what the Bible has to say. But for Christian to say he would not believe the Bible if the truth were to forbid it makes no sense because our ONLY source of truth in this evil world IS the Bible!!!)

THE END!

To read the notes, please see the PDF file.

If you have heard of the doctrine of dispensationalism but are unsure what it means, the video in this article will teach you everything you need to know. I learned so much from it!

It’s very important that this doctrine be exposed as false and teachers such as Gene Kim who teach it as false teachers. Dispensationalism is the root of several false doctrines such as Zionism, pre-tribulation rapture, a difference between the Kingdom of God and the Kingdom of Heaven, and the modern state of Israel being central to Endtime Bible prophecy.

Transcript

Hi, I’m evangelist Bruce Mejia from Faithful Word Baptist Church in Amani California. The film you’re about to watch is a documentary exposing the heresy of dispensationalism. Faithful Word Baptist Church has teamed up with Verity Baptist Church in Sacramento California to expose this heresy but also to educate Christians regarding this dangerous doctrine that has permeated many churches. Feel free to share this video with family and friends. Subscribe to the channel for future films. God bless and hope you enjoy.

We need to reject, fight against, and demolish dispensation.

Part 1 Introduction

What is dispensationalism

The part of the chapter we’re gonna focus on is found in 2nd Peter chapter 3 verse 14 where the Bible reads,

2 Peter 3:14  Wherefore, beloved, seeing that ye look for such things, be diligent that ye may be found of him in peace, without spot, and blameless.
15  And account that the longsuffering of our Lord is salvation; even as our beloved brother Paul also according to the wisdom given unto him hath written unto you;
16  As also in all his epistles, speaking in them of these things; in which are some things hard to be understood, which they that are unlearned and unstable wrest, …

At kind of the base level, what is dispensationalism? Where did dispensational theology come from? This view that we’re calling dispensational pre-tribulational premillennialism has been the dominant perspective in American evangelicalism for about the last one hundred and fifteen to twenty years. And you will not find the idea that we are going to escape the Antichrist until approximately a hundred and forty years ago when a fifteen year old girl had a revelation. And that revelation was picked up by JN Darby, the founder of the Plymouth Brethren, and developed into a form of theology known as dispensational theology.

Mr. Darby took took his gospel of the rapture to the United States. And he came in contact with the Billy Graham of his day. His name was Dwight L Moody, founder of the Moody Bible Institute, and Moody press and all of that. Moody became the sort of worldwide disseminator of this theology of dispensationalism and a pre-tribulation rapture on both sides of the Atlantic and for a very long time. And then we were off and running.

Dispensationalism is essentially is a method of interpretation of understanding the Bible which translates the Bible literally in its historic and poetic and wisdom literature, all of it, and reads it at face value interpretively, and understands Israel to be taken a priority in God’s program, and then gets to the church and the churches is separate.

Now let me say this: Dispensationalism is a man-made structure for understanding the Bible. This needs to be understood right off the bat. It’s man-made.

(Transcribed up to 5 minutes and 15 seconds. In this case watching the video is better than reading the transcript because some of the speakers are falsely trying to prove dispensationalism.)

Dispensation of Heresy Documentary

From my observation, most websites exposing the evils of this world deal only with the evil fruits or leaves of the tree of evil. Rather than try to cut off the fruits, leaves, or even the branches of evil, isn’t it more effective to chop at the very roots of the evil tree? That way you get rid of all the poisonous fruits and all their evil branches in one shot!

Some people call the planners of evil, “Jews”, some say, “not Jews, only the Zionists”, some Americans call them “liberals” or Democrats, others say, “Illuminati”, some say “Freemasons”, some say “Bilderburgers”, some say “the Committee of 300”, you may say ____________ (fill in the blank with your favorite bad guys). Are any of these correct?

First of all, I consider it wrong and illogical to label an entire ethnic group of people as the source of the problem. Secondly, I consider all the other above mentioned groups and secret societies to be merely the branches of the evil tree, not the tree itself. So what is the tree? The Bible calls the evil tree, “MYSTERY, BABYLON THE GREAT, THE MOTHER OF HARLOTS AND ABOMINATIONS OF THE EARTH.” – Revelation 17:5

What exactly is “Mystery, Babylon the Great”? I see it as a combination of false religion and a totalitarian government system started by Satan from the time when Babylon became a world class empire. This system was passed down to the Medo-Persian Empire, then the Greek Empire, then the Roman Empire and finally the successors of the Roman Empire. The Caesars turned into Popes and changed the name of the empire to the Holy Roman Empire, now called the “Holy See” AKA, the Roman Catholic Church. The papal emperor continued to rule Europe and sought control of the rest of the world, including Japan, when Jesuit priests first came to the Japanese island of Kyushu in 1549.

In 1517 Martin Luther wrote his Ninety-Five Theses and posted it on the door of a Roman Catholic church. This was the beginning of the Protestant Reformation. The Reformation took off quickly because the printing press was already invented by that time and copies of Luther’s Ninety-Five Theses were distributed all over Europe!

In 1540 the Jesuit Order started by Ignatius of Loyola was approved by Pope Paul III. The Jesuit Order, also known as the Society of Jesus, was created in reaction to the Protestant Reformation! The Jesuits are akin to an army seeking to destroy the biblical faith promoted by Martin Luther and other reformers of the Protestant Reformation!

The Council of Trent was a series of meetings by Catholic Bishops from 1545 to 1563. It was the counter-reformation against so called Protestant heresies at the time of the Reformation.

The following was taken from http://www.theforbiddenknowledge.com/hardtruth/council_of_trent.htm which has become a broken URL no longer online. Emphasis in bold are mine.

The Council of Trent was the response of Rome to the Protestant Reformation. Remember—the Protestant Reformation brought us all of the political liberty that we know of today. There’s no such thing as national sovereignty without the Reformation. There’s no such thing as private rights without the Reformation. There’s no such thing as the Law of Nations, as we know of it today, of Montesquieu and the others, without the Reformation. So, when the Reformation came with their doctrines of salvation by grace through faith alone, and that there was no need for the priesthood to go to Heaven—that all we need is salvation in Christ, and Romans 1:17: the righteous shall live by faith. When the Reformation came, it completely stripped Rome of its spiritual power. The priests were no longer wanted because the people were getting the word of God in a Bible, specifically in Holland, England, and Germany. And so, with these great revivals breaking forth and the Reformation happening, nations were breaking away from the power of the Pope. The Holy Roman Empire was breaking up. Charles V, the Emperor, resigned and became a monk and a gardener. So, the Lord was moving mightily in breaking the power of the Holy Roman Empire, started by Charlemagne and the Pope. The Council of Trent consists of 25 Sessions. Those 25 Sessions accurse and condemn all the doctrines of the Reformation.

It condemns anybody who does not believe that the literal Jesus Christ is in the host [holy communion bread], and that his literal blood is in the wine. That’s called transubstantiation. Anybody who does not believe that is an accursed anathema. Anybody who believes that their salvation is outside the Catholic Church is accursed anathema. Anybody who believes in justification by grace through faith—anathema, accursed. Anybody who believes that the Pope is not the vicar of Christ—accursed, anathema. You see, all of these doctrines were being put forth as a result of reading the Bible, which produced the Reformation, and so the Jesuits accursed everything that the Reformers were preaching. This is all in Law called the Council of Trent. In the 4th Session, which is probably the most important Session, the Jesuits condemn freedom of speech, freedom of the press, and freedom of conscience. So, no man has the right to choose his own religion; no man has the right to publish what he feels is the truth; and no man has the right to freedom of conscience.

The Council of Trent in the Santa Maria Maggiore church; Museo Diocesano Tridentino, Trento.

This article is a documentary on YouTube entitled, “The Scary TRUTH About The Catholic Church” Please see the video below the text.

Transcription

The Vatican and her people all deserve the Academy Award Oscar for the best performance of innocency and piety, and also for makeup and wardrobe design making her outward appearance that of Snow White. Underneath her snow-white outfit there are running festering sores and ringworm. On the outside she smiles sweetly and says, “I love you brother”, but behind her bony back she hides hands that drip with the blood of martyrs.

The Vatican is posing as Snow White but the Bible says that she’s a prostitute, the Great Whore, a cult, Revelation 19:2. She uses government agency branches in every country including the United States as her vicious little Dwarfs. The more power and control she gets in government, the more she will fade into the background in her snow-white disguise so that government will be used and blamed for all her evil deeds.

Reason: To enforce laws that harass, malign, destroy, and censor everyone and every idea that is not Roman Catholic, so she can sit as The Satanic Queen, the big Whore.

Because of her age old desire to control the world government and Church, the serpent-like Vatican has infested the world and US government with so many of her zealous highly trained and dedicated Jesuit devotees, that she now controls the United Nations which she created, the White House, Congress, every state, federal, civic, and social government agency, including the US Department of Labor, the IRS, the FBI, the Supreme Court, judicial systems, the Armed Forces, state, federal, and other police, also the international banking and Federal Reserve systems called the Illuminati and agentor, labor unions, the Mafia, and most of the heavyweight news media.

This cult, the Vatican, is very close to replacing our a US Constitution with her one-world satanic canon laws of death to the heretic, anyone who is not Roman Catholic.

General Lafayette, President George Washington’s most respected aide and general, prophetically stated,

“If the liberties of the American people are ever destroyed they will fall by the hand of Roman Catholic cults clergy.”

Today we see the climax of detailed plans given in excerpts from a speech given nearly fifty years ago in Australia by Roman Catholic Archbishop Gilroy.

“The Roman Catholic motto is ourselves alone for fellow Roman Catholics. We must defeat all heretics, non Roman Catholics, at the ballot box. The Holy Father states that negative tactics are fatal. The demands of the Holy Father the Pope are that the public services should be 100 percent Roman Catholic soon. Care must be taken that no suspicion may be raised when Roman Catholics are secretly given more government jobs than Protestants, Jews, and other heretics.

Multi millions of people have been slaughtered by the Vatican. Thus saith the Lord,

Revelation 18:24  And in her was found the blood of prophets, and of saints, and of all that were slain upon the earth.

History bears record to this fact. During the Roman Catholic Inquisition in Europe, 68 million people were tortured, maimed, and murdered by this huge sect. The St. Bartholomew’s Day Massacre (23–24 August 1572) accounted for the butchering of as many as 100,000 Protestants. (See Wikipedia article about it.)

Abraham Lincoln blamed the papacy for the civil war in these words:

“This war would never have been possible without the sinister and secretive influence of the Jesuits. We owe it to popery that we now see our land reddened with the blood of her noblest sons.

Lincoln added:

I am for Liberty of conscience in its noblest, broadest, and highest sense, but I cannot give liberty of conscience to the Pope, and to his followers, the Papists, so long as they tell me through their councils, theologians, and canon laws, that their conscience orders them to burn my wife, strangle my children, and cut my throat, when they find their opportunity.

Because of Abraham Lincoln’s many exposes of the Vatican, he was put to death just as he foretold. Yes assassinated by the Jesuits.

(Transcribed up to 6 minutes and 5 seconds.)

You don’t want to miss watching this! There are lots of pictures that add to the narration.

The New World Order is the globalist agenda by a secretive Luciferian power elite that is conspiring to eventually rule the world through an authoritarian one-world government that will replace sovereign nation-states. The Bible calls it “the Beast” in the book of Revelation chapter 13. Since 2020, New World Order is also referred to as the “Great Reset”.

This documentary was made in 2011 and covers many issues. It’s by no means dated. The agenda of the Luciferian globalists has not changed, it’s only become more out in the open. And yet the vast majority of the world still can’t see it!

Topics discussed

Is there a connection between UFOs, alien abductions, channeling spirits, demonic possessions, the new age movement, secret societies, and satanism? In Age of Deceit: Fallen Angels and the New World Order, we investigate why the New World Order and the Global Elite are tirelessly working to form a One World Government and who they are getting this instruction from. A biblical look at the history of fallen angels and it’s relationship to the New World Order and the new age movement. Topics covered are the fall of mankind, the pre-flood world as Atlantis, the new age through theosophy, the fallen angels and their origin of planting the seeds to society, UFOs, ETs and abduction cases, demonic possession, channeling, and more.

Former Roman Catholic Priest Richard Bennett (March 10, 1938 – September 23, 2019) shares his knowledge of Vatican control of the world through legal agreements. His bio.

This is a transcript of Richard Bennett’s talk. The video is below the text.

This is a difficult topic that I address tonight, the topic of legal civil law that the Vatican uses to bring the true Gospel into disuse and to bring more and more people unto herself, and that she is used in the past to persecute true believers. And I’m going to tie this up with Scripture, particularly from Revelation chapter 17.

Now, I know this is a strong message. It’s a message I’ve never given before. But I think it is absolutely necessary.

Even when I was just one year a priest, my very first year where I was a priest in the city of Rome itself. I went out into St. Peter’s Square at the end of one of the sessions of Vatican Council II, and I saw the square flood with the three thousand prelates of the church. They were flowing out of the Vatican, St. Peter’s. And they were dressed in scarlet, Cardinals, and the Archbishops and bishops in purple. And even as a Catholic priest, knowing something of the Bible, I had read Revelation 17, I was shocked! It wasn’t Hollywood. This was real. I was seeing before my eyes scarlet and purple, and I knew it wasn’t just the Vatican alone the main cathedral of the Pope and the Lateran (the church of the pope as the bishop of Rome), and she sits on the Seven Hills. And I knew something of the civil agreements she had made with Nations. And I was shocked even as a priest with the little that I knew of the Word. And I just put it out of my mind.

There are so few people today willing to speak about this topic but I think it has got to be said and clearly said relying on the written clarity of God’s Word.

Lord Acton, one of the most famous of Roman Catholic historians in history, he declared emphatically that it was through agreements the Vatican made with powers, kings, and princes, that in the past she was able for 600 years to torture and bring death upon true believers. Lord Acton, a Roman Catholic historian, and she was able to silence the true Gospel and bring people to herself.

John Emerich Edward Dalberg-Acton, 1st Baron Acton, 13th Marquess of Groppoli, KCVO, DL (10 January 1834 – 19 June 1902), better known as Lord Acton, was an English Catholic historian, politician, and writer. – Source: Wikipedia

Now, it is really sad that in her own day she is again taking civil power onto herself, and becoming equipped in law, civil law, in a real distinctive way capable of bringing severe consequences on believers. And very few are even aware of it.

So I call this presentation the Vatican control through civil law. I begin with a quotation from a European Union business web page, it’s on the Internet EUbusiness.com Quotation:

Pope John Paul II outlined his dream for a Europe without egotistical nationalism and based on Christian values as he received the Charlemagne Prize for his services to Europe at the Vatican, Wednesday, March the 24th, 2004. The 83 year old head of the Roman Catholic Church was chosen for his outstanding life’s work promoting European understanding in the service of humanity and world peace at a ceremony drawing members of the diplomatic community and officials from Aachen, a German City which awards the annual prize.

The European Union web page talking about the Pope was saving the Charlemagne Award. Of course Charlemagne being the one who was crowned by another Pope way back Christmas Day in the year 800. (The Pope is) Roman Catholic to the hilt and the workings of the Roman Catholic Church together with a European leader in the past. And the Pope gets his award at the present day.

Another quotation, and this time from the 31st of August 2003, and reported by a leading Catholic news agency on the internet called Zenith. Quotation:

John Paul and Trust the Future of the New Europe to Mary. He placed Europe in Mary’s hands so that it would become a symphony of Nations committed to building together the civilization of love and peace. Last Sunday the Holy Father urged the final draft of the European Constitution that it should recognize explicitly the Christian roots of the continent as they constitute a guarantee for the future.

The Pope insisting that the Christian roots of the European Union be recognized. What does the Roman Catholic Church mean by Christian? We simply have to go to her official decrees because she explains clearly what she means by Christian. I quote from a very famous recent document published by the Vatican on the 5th of September in the year 2000 called Dominus Iesus. It makes it clear that this idea of the Christian roots is just a facade! Catholicism (or “Christian roots”) means the Catholic Church, and that alone. Her mind is expressed in that document. She “condemns” the tendency to read and interpret Sacred Scripture outside the tradition and Magisterium of the church. Anyone that dares read their Bible outside the interpretation given by the church, she condemns them.

And then she says officially for the whole world to hear,

“Therefore there exists a single Church of Christ which subsists in the Catholic Church governed by the successor of Peter and the bishops in communion with him. In (inaudible) Rome there exists one single church.

And she says that is the Catholic Church. And just as the Nazis declared non-aryans to be non human beings so now in this official decree Rome declares other churches to be non churches.

Quotation from this document:

The ecclesial communities which have not preserved the valid episcopus and the genuine and interval substance of the Eucharistic mysteries are not churches in the proper sense.

So this church and any church that doesn’t have a valid episcopacy (A system of church government in which bishops are the chief clerics.) and a sacrifice of Christ in the Eucharist and adoration of Christ in a wafer, is not a valid church according to the Roman Church. She is absolutely clear in what she says. And so her looking for the Christian roots is looking for the Roman Catholic power and roots in the European Union.

Rome’s mind is expressed and clearly expressed in her teachings. And she plans again to bring Europe under her control. Even secular newspapers in England and elsewhere are quite conscious of the mind of the Vatican.

And I’d like to quote from The Sunday Telegraph in London.

“The Pope is calmly preparing to assume the mantle which he solemnly believes to be his by divine right, that of new Holy Roman Emperor, reigning from the Urals to the Atlantic.” Sunday Telegraph newspaper in England, July the 21st, 1991.

(Note: This could be one reason for the Ukraine invasion! Putin knows the Pope wants Ukraine and he doesn’t want him to have it. [Just saying.] )

And I could give many more quotations. Even secular newspapers saying that the Vatican’s mind is reign in Europe. Now this reign is not simply in publishing decrees but it is in implementing her law to the civil law of a nation. And so this is what she thrived on in the past in the dark and Middle Ages. The control that she had during the more than 600 years of Inquisition against believers and the growth of her system was through civil law that she had implemented with Kings and with princes of old, and by keeping people in subjection to her deceptive sacramental system. For salvation, you look to Holy Mother Church and the seven rituals that she has. And it was this control that she exercised for more than 600 years in massive torture and in the deaths of many millions of true Bible believers.

Her ambitions in Europe at the present day in the European Union is just a sequel to the control she already has in most of European Union nations that are already part of the European Union including my own Ireland, but also in those that are coming in to the Union. She has already absolute control, for example, right across Poland. And so, just as in the past she brought kings and princes to heel by her commands and dictates and her laws, she now brings nations under her control through civil law.

In the past she could and did remove people’s oath of allegiance to their sovereign leader so that they were freed from their allegiance of the civil power if the civil power did not obey them. Such was her power. And since the 20th century we have seen a strategy that is quite similar to the preparation in which he prepared for those centuries of torture and of persecution. So we have a patron just as before she got many kings and princes to sign on to her legal agreements. So particularly in the 20th century and in her own century, the 21st, she is again very strong in her bringing in her power through the civil law of nations.

She does this primarily by what is called a concordant. A concordant is a civil agreement made between the Vatican and any particular nation. It guarantees the Roman Catholic Church with the right and freedom of her type of worship. It includes defining of things like doctrine, the establishing of Roman Catholic education and hospitals, it includes property rights, appointing of bishops and the recognition of the Catholic law over marriage, particularly of the Catholic annulment.

Such agreements have been made in the 20th century and some of them really famous concordants. in Latvia 1922, Bavaria 1924, Poland 1925, Romania 1927, Lithuania 1927, Italy – the famous one with Mussolini – 1929, Baden (a historical territory in South Germany and North Switzerland, on both sides of the Upper Rhine) 1932, Austria 1933, Germany the same year 1933, in Yugoslavia 1935. The Vatican has prepared to do in civil agreements with its own dictators who are also Roman Catholic, and some of the most famous Vatican concordants or civil agreements have been made between the Vatican and dictators, for the most part who were despots who ruled Catholic nations.

And I’d like to give you some of the more famous of these, those who were Roman Catholic of the Catholics own fold that the Catholic did civil agreements with:

Adolf Hitler in Germany from 1933 to 1945,
Benito Mussolini in Italy from 1922 to 1943,
Francisco Franco in Spain from 1936 to 1975
Antonio Salazar in Portugal from 1932 to 1968
Juan Peron in Argentina from 1946 to 1955
and Ante Pavelić in Croatia from 1941 to 1945.

Each one of those nations has horrors all of its own. What happened through these civil concordants in the 20th century? It wasn’t simply the millions of Jews, but the believers that suffered also under Hitler. What the believers suffered under Franco and Mussolini and probably the most gruesome torture to believers and to the Orthodox in Croatia has been some of the more horrific massacres and torture ever known on planet Earth under the civil agreements that the Roman Catholic Church had with Ante Pavelić in Croatia make your stomach turn even to read of them.

(Transcribed up to 21 minutes. I may add more later.)

Richard Bennett’s talk

This is a talk by Brian Denlinger of King James Video Ministries. I transcribed 13 minutes of it from his YouTube video. If this topic interests you, you can listen to his entire talk from the YouTube below the text.

Today I’d like to talk to you about how Roman Catholicism uses both the systems of Fascism and Communism to control the masses. A lot of people think that these two systems are contrary the one to the other, and they on paper seem to be, but if you actually look at it you realize that it’s actually controlled by the same system. And I will be proving that today.

If you’re familiar with this symbol right here, the symbol of the cross which the Catholics are very much into doing, and you have to remember that Jesus Christ was not crucified on a Christian cross. He was crucified by pagan Romans on a pagan cross.

Okay, that’s very important. Now there are Christians out there that will have a cross in their home or they’ll make a little wooden cross or whatever else, I’ve had been contacted many times by people saying, “should I have a cross in my home?” Well, if you’re having it as some kind of a satanic symbol or something, well then, no, but if it’s just there as a reminder what Jesus died that Jesus died on the cross and that you’re as His disciple you’re to take up your cross daily and follow Him, you’re to crucify your flesh, okay, fine. If it’s not an idol, then okay, not a problem. But the Roman Catholic Church is not some kind of another denomination, another kind of church, they are a world government power, the Roman empire, the two legs of iron in the book of Daniel, they never went away. Gold became silver, silver became brass, brass became iron, and then after that iron became iron and miry clay. It didn’t go away like the other kingdoms did. We are not waiting for the fifth kingdom, in the book of Daniel the five kingdoms that are prophesied that Nebuchadnezzar has the dream and then Daniel interprets the dream. You can study that. We’re not waiting for the fifth kingdom (the iron mixed with clay), we are in the fifth kingdom! There’s no break there. It doesn’t say, well. the Roman empire crumbles and just dissolves and then thousands of years go by and the fifth kingdom shows up. No, the fifth kingdom, we’re in it. Don’t let prophecy teachers mess you up on that that there’s going to be a fifth kingdom someday. Oh no no, it’s here right now. It has been since the basically the fourth century or so when the Roman empire became the two separate parts of the kingdom and then became the Catholic Church.

(Note from the Webmaster: Brian is refering to Daniel 2:40-43. He calls the iron mixed with miry clay the “fifth kingdom” but the Bible doesn’t call it that. It’s part of the fourth kingdom. I believe it’s more reasonable to say the kingdom of iron and clay began with the Protestant Reformation when the nations of northern Europe stopped submitting to the Pope.)

Daniel 2:40  And the fourth kingdom shall be strong as iron: forasmuch as iron breaketh in pieces and subdueth all things: and as iron that breaketh all these, shall it break in pieces and bruise.
41  And whereas thou sawest the feet and toes, part of potters’ clay, and part of iron, the kingdom shall be divided; but there shall be in it of the strength of the iron, forasmuch as thou sawest the iron mixed with miry clay.
42  And as the toes of the feet were part of iron, and part of clay, so the kingdom shall be partly strong, and partly broken.
43  And whereas thou sawest iron mixed with miry clay, they shall mingle themselves with the seed of men: but they shall not cleave one to another, even as iron is not mixed with clay.

They have been using this system for centuries. It’s very important to understand this. And again if you study anything about Catholicism they teach that they have spiritual and temporal power symbolized by two swords. They also have two keys which they get into the thing of the keys of death and hell and heaven and whatever else, but they believe that the Pope in Rome believes he has power over all religion and also over all governments spiritual and temporal.

Now I’m going to show you how the whole system breaks down as we continue here. We’re going to start out first with Communism symbolized here by the purple. Again the colors of Mystery Babylon is purple and scarlet. So we’ll start out here with the spiritual with Communism. How does Roman Catholicism use Communism? How do they employ it out there with the masses? Well, first of all, they use monastic orders. You’re a Catholic, you’re a faithful Catholic, and you want to serve the Church. What do you do? Well, you can apply for being a monk, a Franciscan friar, a Dominican, there’s different types of Augustinian, there’s different types of monastic orders that you can go in. If you’re a woman you can join a convent, become a nun.

The Jesuits are another one of the monastic orders, they’re the military sort of the scheming and whatever else type of a monastic order. Early on though they would fall under this whole thing. There are people that are Jesuit trained and they get out there and they have a basically a secular life. they’re not living at some kind of a monastery or whatever else and whatever.

But when you first go into this monastic orders you have to do certain things. You say like what? Take certain vows, vows of chastity. You don’t go out and fornicate and whatever else, a vow of poverty, you give up whatever money you have to enter into that order. A vow of obedience, you will do what your superiors tell you to do. Those are the main ones. And that’s what they do.

Well, what is that? It’s communal living, Communism. Think about it. You have some guy that was raised in a trailer park and he doesn’t have two nickels to to rub together and you have some guy that was raised in some wall street banker was his father and he’s got all kinds of money and everything else they both want to join a monastic order. Guess what? They’re coming in at the same level. They are. They’re going to have to give up their money, they’re going to have to give up their ambitions and whatever else, and they will have to submit to their rules and the authority of it. That’s what they do. It’s Communism. And think about what else they do. They all wear the same uniform, they all live together, they all eat together, they’ll make the same pay. You see? You say that sounds kind of like something else, doesn’t it? Well, I don’t know like …the military? Hmm you see what well there are generals, yeah I know, and they’re high-level Jesuits and there’s others and whatever else that they get away from that early monastic type of system, but when you enter into it what do you have? Uniform!

They even cut your hair the same. Communal living. You all live at the barracks there. And you’re under orders. Sounds kind of like up here (points to monastic orders on the chart) doesn’t it? And what are these people doing? They’re there for the service of the Church, aren’t they? What are these people (points to the military soldiers section of the chart) doing? Hey, I just want to thank you for your service to God and country. (Sarcasm) Who is their God? God and country? You know what I mean? Spiritual, temporal? Hmm. I mean “I’m joining the military to serve God and country!” What are you going to do? Pass out Gospel tracts? Go out and preach the gospel? You’re going to print bibles and give them out? No. How are you serving God when you join the military? “We’re going to go fight police action in foreign countries and beat down Communism. We’re going to beat Communism by practicing Communism.” (Laughs)Yeah. Think. I mean knock a few times and if nobody answers up there you might want to…

Socialism. “Capitalism is so bad and it’s just so terrible and there’s monopolizing and whatever else and these these capitalists are so greedy and whatever else.” Well yeah, there’s some of that stuff over here on the Fascist side, but that doesn’t mean that people shouldn’t be able to make money on their own and shouldn’t be able to have their own business and shouldn’t be able to take care of their own life. But see, the Socialist comes along and they say, “The workers need to unite. Let’s come together. The workers unite. We have the hammer and sickle down here. See the sickle, the farmer, the hammer, the factory worker. Let’s let’s unite. Let’s come together. Let’s have a social Socialist country where we all work in factories.” You say, “Well yeah but the farmers, farmers aren’t working in factories, got you there, Brian.” Well, if you understand what big agriculture is, it’s essentially a factory.

Well, I’m a vegetarian I don’t go with the the factories where they put in these cows and they milk them with machines and just herding hundreds of them through there and they just milk them until the cow drops dead, taking far more out of them than their bodies can barely even handle. And so I’m a vegetarian. “What about your vegetables? What about the fruits that come from Central America?” I’ve seen the banana plantations in person, Dole and Chiquita run down in Honduras and Costa Rica. I was there. I’ve seen how it’s an oligarchy down there, and they pay the people just barely any money. I’ve seen it. I’ve seen the pineapples and the bananas and the big plantations and things. Yeah, don’t tell me it’s not a factory. A factory doesn’t have to have four walls. It can have four borders of a field too, if I can say it that way. Factory workers, you’re out there sitting at the sewing machine making the Communist Chinese … again communist. See? China. Who do you think set that up? I won’t won’t tell you, you just have to figure it out on your own. But they’re in there in the factories they’ve got the women working at the sewing machines just sewing shirts for the capitalists over here and the Fascists. And we’re going to make the little toys that we can sell at Walmart and whatever else. “Well yeah, I can see that that’s Communism, but not the fields!” Oh you mean the people that are out there bent over in the hot sun and they’re they’re working in the fields working in the heat, getting things for the global market?

How about universal basic income? There are people that are calling for that right now! “Hey, we can’t work anymore because of the baloney virus and it’s kind of killed but not really killed but sort of killed a lot of people so we have to shut down the economy and people couldn’t pay their rent and they couldn’t pay their mortgages so we need to have universal basic income! We shouldn’t have to pay for our housing anymore! That’s bad! We shouldn’t have to pay rent or mortgage! That’s a terrible thing! Common housing? Hmm! “Oh, it’s brand new. This pandemic has caused some new things!” No it hasn’t! No it hasn’t! They’re just trying to bring in Communism through Socialism.

“Why would you be against these things?! There’s people that are hurting! A lot of people died! There’s people that might be out on the streets unless we do something to step in and make it that they don’t have to work anymore! Social justice! We need social justice! This is wrong! This Fascist system over here with the capitalism and everything else they’ve come in and they charge too much for rent and they charge the housing prices are inflated and and there’s all this money out there and debt and everything else and we need to get rid of that and just make everybody live the same!” You see how it works? So there’s this system, Communism, the left arm of the cross of Catholicism.

Now let’s talk about the right wing. You say well, what’s the symbol of Fascism? The symbol of Fascism is the Swastika. No. Actually, if you study what the Swastika is, it was an ancient sort of an Indian Hindu type of a symbol for good luck, essentially. That’s all it is.

The Nazis just took it. The Nazis did some really weird bizarre stuff and they took a lot of things from the Orient and from kind of like the Tibet area and whatever else and they took some Hinduism and the Nazis were Occultists. They were Occultists and they controlled through occult means and whatever else just like people do today in a lot of these governments. The symbol for Fascism is right there, a Fasces, a Roman Fasces, an axe that’s controlling all the little sticks that are bound together. We’re all in this together. Do you ever hear that one? Yeah Fasces.

And you say, “Well I think I’ve seen that before!” Well if you look at an old mercury dime here in America it was on the back of the mercury dime, a Roman Fasces.

(Transcribed up to 13 minutes and 6 seconds. I may add more later. Please see the video!)

Video of talk

2 Thessalonians 2:11-12  And for this cause God shall send them strong delusion, that they should believe a lie: That they all might be damned (judged / condemned) who believed not the truth, but had pleasure in unrighteousness.

While reading this scripture with my wife this morning (July 30, 2022) I had a sudden inspiration to work on a project of making a list of all the false things people believe in. I’ll start off with the most obvious falsehoods such as doctrines contrary to the first three chapters of the Book of Genesis. I hope to make this list as complete and comprehensive as possible, and that means I’ve begun a massive project! And it also means I need your help! Anything you consider to be a false ideology that is not included in my list, please write about it in the comment section below and if I agree that it’s a valid point, I will include it in the numbered list. The list is numbered because I’m using “ordered list” HTML code which automatically adds numbers in consecutive order at the beginning of each point of the list.

Some of the points on the list may be controversial even among Christians! Please know I am standing with what the majority of God’s people believe to be false. These points will be based mainly on the writings of the saints of God who lived during the first 300 years of the Protestant Reformation before the Jesuits infiltrated Protestant churches. I will add them to the end of the list.

What is a “delusion”? I like how this word is defined in Wikipedia.

A delusion is a false fixed belief that is not amenable to change in light of conflicting evidence.

Merriam-Webster defines it as:

something that is falsely or delusively believed or propagated.

What we believe to be true or false determines our policies in life. For example, if you believe that climate change / global warming is indeed caused by burning fossil fuels, you would support President Biden’s decision to eliminate all fossil fuels such as burning coal to run electric power plants and canceling the Keystone XL pipeline project. And if you believe Biden is really following a leftist Marxist agenda to increase the cost of energy which purposely hurts the economy and decreases the size of middle-class America in order to promote a socialist government where the individual is totally dependent on Uncle Sam for all their needs, you will oppose Biden’s energy policies.

Proverbs 14:12  ¶There is a way which seemeth right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death.

You may think something is true, but if it’s actually false, it could lead to your ruin.

The list begins with a false belief and follows with evidence from the Bible or science that refutes it.

1. The belief there is no God and that the Universe and all living things created itself. Professor Stephen Hawking taught that all that’s needed to create life is matter and gravity!
   • Genesis 1:1  ¶In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.
   • All of the first chapter of Genesis refutes this.
   • Genesis 1:1 confirms Einstein’s space-time continuum. Before the “beginning”, there was no time, no space (heaven), and no matter (earth).
2. The belief that the origin of life was by random chance. This is what my high school biology teacher taught.
   • Genesis 2:7  And the LORD God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living soul.– An intelligent purposeful act by our Creator.
   • There is no evidence that life developed, or even could have developed, by a purely natural process. See: Not By Chance – Shattering the Modern Theory of Evolution
   • Life orignated by random chance violates the law of biogenesis which states that life arises from pre-existing life, not from nonliving material.
3. The belief there is no design in life or in the universe. This is what the famous atheist, Professor Richard Dawkins teaches.
   • Psalms 139:16  Thine eyes did see my substance, yet being unperfect; and in thy book (DNA) all my members were written, which in continuance were fashioned, when as yet there was none of them.
   • All life is composed of cells and all cells have DNA which is complex code. Code is information. Information can only come from an intelligent source. Seeing words in the sand on a beach is seeing information. You know someone – an intelligent source – wrote it.
4. The belief there are more than two genders.
   • Genesis 1:27  So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.
   • Genesis 5:2  Male and female created he them; and blessed them, and called their name Adam, in the day when they were created.
5. The belief it’s OK to identify with a gender that is opposite of one’s sex at birth. Adding insult to injury, some corporations now insist their employees use the preferred pronouns of people who identify as transgender.
   • Deuteronomy 22:5  ¶The woman shall not wear that which pertaineth unto a man, neither shall a man put on a woman’s garment: for all that do so are abomination unto the LORD thy God.
     This scripture indicates to me that one’s gender is permanently determined by our Creator.
   • Males have X Y chromosomes. Females have X X chromosomes. No sex change operation can alter one’s chromosomes.
6. The belief a man can get pregnant. Thank goodness this belief is still a fringe minority of “woke” people.
   • Genesis 3:16  ¶Unto the woman he (God) said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children;
   • The idea a man can get pregnant is so opposed to biology and science, it’s incredible to think anyone believes it!
7. The belief it’s OK for a transgender biological male to compete with women in physical sports.
   • Common sense combined with the knowledge of differences in the anatomy of males and females tells you how unfair to women this is! We are talking about the difference in muscle size, amount of fatty tissue, and lung size. How about competition between men and women based on mental skills such as chess? I would have no problem with that.
8. The belief it’s OK to be gay.
   • Leviticus 18:22  Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is abomination.
   • Leviticus 20:13  If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination:
   • Medically speaking, it’s harmful to health.
9. The belief it’s OK for humans to have sex with animals. Half of the people on www.quora.com who commented about this subject think so.
   • Leviticus 18:23  Neither shalt thou lie with any beast to defile thyself therewith: neither shall any woman stand before a beast to lie down thereto: it is confusion. Defile not ye yourselves in any of these things: for in all these the nations are defiled which I cast out before you:
10. The belief there is no such thing as sin. Buddhists believe this which is why they seek salvation through self efforts.
• Romans 3:23  For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God;
  Romans 5:12  Wherefore, as by one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin; and so death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned:
11. The belief in the concept of different “races” among humans. I think this idea first came from Darwin’s book, “On the Origin of Species by Means of Natural Selection, or the Preservation of Favoured Races in the Struggle for Life”
    • Acts 17:26  And hath made of one blood all nations of men for to dwell on all the face of the earth, and hath determined the times before appointed, and the bounds of their habitation;
    • Race is a social construct. Biologically, homo sapiens consist of one species. There is only one race in humanity. It’s called the “human race.” The concept of race breeds the notion that one ethnic group such as white Europeans are superior to other peoples such as Black Africans. Some people consider Blacks inferior on the evolutionary scale. Some British considered native Tasmanians no different from animals. They put a married Tasmanian man in a cage, and he became so dispondent, he took his own life. No animal intentionally commits suicide. Just the fact that a White person can get a blood transfusion from a Black African with the same blood type disproves the idea that different peoples are superior than others due to darwinian evolution. Evolution of the species is a belief system and pseudoscience.
12. The belief that people can be saved by means other than through Jesus Christ. All non-Christian religions teach this.
    • John 14:6  Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.
    • Acts 4:12  Neither is there salvation in any other: for there is none other name (other than the name of Jesus) under heaven given among men, whereby we must be saved.
    • 1 Thessalonians 5:9  For God hath not appointed us to wrath, but to obtain salvation by our Lord Jesus Christ,
13. The belief that people will go to Heaven because of their own goodness or by doing good works. I used to believe this when I was a Catholic.
    • Titus 3:5  Not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to his mercy he saved us, by the washing of regeneration, and renewing of the Holy Ghost;
    • Ephesians 2:8.9 For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast.
    • Galatians 2:16  Knowing that a man is not justified by the works of the law, but by the faith of Jesus Christ, even we have believed in Jesus Christ, that we might be justified by the faith of Christ, and not by the works of the law: for by the works of the law shall no flesh be justified.
14. The belief that abortion is essential health care. This is the message on the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists’ website!
    • Exodus 20:13  Thou shalt not kill.
    • Deuteronomy 27:25  Cursed be he that taketh reward to slay an innocent person. And all the people shall say, Amen.
    • Abortion is bad for women’s health. Ref: https://www.lifesitenews.com/opinion/why-abortion-is-bad-for-womens-health/
    • Side Effects and Risks of Abortion See: https://fcws.org/side-effects-risks-abortion/
15. The belief that mercury and aluminium in vaccines are safe. Snopes claims it’s FALSE to say they are not safe! We shouldn’t go by these so called “fact-checkers.”
    • “When it comes to aluminum and mercury, one plus one does not equal two. The toxicity of mercury alone, and the toxicity of aluminum alone—both of which are concerning enough—are each far below the toxicity that results from exposure to both. Tests of the two metals in combination show that the toxicity levels skyrocket.” Reference: Aluminum and Mercury Synergy: A “Perfect Storm”
    • There is an abundance of research establishing a definite link between aluminum and the development of neurological disease. Reference: Vaccine Dangers: Is the Aluminum in Vaccines Worth the Risk?
16. The belief that we should always “trust the science” and especially when the “science” is taught by the government and mainstream media. My scientist friend tells me otherwise.
    • “Trust the science” is an irresponsible message, one at odds with the supposed spirit of science itself. Reference: https://www.resilientperformance.com/blog/trust-the-science
    • A just-published exposé in the journal Science claims that a seminal study on the causes of Alzheimer’s disease may contain falsified data. See: Scientists are Destroying Our Trust in Science
17. The belief that climate change is caused by human activity, and especially the burning of fossil fuels which release carbon dioxide in the atmosphere. Western governments and the Pope are promoting this. It’s the reason why energy costs are rising. The Left is promoting the climate change scam to wreck the economy to get rid of the Middle Class and bring us back to the feudalistic society of Europe in the Middle Ages.
    • According to the Director of the Center for Sun-Climate Research at the Danish Space Research Institute at the Danish National Space Center, we have recently experienced “the highest solar activity we have had in at least 1,000 years.”
    • Cosmic rays blamed for global warming
    • An article from Dr. John G. Hartnett, PhD: The Great Global Warming Myth
18. The belief that we should trust the government and all its agencies. Joe Biden wants us to do that. When I was a kid, I would never believe the government could lie.
    • Psalms 146:3  Put not your trust in princes, nor in the son of man, in whom there is no help.
    • Luke 13:31,32 The same day there came certain of the Pharisees, saying unto him (Jesus), Get thee out, and depart hence: for Herod will kill thee. And he said unto them, Go ye, and tell that fox…
      Jesus was calling King Herod a wily, cunning, shifty deceptive ruler.
    • Revelation 13:7  And it was given unto him (the Beast, the world government) to make war with the saints, and to overcome them:
    • “The Greatest Threat to Truth and Virtue in This Country Is the Government” – Pastor John MarArthur. Ref: https://caldronpool.com/macarthur-the-greatest-threat-to-truth-and-virtue-in-this-country-is-the-government/
    • I can’t begin to count how many times the government told me something during my adult lifetime only to find out later that it wasn’t so.
19. The belief that Covid vaccines are safe and effective.
    • President Biden is sick again with Covid in spite of being vaccinated and boosted.
    • The graph on Open Vaccine Adverse Event Reporting System website indicates Covid vaccinations are harmful.
      
    • In spite of being vaccinated, the pathogen is still spreading and people are still getting sick. Some people my wife and I know have died after vaccination though they were much younger than us.
    • I am 72 years old and have not been vaccinated for Covid. In March 2022, I was in bed for a couple of days with flu-like symptoms and felt weak for one week. My God-given immunue system destroyed the and I recoved without without going to a doctor or taking medicine. That’s only once so far since the Covid pandemic hysteria started. I now have antibodies against the coronavirus which are much better than any vaccine can give me. My wife tells me that employees at Macy’s frequently call in sick and need her to replace them. They have all been vaccinated for Covid. My wife is unvaccinated.
20. The belief that the earth is flat.
    • If you think the earth is not a globe that rotates once every 24 hours which creates both day and night, please see the articles on this website about it.
21. The belief we can have our own truths, and that we don’t have to listen to others because of our own truth.
    • Truth is is not subjective to the individual.
    • God’s Truth from the Bible is the only truth that matters. John 17:17  Sanctify them through thy truth: thy word is truth.
    • Proverbs 14:12  There is a way which seemeth right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death.
22. The belief that Jesus was just a good man, not God.
• Jesus was the Creator of the universe who was born on earth to experience life with His creations!
• John 1:1  In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.
  2  The same was in the beginning with God.
  3  All things were made by him; and without him was not any thing made that was made.
  14  And the Word was made flesh, and dwelt among us, (and we beheld his glory, the glory as of the only begotten of the Father,) full of grace and truth.
23. The belief that man can perfect himself and increase the speed of his evolution through technology.
    • This is what the false prophet Yuval Noah Harari teaches: Transhumanism
    • You cannot change God’s creation without negative consequences! People are dying after being injected with the Coronavirus vaccine.
    • Genesis 1:31  And God saw every thing that he had made, and, behold, it was very good.

Please submit any suggestions you may have in the comment section. Thank you!

This is part of an article entitled, “The Origin of the Pretribulation Rapture” by Tim Warner of www.4windsfellowships.net

The story of the development of pretribulationism is a tangled one. From its inception in the early 1800s, there has been a deliberate attempt to cover up its origins. And the cover up continues to this day. This has been perpetrated along two lines of revisionism. One was to hide the real origin of pretribulationism in 19th century Scotland, and attribute it to John Nelson Darby and the Plymouth Brethren. The other has been a recent attempt to selectively quote and misrepresent ancient Christian documents to make it appear early Christian writers were pretribulationists. The purpose of this article is to document a timeline of the major events in the development of this relatively new prophetic viewpoint.

THE REFORMATION CHURCH

During and after the Protestant Reformation (16th century), Protestant Christians held to what is called “historicism,” a view of prophecy that considers the events of Revelation as occurring all throughout the Church’s history. This was supported by employing the “year-day theory” — that the 1260, 1290, & 1335 days mentioned in Daniel and Revelation should be interpreted as years. It was common for Protestants to identify the Roman Catholic Church with Mystery Babylon, and the papacy with the Antichrist. Since historicists considered the tribulation as encompassing most of the Church age, and viewed themselves as being in the tribulation, they were necessarily posttribulationists. This view lent itself to a flurry of date-setting in the first half of the 19th century, where the 1260, 1290, & 1335 days (years) were calculated from the Roman Church’s rise to supreme power under the Roman Emperors, until the second coming.

THE RETURN TO PREMILLENNIALISM

Morgan Edwards

Morgan Edwards was a Baptist minister in Pennsylvania in the mid-late 1700s. As a teenager and seminary student, Morgan wrote a hypothetical essay as part of his seminary training. Morgan was assigned the task, by his tutor, to write an essay on the Millennium using literal interpretation. In Morgan’s hypothetical scenario, he separated the rapture from the second coming by at least 3.5 years. His work seems to be a mixture of futurism and historicism. And, Morgan contradicted himself and made many obvious errors. Yet, his work appears to be the very first time the rapture was separated from the second coming of Christ. Many years later (1788), Morgan published his essay in a book. While Morgan Edwards is sometimes cited as a pretribulationist, his work indicates that he did not wish to be seen as a literalist, and was content with the typical historicist view of the times. He insisted that his work was purely hypothetical. Furthermore, there is no apparent connection between Morgan Edwards’ essay and modern pretribulationism. Morgan’s later works do not display pretribulationist thinking. We must look elsewhere for the origins of modern pretribulationism.

Father Manuel de Lacunza

Fr. Manuel de Lacunza was a Roman Catholic Jesuit priest, born in Chili in 1731, and sent to Spain at the young age of 15 to become a Jesuit priest. When the Jesuits were expelled from Spain in 1767, Fr. Lacunza moved to Italy. In 1790, he wrote a book on prophecy, called The Coming of Messiah in Glory and Majesty, which was published in Spain in 1812. Fr. Lacunza wrote under the pen name, Juan Josafat Ben-Ezra (a converted Jew), allegedly to avoid detection since his book ended up on Rome’s banned books list.

Fr. Lacunza’s book promoted a return to the literal interpretation of Old Testament prophecy, and the primitive futurist view of Revelation. He rejected the “year-day theory” of the historicists. Consequently, he saw a personal Antichrist and future tribulation of 1260 days, followed by the second coming of the Lord. He did not espouse a pretribulation rapture.

Edward Irving

Edward Irving was the pastor of a Church of Scotland (Presbyterian) congregation in London in the 1820s. Irving became aware of Fr. Lacunza’s book, and was so impressed with it, he took it upon himself to translate it into English, adding a lengthy Preliminary Discourse of his own. Irving’s English translation was published in 1827. Irving’s developing prophetic views can be clearly discerned from his Preliminary Discourse, including, surprisingly, all the key elements of dispensationalism that later showed up in Darby’s writings. Irving indicated that he had been teaching these things to his congregation beginning in Christmas 1825, several years before Darby embraced dispensational ideas.

Irving strongly denounced the apostasy of the Christian denominations in his preaching. He proclaimed that God was about to restore Apostles and prophets to the Church in the last days, and that a great Pentecostal outpouring would come just before the soon return of Jesus Christ. Right on schedule, rumors of healings, tongues, visions, and other manifestations began circulating in Port Glasgow, Scotland, from the home of James and George MacDonald and their sister Margaret. People came from England, Ireland, and Scotland to observe the strange manifestations in the prayer meetings held by the MacDonalds.

The “revival” quickly spread to Irving’s church, with tongues, prophecy, and other maMargaret MacDonald’s Visions – March, 1830nifestations breaking out. Irving was eventually defrocked by the Church of Scotland because of the strange goings on, and his heretical views of the person of Christ, (he taught that Jesus had a fallen human nature). So, Irving moved his congregation to a rented hall, forming the Catholic Apostolic Church. Not only were tongues, prophetic revelations, and other alleged miracles occurring in Irving’s congregation, but these ecstatic utterances focused on end-time prophecy concerning the coming of the Lord.

Margaret MacDonald’s Visions – March, 1830

In March or April of 1830, after being ill and bed-ridden for about 18 months, Margaret MacDonald claimed to have seen a series of visions. She wrote down these visions in a series of letters, and sent copies to Edward Irving. A month later (June), Irving claimed in a private letter, that Margaret’s visions had a huge impact on him: “the substance of Mary Campbell’s and Margaret MacDonald’s visions or revelations, given in their papers, carry to me a spiritual conviction and a spiritual reproof which I cannot express.”

The outstanding feature of Margaret’s visions was an outpouring of the Holy Spirit on an elite group within Christianity, just prior to the coming of Antichrist. She saw only “Spirit filled” Christians being caught up to meet Jesus in the air, which she identified as the five “wise virgins” of Jesus’ parable in Matthew 25. The rest of Christianity, the “foolish virgins,” would be left to be purged and purified by suffering at the hands of the Antichrist, until they were fit to be with the Lord.

The Morning Watch – September 1830

The official quarterly publication of the Irvingite charismatics was called, “The Morning Watch.” It had exclusively promoted a posttribulation second coming through mid- 1830. But, the September 1830 issue featured part two of an article by someone named, “Fidus,” promoting the theory that the seven letters in Revelation describe seven consecutive “Church Ages.” In this article, Fidus articulated the new idea of a partial pretribulation rapture. He saw the Philedelphian (Spirit filled) church being raptured prior to the tribulation, and the Laodicean church representing the rest of Christianity. The Morning Watch was quickly becoming the vehicle for providing a biblical basis for Margaret MacDonald’s pretribulation rapture of “Spirit filled” Christians.

The Morning Watch – June, 1831

In the June 1831 issue of The Morning Watch, Edward Irving made his pretribulationism crystal clear. His biblical support for the elite “Spirit-filled” believers being raptured before the tribulation was the catching up of the “man-child” in Revelation 12. Irving argued that the body of Christ has been “united to Him by regeneration of the Holy Ghost, ‘born of God, sons of God,’ (Rev. ii. 27; xii. 5). And therefore we with him are called Christ (1 Cor. xii. 12).” Irving went on to say that, “with this key [that Spirit filled Christians are also “Christ,” and that the catching up of the “man child” refers to the rapture of Spirit-filled believers] the Old Testament prophecies which speak of Christ must be interpreted, … and especially those prophecies which speak of the pregnant woman: to all which an explicet key is given to us in the xiith chapter of Revelation; where, though the child is spoken of as one (ver. 5), it is also described as many (ver. 11), who overcame the acuser; and when that number is accomplished, there are still a remnant of her seed, whom the dragon doth persecute and seek to destroy (ver. 17). This two-fold company – the one gathered before, and the other after the travailing woman is cast out into the wilderness, … – do together constitute the New Jerusalem, the bride of the Lamb, which cometh down from heaven.” (pp. 301-302).

The Morning Watch – December, 1832

An anonymous writer in the December 1832 (p. 249) issue of The Morning Watch likely referred to Margaret MacDonald’s letters (and probably her friend Mary Campbell & Emily Cardale of London) with the following words; “The Spirit of God has caused several young women, in different parts of Great Britain, to condense into a few broken sentences more and deeper theology than ever Vaughan, Chalmers, or Irving uttered in their longest sermons; and therefore more than all the rest of the Evangelical pulpits ever put forth in the whole course of their existence.”

Robert Baxter (1833)

British Lawyer, Robert Baxter, was an early member of the Irvingite charismatics. Baxter had previously been a posttribulationist, but eventually adopted the pretribulation rapture views of Irving. He, along with several other “prophets” of the Catholic Apostolic Church, gave many prophecies, all of which failed. He later became disillusioned with the whole movement, and abandoned Irvingism (and pretribulationism). Upon his departure, he wrote an expose of Irvingism, called Narrative of Facts, Characterizing the Supernatural Manifestations in Members of Mr. Irving’s Congregation (1833), including Irving’s early pretribulation teachings. “An opinion had been advanced in some of Mr. Irving’s writings, that before the second coming of Christ, and before the setting in upon the world of the day of vengeance, emphatically so called in the Scriptures, the saints would be caught up to heaven like Enoch and Elijah; and would be thus saved from the destruction of this world, as Noah was saved in the ark, and Lot was saved from Sodom.” Baxter wrote that the coming of the Lord was the main topic of the prophetic utterances in Irving’s congregation. Looking back, he thought they had all been deceived by lying spirits pretending to be the Holy Spirit.

Robert Norton (1861)

Robert Norton was the author of “The Restoration of Apostles and Prophets in the Catholic Apostolic Church” (1861). Norton took a favorable view of the Irvingite movement, writing in the preface that his book was offered “as proofs or illustrations of its heavenly origin and character.” Norton named Margaret MacDonald as the first to proclaim the “new doctrine” of a pretribulation rapture, which was picked up by Edward Irving.

Samuel P. Tregelles (1855/1864)

Samuel P. Tregelles was the most eminent Plymouth Brethren scholar of the 19th century, with first hand knowledge of the Irvingites. In an 1855 article in The Christian Annotator, Tregelles wrote that the true Christian hope is the final “advent” and “not some secret advent, or secret rapture to the Lord, as Judaizers supposed might be the case…”. (A later Plymouth Brethren writer, William Kelly, also identified the Irvingites as the “Judaizers”). Nine years later, Tregelles published “The Hope of Christ’s Second Coming,” in which he wrote: “But when the theory of a secret coming of Christ was first brought forward (about the year 1832), it was adopted with eagerness: … I am not aware that there was any definite teaching that there would be a secret rapture of the Church at a secret coming, until this was given forth as an “utterance” in Mr. Irving’s Church, from what was there received as being the voice of the Spirit. But whether any one ever asserted such a thing or not, it was from that supposed revelation that the modern doctrine and the modern phraseology respecting it arose. It came not from Holy Scripture, but from that which falsely pretended to be the Spirit of God, while not owning the true doctrine of our Lord’s incarnation in the same flesh and blood as His brethren, but without taint of sin.” The last statement, “not owning the true doctrine of our Lord’s incarnation … without taint of sin,” referred to the Irvingite cult’s heretical view of the person of Christ, and to the Apostle John’s test that any spirit not acknowledging the true doctrine of the incarnation was of “the spirit of antichrist,” (1 John 4:1-3).

John Nelson Darby

The Irish lawyer, John Nelson Darby, one of the founders of the Plymouth Brethren, is typically credited by pretribulationists as the man who “revived” dispensational pretribulationism. Yet it is clear that Darby was a latecomer to pretribulationism, which originated among the Irvingites. Darby wrote his first prophecy paper in 1829. In this paper, he clearly did not have dispensationalist or pretribulationist views. Darby argued that unfulfilled Old Testament prophecy concerning the restoration of Israel should be applied to the Church, the typical historicist – amillennial point of view. He also placed the Church on earth until Armageddon, showing he was still a posttribulationist. By this time, dispensationalist ideas were already well developed in Irving’s 1826 Preliminary Discourse. Darby was familiar with Irving and his ideas. On pages 6-10 & 19-21, Darby referred to Irving, de Lacunza, The Morning Watch, and even quoted some of Irving’s works, including his Preliminary Discourse! So, while dispensational concepts may have eventually taken root in Darby’s mind, they were not developed by him! He borrowed them from Irving.

In 1830, Darby was still defending historicism against futurism three months after the pretribulational “Fidus” article appeared in The Morning Watch. In the December 1830 issue of The Christian Herald, Darby published an article entitled, “On ‘Days’ Signifying ‘Years’ in Prophetic Language.” Darby defended the standard historicist view, that the 1260 day tribulation meant 1260 years. Consequently, he saw the tribulation as largely past, and could not possibly have been expecting a pretribulation rapture, which requires a “futurist” viewpoint.

In 1830, J. N. Darby also visited the MacDonald’s in Port Glasgow, and observed the strange manifestations in their prayer meetings, as Darby later recalled. Darby described the sequence of events — who prayed, who spoke in tongues, etc. But, while he noted Margaret’s speaking, he failed to mention the subject of her prophesying. However, John Cardale, who was also present, wrote that Margaret “commenced also speaking … gave testimony to the judgments coming on the earth; but also directed the church to the coming of the Lord as her hope of deliverance,” and was heard speaking in a loud voice “denouncing the coming judgments.” Therefore, we can conclude that Darby was fully aware that the pretribulation rapture was a subject of the prophecies among the MacDonalds and the Irvingite charismatics. It was nine more years before Darby clearly espoused a pretribulation rapture in his published works.